Do you send a thank you card?

I have already sent out thank you cards to everyone that gave us a gift or a card, but what about people that did not get you anything? We had several of our friends not give us anything. Now, I did not invite people to the wedding to get gifts, but a card wishing us well would have been nice. Am I suppose to send them a thank you card for attending the wedding? I really don't want to sound like a b-itch, but I honestly don't know what to do.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

we had that happen as well, and we are sending TY to all who attended.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

DH sent a thank you to the 2 different people who came and didn't even give us a card...I didn't want to...at least my cousin gave us a card even though he could not give us a gift.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

If I didn't get a card I had NO record a person was actually there, so I did not bother writing a thank you. (I did get a card from everyone though)... we got one stiffer and she was in the BP... and I sent her a thank you for being a part of the day and did not thank her for a gift.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

i say send a thank you for them being there...
it would have been nice for them to at least get you a card, but you dont' want to seem like you're just out for gifts...

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

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Posted by palebride

i say send a thank you for them being there...
it would have been nice for them to at least get you a card, but you dont' want to seem like you're just out for gifts...

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This is what we did and how we felt.

I was shocked some people couldn't even bring a card.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

We did received gifts from the 'not attend' guests and thank you cards were sent to those. We also received cards only from the 'not attend' guests which we also wrote thank you cards to. We wrote something like: 'Thank you for your wedding card. It will be put into our wedding scrapbook to be adored for years to come.'

We did NOT send thank you cards to the 'no gifts' and no thank you's to the 'no shows and no gifts.' Rude. Sometimes a simple card goes a long way even if there's no monetary or wrapped gift. How hard is it to get a wedding card? Hallmark sells them for $.99 surely anyone can afford that.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

I agree, but I am sending thank you cards to all...The ony person that seems to have stiffed me so far was a BM and her boyfriend.

I had two no shows who gave gifts, but of course you will get an, 'It broke my heart to not see you that day, but that you for your lovely cakeplate...'

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

I had a friend stiff us that really surprised me. She didnt get us a card, nor did she bring her guest. I sent her a thank you anyway. Just, 'Thanks for being a part of our day.' I just felt it was the right thing to do.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

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Posted by OctBride03

If I didn't get a card I had NO record a person was actually there, so I did not bother writing a thank you. (I did get a card from everyone though)... we got one stiffer and she was in the BP... and I sent her a thank you for being a part of the day and did not thank her for a gift.

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We did the same thing - with all the guests, it was impossible to keep track of gifts in any other way than counting the cards. Basically, anyone who gave us a card/gift were the people we sent thank you notes to. Mostly everyone sent a gift if they could not attend, and we only had one no-show/no-gift the day of. You're sending these thank you notes to the people who participated in your wedding - the way I see it, if there was no contribution, then there's nothing you need to be thanking them for! :) Then again, we paid for a lot of the wedding ourselves, so we were very sensitive about the no-gift inviteees! :) Honestly, if guests attended your wedding and didn't even bring a card, let alone a gift - then it's pretty rude for them to expect anything in return!

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

I sent TY with a 'Thanks for sharing our speical day' message but no mention of a gift. Some couldn't while others were just stiffers

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

Don't tell my hubby - but there was one person that didn't give us a card, I didn't send a thank you. I know I am being spiteful but I feel that she came, ate, danced, drank - had a great time, and recieved a favor. (which in my opinion a favor is a thank you for coming) So basically, I am waiting for her to send me a thank you! Totally Just Kidding!!

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

I am going to wait for a while longer - technically people have a year to send a gift. So I'm holding off on thank yous for those who didn't send a gift or give a card until this fall or winter. If they couldn't get it together to give us a card (despite the fact that we have been engaged for over 2 years with a date set!), then I feel no need to rush and get them a 'thank you for attending' card. However, I eventually will send all that attended a thank you of some sort.

Re: Do you send a thank you card?

I have stated this before that I had 2 non-gifters (no cards either) at my wedding and I never sent TYs to them. I know 'etiquette' states they have a yr to give a gift but at 3 mos when I sent out my TYs I knew I wasnt going to get anything and I never did.

I figure their night of free food and liquor and dancing, plus the favor was thank you enough. Why spend more $ to send a thank you on someone who couldnt even get a card for you...that is my philosophy. Most likely that person will just throw your TY in a drawer anyway. I highly doubt they are looking for that TY from you.....It's the people who gave a gift that want the TY....