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giving back the same gift?

suven Posted: Oct 15, 2004 03:37 PM+

suven MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5958 WEDDING DATE: May 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 15, 2004 03:37 PM

giving back the same gift?

Do you have to give back the same gift? What if this couple really p!ssed you off, for various reasons, at various times? Would you still give the same gift, or maybe a little less?

jillnbrad Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:00 PM+

jillnbrad MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1406 WEDDING DATE: Sep 10, 2004

Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:00 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

In my opinion I would give the same amount.

Stefanie Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:05 PM+

Stefanie MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 1815 WEDDING DATE: Aug 04, 2002

Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:05 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

You know, this is a good question. My friend who was in my wedding party brought a date to my wedding and gave me 150.00. (North Ritz Club~Sunday Night) She also writes me a letter saying...sorry I couldn't give more but I had to pay for the dress too, which was 160.00. THE NERVE OF HER!!! Now her wedding is next month and her BM dresses are 200. plus the shoes~$50, plus I had to pay for part of her shower~ $90, plus her bach party 100 bucks. I guess she's getting what she gave me...150!!!

myasmom Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:39 PM+

myasmom MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2599 WEDDING DATE: May 29, 2004

Posted: Oct 15, 2004 05:39 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

I say give what you get or buy a registry gift that may cost a little less.

Stefanie..why are you even in her wedding party if you are not that close..I would have turned her down.

princess99 Posted: Oct 16, 2004 06:15 AM+

princess99 MEMBER SINCE: 7/02 TOTAL POSTS : 2937 WEDDING DATE: Mar 28, 2004

Posted: Oct 16, 2004 06:15 AM

Re: giving back the same gift?

2 friends in particular that are married, did this to me. So when they had there weddings I gave a very nice gift for the time- one is married 10 years ago , and another 7 years ago. Wouldn't you know it they gave me back exactly what I gave them? I do not think they were to wedding since there own... hello? prices have gone up. ( One I gave 250.00 in savings bonds and another one I gave 150.00 in a check.) So the one who I gave a savings bond to, mind you I was in graduate school at the time, living hand to mouth, and in her wedding too, halfed the amount of what I gave her! I always gave nice gifts and could not belive it- I am not trying to be petty , becuase I am not a petty person, but .............................................

janwinterbridejoy Posted: Oct 16, 2004 07:58 AM+

janwinterbridejoy MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 6843 WEDDING DATE: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Oct 16, 2004 07:58 AM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Posted by princess99

2 friends in particular that are married, did this to me. So when they had there weddings I gave a very nice gift for the time- one is married 10 years ago , and another 7 years ago. Wouldn't you know it they gave me back exactly what I gave them? I do not think they were to wedding since there own... hello? prices have gone up. ( One I gave 250.00 in savings bonds and another one I gave 150.00 in a check.) So the one who I gave a savings bond to, mind you I was in graduate school at the time, living hand to mouth, and in her wedding too, halfed the amount of what I gave her! I always gave nice gifts and could not belive it- I am not trying to be petty , becuase I am not a petty person, but .............................................

i iknow how you feel my cousin was married 10 years ago and had a sunday afternoon wedding in september. i was 21 then and still worked for my parents catering business and wasnt making much money so my sister and i were each others date and gave 150 which i thought for the type of wedding they had 10 years ago in the am was more then enough. well... 10 years later i was married and they are both sucessful they gave me yep you guessed it 150. im sorry but i beleive in giving what you received unless there was a reason for a smaller gift but 10 years things change.

WeddingsRock Posted: Oct 17, 2004 09:45 AM+

WeddingsRock MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 609 WEDDING DATE: Nov 17, 2001

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 09:45 AM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Dh and I have two weddings this year where the couples gave us NOTHING>>>>>not even a card. Well, I hate to say it, but I REFUSE to give them anything as well. The irony is that everything we see them, they are like 'We know we have to get around and get you something' My response (in my head of course is 'No a$$hole, you missed that boat 3 years ago) I find that people who don't bring a gift AT ALL to be tacky and classless. I try to be as generous as I can at all weddings. FAmily, friends, alike.

christy Posted: Oct 17, 2004 09:51 AM+

christy MEMBER SINCE: 1/02 TOTAL POSTS : 6763 WEDDING DATE: Apr 18, 2003

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 09:51 AM

Re: giving back the same gift?

I always give back the same gift. But I gave a $400 gift in the spring and still never got a thank you card! So, I am annoyed!

Maribelle7777 Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:20 PM+

Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:20 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Give the same amount

If the couple pissed you off why are you going to their wedding?

Maribelle7777 Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:21 PM+

Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:21 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Posted by Stefanie

You know, this is a good question. My friend who was in my wedding party brought a date to my wedding and gave me 150.00. (North Ritz Club~Sunday Night) She also writes me a letter saying...sorry I couldn't give more but I had to pay for the dress too, which was 160.00. THE NERVE OF HER!!! Now her wedding is next month and her BM dresses are 200. plus the shoes~$50, plus I had to pay for part of her shower~ $90, plus her bach party 100 bucks. I guess she's getting what she gave me...150!!!

Actually for a single person I think $150 is adequate and would not even apologize for it.

Maribelle7777 Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:24 PM+

Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:24 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

suven Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:59 PM+

suven MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5958 WEDDING DATE: May 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 01:59 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Posted by Maribelle7777

Posted by Stefanie

You know, this is a good question. My friend who was in my wedding party brought a date to my wedding and gave me 150.00. (North Ritz Club~Sunday Night) She also writes me a letter saying...sorry I couldn't give more but I had to pay for the dress too, which was 160.00. THE NERVE OF HER!!! Now her wedding is next month and her BM dresses are 200. plus the shoes~$50, plus I had to pay for part of her shower~ $90, plus her bach party 100 bucks. I guess she's getting what she gave me...150!!!
Actually for a single person I think $150 is adequate and would not even apologize for it.

? The friend did bring a date.

Considering the costs that you already paid for her wedding, I think that giving the $150 back is VERY generous.

suven Posted: Oct 17, 2004 02:01 PM+

suven MEMBER SINCE: 8/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5958 WEDDING DATE: May 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 02:01 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Posted by Maribelle7777

Give the same amount

If the couple pissed you off why are you going to their wedding?

Just a general question...

june262004 Posted: Oct 17, 2004 10:54 PM+

june262004 MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 12011 WEDDING DATE: Jun 26, 2004

Posted: Oct 17, 2004 10:54 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

Posted by Maribelle7777

Posted by Stefanie

You know, this is a good question. My friend who was in my wedding party brought a date to my wedding and gave me 150.00. (North Ritz Club~Sunday Night) She also writes me a letter saying...sorry I couldn't give more but I had to pay for the dress too, which was 160.00. THE NERVE OF HER!!! Now her wedding is next month and her BM dresses are 200. plus the shoes~$50, plus I had to pay for part of her shower~ $90, plus her bach party 100 bucks. I guess she's getting what she gave me...150!!!
Actually for a single person I think $150 is adequate and would not even apologize for it.

Ditto.

We had older people that 'had' to be invited to our wedding by My DH parents. Even though he nor I had ever met some of them. They gave us 50.00 And that was for a Saturday night wedding in June. I didn't expect any presents from my BM some gave like 100.00 Some gave nothing but u know what they paid for a shower a dress shoes....
I think most people gave 150.00-250.00 People gave what they can give.

saccotobe Posted: Oct 18, 2004 06:19 PM+

saccotobe MEMBER SINCE: 2/03 TOTAL POSTS : 235 WEDDING DATE: Sep 18, 2004

Posted: Oct 18, 2004 06:19 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

just a comment people need to understand both us and our wedding party that it is an expense to be in a wedding party. If you accept to be in the wedding party you accept all the costs along with it. Or at least having a conversation about money at the very start so no one gets upset down the road. I had problems with one bridesmaid and she didn't even give me a gift (added herself to her parents card). My problem was that she put no effort in anything we were doing.

june262004 Posted: Oct 18, 2004 07:58 PM+

june262004 MEMBER SINCE: 1/03 TOTAL POSTS : 12011 WEDDING DATE: Jun 26, 2004

Posted: Oct 18, 2004 07:58 PM

Re: giving back the same gift?

But isnt putting 300.00 towards your wedding enough. I know for me it was. I got 100.00 from two of my cousins who are both married and 150.00 from my MOH who brought a date. That was more then enough I wasn't even expecting that. My best friend who has 2 kids and lives in Vegas came to the wedding didn't give me anything I didn't want anything either I was just happy she was able to come.