Ex's on FB....

Are you guys friends with any of your Ex's on FB? I was snooping around FB and came across one of my old HS boyfriends on there. His page is private, so I cannot see any info..just his pics. I haven't heard much about him in 11 years..and I am so curious!! I wanna ask him how he is...but I don't wanna add him. DH wouldn't care either way, but I was just wondering..do you guys think its weird? I know he got really bad after we broke up...stole a car and was in jail for a few months. Maybe I shouldn't open up this can of worms? I'm just so curious!

Sidenote..I do have 2 non-serious olf BF's as FB friends.

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Posted by AwaitingAugust

I am FB friends with one of my ex's but I stalk one or two of the other ones on occasion. i don't communicate with them though.

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I totally stalk my first love (EX right before DH). I just check on his page here and there and await the his demise (he totally cheated on me with 3 girls over 2 years). We have spoke since our break up..but i dare NOT contact him on FB!

Its different with this guy...I don't know if I should leave it alone...or just satisfy my curiousity!

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Posted by MrsSx2

Its different with this guy...I don't know if I should leave it alone...or just satisfy my curiousity!

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if you want to talk to him for the sole purpose of getting gossip, i wouldn't contact him (just keep stalking). if you'd actually be interested in some form of friendship with him, then go for it

Everyone I know thinks this is totally weird, but I'm like BFF's with one of my exes.....because he is now gay.

And I knew it too - but whatevers, I broke up with him because he was a little weird and I just wasn't turned on anymore, and I broke his heart. This was like, 6 years ago. took us maybe 2 years to talk. We had a lot of mutual friends and it was just awkward after a while for everyone else to see us glare at one another. We reconciled after a friend was killed in a car crash and since then, things are pretty cool, and it's like, having another girlfriend. Honestly, it depends on the people.

That's it really. Another ex is on my facebook but we talk every tax season because I do his taxes.

I charge him too. :)

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Posted by jilliibabii

I'm FB friends with a few exes... two SERIOUS exes though... but our relationships were not nearly as explosive as yours sounded. If you haven't heard anything about him either way, I would probably leave well enough alone.

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oh, and I'd have to agree with Jill here....any ex that was involved in some scary business, I'd steer clear.

I'm not. I don't have any need or curiosity to see what they're up to though. DH is friends w/ two of his exes on FB...one of them we're actually good friends with (they dated like 10 years ago), and the other is out of her mind...but I can see her doing something stupid if DH de-friended her .

I am FB friends with both of my EX's who were serious boyfriends...one I don't talk to, the other we are starting up a friendship which makes me happy DH doesn't care because he knew I was upset that the ex and I weren't friends and now that we're repairing the friendship DH is happy for me

im FB friends with 2 or 3 of my exes- serious and non serious. But there is 1 ex who I would never friend however curious I am about him. Does your ex bf have any mutual friends so you could ask about him just to satisfy your curiousity?

I personally would friend him, we'd probably catch up and then not speak to him again.

My one super serious ex and I are DEF NOT FB friends... Sometimes I wish we were because of morbid curiosity, but we had a horrible break up (harrassing text messages, burning my stuff that i left at his place, breaking into my voicemail, etc.), so it's absolutely not possible.

After we broke up, I stopped replying to all of his awful messages and emails because actually repsonding only made it worse. Every few months after I stopped replying, I would get a message or two saying hateful things and then I got a 'Happy Birthday' message once also. The longest I went with no contact was about a year and then a month before our wedding he emailed me with this HUGE apology and he knew I was engaged and he felt bad about everything and wanted to see how I was doing, blah blah blah blah blah... Then like 15 mins later, he sent a follow up email saying 'i heard that you're getting married in a month. sorry for the bad timing. pretend i never emailed you.'

It took SO MUCH resistence to NOT message him and rip him a new one about how far I've moved on in life, but again ...no response is the best response.

Wow, my post really took a left turn from the OP lol...

i'm still friends with a few ex's... one of them i introduced to DH and they became pretty close, until he moved to NC.

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Posted by Linzee636

My one super serious ex and I are DEF NOT FB friends... Sometimes I wish we were because of morbid curiosity, but we had a horrible break up (harrassing text messages, burning my stuff that i left at his place, breaking into my voicemail, etc.), so it's absolutely not possible.

After we broke up, I stopped replying to all of his awful messages and emails because actually repsonding only made it worse. Every few months after I stopped replying, I would get a message or two saying hateful things and then I got a 'Happy Birthday' message once also. The longest I went with no contact was about a year and then a month before our wedding he emailed me with this HUGE apology and he knew I was engaged and he felt bad about everything and wanted to see how I was doing, blah blah blah blah blah... Then like 15 mins later, he sent a follow up email saying 'i heard that you're getting married in a month. sorry for the bad timing. pretend i never emailed you.'

It took SO MUCH resistence to NOT message him and rip him a new one about how far I've moved on in life, but again ...no response is the best response.

Wow, my post really took a left turn from the OP lol...

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OMG one of my other exes and I had a break up like this. It was HORRIBLE...it went on forever, He's the one I stalk but refuse to contact. It was such a crappy feeling to be at war with someone you just loved. Crazy!

The ex I am talking about in the OP...it was a bad break up..only because he refused to believe we were broken up. Then he acted out and got arrested and all that stuff. I guess I am soooo curious to see if he cleaned up his act and pulled his life together. But..if he hasn't...and I contact him...I wouldn't want him to try me to pull me into his shitstorm.

oy vey.

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Posted by MrsSx2


OMG one of my other exes and I had a break up like this. It was HORRIBLE...it went on forever, He's the one I stalk but refuse to contact. It was such a crappy feeling to be at war with someone you just loved. Crazy!

The ex I am talking about in the OP...it was a bad break up..only because he refused to believe we were broken up. Then he acted out and got arrested and all that stuff. I guess I am soooo curious to see if he cleaned up his act and pulled his life together. But..if he hasn't...and I contact him...I wouldn't want him to try me to pull me into his shitstorm.

oy vey.

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yeah, the curiosity aspect is a killer, but then wondering what the aftermath would be like if you do open that can of worms... can't predict what can happen there!

i have 3 serious exes. 1 is my first love from HS and yes we are friends on FB and even friendly, he (sincerely) sent me a sweet message when I got engaged etc. I'm alsot FB friends with my most recent ex before DH and he hates me cuz i broke his heart but we still have mutual friends so he pops up in my newsfeed from time to time

the one in between those two was a baaad breakup and he tried to add me once but i declined. (however i do have his sister on FB - weird I know)

I'm pretty good friends with some of them.

Some aren't on fb.

Some I'm just not friends on FB.

I tried to add one and he wouldn't add me back and I was always about it...

I think maybe he has a crazy wife.

I have 3 ex's on FB - 2 are from when I was 13 & 14 so they basically weren't real relationships, and one of them is gay. I catch up with both of them from time to time - not often though. The other is an interesting story lol. He's my most recent ex - my first love... He was DH's best friend that I dated for a few years before DH and I got together. He treated me pretty horrible the last year that we were together and I wound up cheating on him with DH, and I left him 2 days later for DH.. and we've been together ever since. That was over 4 years ago. Over the years, we've run into him in random bars or restaurants because we live literally around the corner from him (and we have mutual friends still), but we never spoke to him. We maintained a friendship for about 3 months after we broke up but then it ended because it was too difficult. He's had a girlfriend for almost 4 years now too.

So in October, I took defensive driving and of course he happens to be in the class. Great. After the class was over, we were walking to our cars and I just decided to end the silence & I said hi. We wound up talking for an hour in the parking lot and caught up on the last 4 years. Everything was great. DH didn't mind either - I told him immediately when I got home. In December, my ex friend requested both of us and we decided to give it a shot. We met him for drinks with a mutual friend a few days later, and we had him over at our place a few days after that. Since then, we've hung out a bunch of times with him and we just went out with him and his girlfriend a week or two ago.

I was one of those people who always thought ex's could NOT be friends but I was proven wrong. It's definitely possible if the past is completely resolved and everybody accepts it. My ex seems more like an old friend who I didn't speak to for a while than a person I was once in love with.

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Posted by AwaitingAugust

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Posted by MrsSx2

Its different with this guy...I don't know if I should leave it alone...or just satisfy my curiousity!

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if you want to talk to him for the sole purpose of getting gossip, i wouldn't contact him. if you'd actually be interested in some form of friendship with him, then go for it

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ITA.