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Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
i had to really think hard about this one - DH doesn't care if i spend money from our savings acct cause he knows how much i penny pinch to try to contribute to that piggy bank! that being said...i've probably taken money and remembered to tell him a few days later about it ![]()
i don't think that counts though! ![]()
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
It's hard for DH and I to sneak anything past each other b/c we are both always checking our account balances online. We use our debit cards all the time so every day we can see what the other one is buying. I always tease DH b/c he goes to these places in the city for breakfast with funny names... Toasties... Dishes... etc. and then I see them pop up on our account. The only way we could 'hide' something is if we put it on our credit cards. We still have our own separate ones. I will admit though, one time when we were 'supposed' to be dieting, I HAD to have a chocolate milkshake from McDonald's... so I charged it!! LOL Does that count??
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
We both are guilty of buying stupid crap.........but we do it together.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
Posted by GothBride55
We both are guilty of buying stupid crap.........but we do it together.
haha ! yup same here
unless its a gift for him--i NEVER keep purchases from DH. no way, no how. i know that if he did that to me--i'd rip his fuking head off. we have a joint account and each time one of us spends a dime...we tell the other one.
mainly for 2 reasons:
1) i keep everything up to date with Quicken--so every time the debit card is swiped or an ATM withdrawal is done--i need to know because its how i do our budget and you can keep track of every penny with the program. if he spend $100 and doesn't tell me--it could mess up my budget big time
2)its just common decency to me. if you are buying something and NOT telling your spouse about it---i think thats a bad sign that things are not being communicated in the relationship and that can lead to financial ruin.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
Hmmmm this is a good one. I remember the days of DH (then BF) picking me up at work and I'd have a new pair of shoes or whatever with me and if he'd ask, I'd say oh these old things? I had them at work. ![]()
While we were engaged, we had weekly meetings with our priest for a pre marital counseling type thing and my spending habits would come up, in fact our priest mentioned something about this DURING OUR CEREMONY ![]()
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However, I think it's VERY important for both parties in a marriage to know how much money is coming in and coming out. My spending habits have changed DRASTICALLY since we got engaged, and moreso after we got married. We are committed to being debt free in the future and our future plans, and the only way we can do that is if we budget and stick to it. Just this month we've taken budgeting to a whole new level with literally counting every dollar we spend since apparently we were estimating and we were WAY off![]()
There's NO WAY either of us would see a tax refund deposited in our bank account and go off and buy some frivolous thing without telling the other, as in the story in the OP. We have found that it's important to discuss what we want and what we need to purchase - we still have wiggle room and we have our own spending money each month to use as we please so it's not like we feel like we're a child asking a parent for spending money.
However, I think it's VERY important for both parties in a marriage to know how much money is coming in and coming out. My spending habits have changed DRASTICALLY since we got engaged, and moreso after we got married. We are committed to being debt free in the future and our future plans, and the only way we can do that is if we budget and stick to it. Just this month we've taken budgeting to a whole new level with literally counting every dollar we spend since apparently we were estimating and we were WAY off
There's NO WAY either of us would see a tax refund deposited in our bank account and go off and buy some frivolous thing without telling the other, as in the story in the OP. We have found that it's important to discuss what we want and what we need to purchase - we still have wiggle room and we have our own spending money each month to use as we please so it's not like we feel like we're a child asking a parent for spending money.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
I have to admit-guilty. i dont spend $$ on huge purchases anymore but books are my weekpoint and even though I have joined tardign sites, I still buy kids books any time I see them on sale-teachers know you need to have your own stuff for your classroom and even though i don'i have my lisence yet, if I see a book for $0.25 I don't turn it down. but ti adds quickly. but I still manage to pay our rent and my portion of the groceries. And I put away every week so its not bad. BUT i dont take the books home...![]()
I have em sent to my office or hide them at my mama's house cause DH cant deal with the 'clutter.'
But for big purchases we discuss it and we try not to use the cedit cards and be responsible. We got our debt WAY down and want to keep it that way-now just doing student loans.
But for big purchases we discuss it and we try not to use the cedit cards and be responsible. We got our debt WAY down and want to keep it that way-now just doing student loans.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
Posted by MJDoc12
Posted by GothBride55
We both are guilty of buying stupid crap.........but we do it together.
haha ! yup same here
unless its a gift for him--i NEVER keep purchases from DH. no way, no how. i know that if he did that to me--i'd rip his fuking head off. we have a joint account and each time one of us spends a dime...we tell the other one.
mainly for 2 reasons:
1) i keep everything up to date with Quicken--so every time the debit card is swiped or an ATM withdrawal is done--i need to know because its how i do our budget and you can keep track of every penny with the program. if he spend $100 and doesn't tell me--it could mess up my budget big time
2)its just common decency to me. if you are buying something and NOT telling your spouse about it---i think thats a bad sign that things are not being communicated in the relationship and that can lead to financial ruin.
I am such a loser...I bought Guitar Hero on Tour just to have it...and only played it for 5 seconds. FAGG!
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
We each keep a percentage of our paycheck for ourselves to spend on whatever we want, no questions asked. Everything else goes into a joint account for bills, rent etc. If I want something big for myself, I just have to save up for a few paychecks...then I can get whatever I want. It's easier this way. It's sort of like having an allowance...from ourselves.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
I'm surprised that the article doesn't indicate a difference between clothes bought on employee discount or a pedicure, vs 7 CREDIT CARDS MAXED OUT BY GAMBLING DEBT or PORN.
Is this woman CRAZY?????
Is this woman CRAZY?????
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
Posted by GothBride55
I am such a loser...I bought Guitar Hero on Tour just to have it...and only played it for 5 seconds. FAGG!
dude i'm so jealous--i hate you. i want that game...but i don't even have a DS. lol
next time we hang you MUST bring that game with you so i can show you what a REAL gamer looks like on there.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
no secrets here - we both have our own checking accounts in addition to the joint accounts (checking, savings). We use them for gifts for each other, gas, personal spending. The joint accounts are for bills, gifts to others, and everything else.
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Re: Financial Infidelity - you guilty?
We both buy and don't tell, so we are both guilty lol![]()
