Guests who dont give gifts..

Hi,

How do you handle your thank yous for guests who attended the wedding and havent bought you a gift - I know its not about the gift etc etc.....but do I just send a thank you for sharing our day card?

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Posted by Monkeybride

I just thanked them for being there to share our day with us. I figured if there was some mix up about a gift that got lost that would tip them off also without having to ask.

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Same here.

People actually don't give a gift??? I could never attend a party and not give anything. Even if I were broke (which I usually am), I still give something.

I'll have to make a mental note on this and let FH know because I'm sure he'll be upset if this should happen to us.

You don't have to do anything.

Though people sometimes write 'thank you for sharing the day' these are not required.

I think it sounds like you are fishing for a gift.

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Posted by hocus

You don't have to do anything.

Though people sometimes write 'thank you for sharing the day' these are not required.

I think it sounds like you are fishing for a gift.

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I don't agree. I wrote thank yous to people who came to the ceremony, but weren't invited to the reception to say thank you for coming.

The whole thing about a wedding is that even though gifts are expected they are not required.

You are thanking them for attending one of the most special days of your life.

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Posted by simbacat

People actually don't give a gift??? I could never attend a party and not give anything. Even if I were broke (which I usually am), I still give something.

I'll have to make a mental note on this and let FH know because I'm sure he'll be upset if this should happen to us.

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Be prepared - sadly, I think it happens to almost everyone.

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Posted by dpli

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Posted by simbacat

People actually don't give a gift??? I could never attend a party and not give anything. Even if I were broke (which I usually am), I still give something.

I'll have to make a mental note on this and let FH know because I'm sure he'll be upset if this should happen to us.

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Be prepared - sadly, I think it happens to almost everyone.

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Does it? We still haven't rec'd some gifts from guests, but there are also registry items that have been purchased that haven't showed up on our door yet. I am curious - how many of your guests didn't give gifts? Was it 1 or 2 guests or was the number higher? I know that the wedding isn't about gifts, but it does seem tacky for them not to even give a congratulatory card.

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Posted by Nautical bride


Does it? We still haven't rec'd some gifts from guests, but there are also registry items that have been purchased that haven't showed up on our door yet. I am curious - how many of your guests didn't give gifts? Was it 1 or 2 guests or was the number higher? I know that the wedding isn't about gifts, but it does seem tacky for them not to even give a congratulatory card.

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Our number was VERY low - just 4 of 100 guests. One was understandable - family illness with lots of distraction and I was just glad they were there. One was a close family member that promised it was coming, but I think one was a stiff and the other a flake.

It happens to almost everyone I know who has gotten married. We still have not received gifts from about 5-6 people. Its a personal decision but I did not send those people a thank you.

And one person gave us a card and no gift and i gave them a thank you. At least they brought a card.

I always have said my thank you to them was free music, drink, food and favor.

We had one and we just sent them a thank you.

But I won't forget when they get married.....

Yes, it happens.

I would still send a TY saying 'thanks for sharing in our day' or something like that. I don't think it sounds like you are fishing for a gift at all.

I know that most people won't agree with me, but here it comes:

Everyone who attended my wedding brought a gift. Some were very small. But, believe me when I tell you, I would much rather prefer a $20 bill inside a card than NOTHING at all.

Now, here was the issue: I haven't spoken to my father in almost 2 years. So, he did not attend the wedding.

I guess as a way of 'protesting' my decision to not call my father, some of his family members decided to send me empty wedding cards. My grandparents also did this.

I know they were trying to say, 'We're not coming to your wedding, and we're also not giving you a gift because you won't do what we want you to do'

So, I sent them ALL thank you cards. I wrote, 'Thank you for remembering our special day. I cannot believe how fast it came and went. But, all of our hard work and sacrifices were worth it. We had a wonderful wedding and will always cherish the memories of all the happy people who wished us well. And, we will always be so proud of ourselves for being able to provide such a wonderful night for so many people'

I was ABSOLUTELY fishing for gifts. I still CANNOT believe that my GRANDPARENTS sent me an empty card!

eta: YES they could have afforded a $20 check.

i sent them squat! it's also because i had so few ty cards to spare.

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Posted by Lastminute

Hi,

How do you handle your thank yous for guests who attended the wedding and havent bought you a gift - I know its not about the gift etc etc.....but do I just send a thank you for sharing our day card?

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For the most part we did....for a few who were just generally nasty and spiteful, we sent nothing. Probably the wrong thing to do though