facebook and exboyfriends...

jcslady Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:00 PM

facebook and exboyfriends...

so I haven't posted in a while but I am an a s s! what are you thoughtst?

an old boyfriend wanted to be friends so I said ok....backround I never really liked him when we dated he was a loser and I never saw a future with him and he is still a loser
I got my real estate license and he called me about getting a friend a place anyway he just called me today and my DH was home. I don't have anything to hide but when my DH asked me who it was I LIED.....I am ashamed I have no interest him and could care less if I talk to him but why did I do it???

what do you ladies do? does anyone to talk to ex's on facebook?

MnM182008 Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:02 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I have an ex on my facebook but my DH knows of him. Like you said you have no feelings for him, never saw a future it really shouldn't matter. Just keep your distance from him.

Mici n KC Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:10 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I have no ex's on FB that I'm friends with. Can't you just say a friend from back in the day?

RisiLeigh Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:12 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I have an ex on FB but we never even talk to each other. I stalk him once in awhile to see what he and his wife are up to LOL. Oh and he wished me congrats when DH and I got married but that's really all.

RockysGirl Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:20 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I feel like ex's should stay in the past where they belong. There's just no room for them in a marriage, it just hurts the other person. I know that for ME, I would be very very hurt if DH had any of his ex's on his facebook. He used to have one of them on his phone, but he deleted her because i was NOT comfortable with it. I don't know - I'm not a 'jealous' person, but I'm very sensitive when it comes to any of his ex-girlfriends.

I understand you lying just because you were thinking quick and didn't want DH to get upset. But that's a dangerous game to play. What if he sees on your phone that he called, or if the ex calls again and mentions something? I feel like your DH would be VERY suspicious only because you LIED about it. I think (in my opinion) you should stay away from the ex. He shouldn't be on your facebook at all and certainly not on your phone (why does he even have your number???)

Well, that's my take on it at least. Hope it helps

jcslady Posted: Mar 11, 2009 05:32 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

Posted by RockysGirl

I feel like ex's should stay in the past where they belong. There's just no room for them in a marriage, it just hurts the other person. I know that for ME, I would be very very hurt if DH had any of his ex's on his facebook. He used to have one of them on his phone, but he deleted her because i was NOT comfortable with it. I don't know - I'm not a 'jealous' person, but I'm very sensitive when it comes to any of his ex-girlfriends.

I understand you lying just because you were thinking quick and didn't want DH to get upset. But that's a dangerous game to play. What if he sees on your phone that he called, or if the ex calls again and mentions something? I feel like your DH would be VERY suspicious only because you LIED about it. I think (in my opinion) you should stay away from the ex. He shouldn't be on your facebook at all and certainly not on your phone (why does he even have your number???)

Well, that's my take on it at least. Hope it helps

I understand how you feel I agree we should not even be talking I was just trying to drumb up some business..I don't even like him! I have had the same phone number for eons..

Future Mulligan Posted: Mar 11, 2009 06:31 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

i would just mention it to your DH - just say that you spoke with him that way you aren't 'hiding' anything (which you aren't really) and you won't be feeling guilty about it anymore

squeekietoy Posted: Mar 11, 2009 07:05 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

All of my Ex's are Douche Nozzles. If I ever talk to any of them again, I would want someone to slap me silly.

But to answer your question, I would be honest. Maybe tell him 'Oh, it was my ex. He was inquiring about looking for a rental property for a friend of his because he knows I'm a real estate agent' blah blah blah. Something like that. You'll feel better telling him the truth than keeping it a secret.

kristin597 Posted: Mar 11, 2009 07:11 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I am friends with some of my exes on facebook. DH and I are both very good friends with one of my exes, thats actually how DH and I met. Like the other girls said, I think you should be upfront with DH and tell him that you are trying to generate some business.

jgl Posted: Mar 11, 2009 07:11 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

i would just have said, i added him on FB and then he needed some real estate help for a friend. i think in the end its better to be honest, esp when it was inocent. It ends up burning you in the buttt when the truth comes out. even if it was innocent it looks like you were hiding something

CD516 Posted: Mar 11, 2009 07:13 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I would tell my DH the truth. However, dont take this the wrong way ladies, i dont believe that anyone should communicate with ex's. There is just no point- we're married. Does your ex not know any other real estate agent in the world?? Of course he does. There is a reason he called you in my opinion , and its not real estate. JMO That being said, it was innocent on your end and you should just tell DH so it doesnt come out later.

catsgirl Posted: Mar 11, 2009 08:29 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

you need to be honest with your dh, especially if it was a business call. and personally he could have called any agent, and why is his friend having him call? you were wrong for being dishonest, jmo. and as for my dh and I we have no room for any ex's in our lives.

Wifeynella Posted: Mar 11, 2009 08:36 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

Id be upfront with DH. I have no exs on FB but I do talk to 2 of them (1 is a best friend and the other is an occasional convo every few months) but DH knows about it all.

I hate lying.

Butterfly123 Posted: Mar 11, 2009 10:40 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

DH was my first serious boyfriend. I mildly dated someone in HS but it was really nothing. Im friends with him on FB and it doesnt mean anything. He's married with a kid and we hardly ever talk. I dont think its a big deal as long as its not an ex that really meant a lot to you, or a bad break-up ex. This guy clearly means nothing to you and youre helping him with business. I understand why you lied. I probably would have been worried too and lied but not a good idea. Why dont you come clean and tell hubby he asked for your help thru FB. I really dont think its such a big deal.

lizzie217 Posted: Mar 11, 2009 11:02 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I can see why you lied....you were put on the spot and it just happened. You should just tell DH bc you didnt do anything wrong and by lying your making your self wrong, ya know?

emomma17 Posted: Mar 12, 2009 10:22 AM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

I don't have any exes on facebook that I know of, if I did I probaly wouldn't be friends with them but that is my choice because i didn't really maintain friendships with any exes since I did the breaking up and DH doesn't have Facebook but if he did I wouldn't be too thrilled with him being friends with any of his exes except for one. You probably just got flustered in the moment and said what came to your mind, if it makes you feel better and you think it won't start any drama than tell DH the truth.

kirstenjk Posted: Mar 12, 2009 10:22 AM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

This is just one of the many reasons why I am not on facebook - I don't want my past to find me!

I am only friends with one ex-bf - he has met DH and was at our wedding. DH is ok with it, doesn't get upset when we text, probably wouldn't like it if we hung out alone.

mrsjpc3 Posted: Mar 12, 2009 10:22 AM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

alllll the time. I am 100% secure and happy in my marriage, and hopefully any and all ex's are too. If the ex or their wife or girlfriend have a problem with it, then that's their own problem in their relationship, not mine.
i prob wouldnt mention that he called to your DH now, cause it may seem weird to him that you lied. IF he calls again, then tell him.

agraydc Posted: Mar 12, 2009 12:14 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

i have one ex but DH knows all about it
no secrets here

KK Holiday Posted: Mar 12, 2009 01:44 PM

Re: facebook and exboyfriends...

Posted by squeekietoy

All of my Ex's are Douche Nozzles.

I'm sorry but I had to laugh at that!!! excellent choice of words. my exes are from the same breed.

to answer the OP, i've had a few try to friend me on FB but I 'ignore'. I really dont want to go there. plus I want them to feel like I fell of the face of the earth, never to be seen or heard from again. thats how i like to think of them