AL mentioned to his mom that we'd be house shopping when we move, and his mom told him to buy their house. That they want to get out and get something smaller.
Al's wondering how his siblings would feel about us getting the house, and if anyone would mind us remodeling (of which we would do alot - not because the house is in bad shape, but just to suit our tastes and open up the floor plan)
We're just tossing around the idea, and we'd need to talk details about what $$ they'd want for it, etc. But otherwise I don't know if we'd be able to afford a house that size right now (Colonial, 4 bedroom, 3.5 bath, full basement, 2 car garage), in Commack, in great shape, with a big yard (~an acre of land).
It may be too good a deal to pass up, especially if they're ok with us remodeling. Their mortgage is paid off and I have a feeling we'd get a deep discount, and they'd be so excited to be able to help us out. We could also potentially take out a lower mortgage and just pay his parents the difference directly (as a loan).
hmm, no bidding wars, no endless searching, a great house for a steal - its very enticing. Al mentioned that we'd miss out on the 'romance' () of the house hunt and finding 'our' home, but I think we can experience that making this 'our' home (with endless home improvement projects).
-did I mention my parents live literally around the corner, 5 houses away? I don't think I could live that close to his family, but I think I can with mine.
ok, give me pros and cons to think about...
LisaT
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Re: hmm, in-laws offered us their house...
I don't know how they'd feel about us renovating - its a question of mine, they might not be at all concerned. Its just one of the things we would need to discuss.
As for the siblings, two have houses already. The third wouldn't want the house. But they might feel like we got more then they did. However his parents are 'fair' to the point of it being extreme, so I have a feeling the siblings would get a cash settlement from the sale of the house (or this would count towards Al's inheritance).
Jenny - I don't think there's ANYTHING in that house I'd keep, so his sisters are welcome to it
Alll good things to consider! Thanks for all the advice.
oneday
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Re: hmm, in-laws offered us their house...
Lisa, I have to agree with the majority here - sounds like an awesome deal! Of course you should discuss all the questions you mentioned with them before anything is decided, and probably talk with the siblings just to make sure their would be no hard feelings, but I think it sounds great! Good luck!
Xelindrya
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Posted by oneday
Lisa, I have to agree with the majority here - sounds like an awesome deal! Of course you should discuss all the questions you mentioned with them before anything is decided, and probably talk with the siblings just to make sure their would be no hard feelings, but I think it sounds great! Good luck!
I agree. Good Luck
boosh78201
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Lisa, I had the same problem last week. My inlaws offered to sell us their co-op. Me and hubby had a long talk about it and in the end we decided against it for the following reasons:
1. We would never feel like it was 'our' house. It would always be his parents no matter how much we redecorated.
2. Too many memories for hubby. We felt as a newly married couple we should get our own place and create our own new memories.
Hope this helps.
LisaT
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Re: hmm, in-laws offered us their house...
thanks for your perspective Boosh. Its definitely something we'd have to think long and hard about.
But I don't consider it a 'problem', more an opportunity.
boosh78201
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No problem Lisa. All the best in what you decide!!
ddunne23
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Financially this is probably the break of a lifetime! But i think it comes down to how the family relationships will change if this happens. As you've already mentioned, will his parents be ok with you renovating. Personally, I don't see why they would have a say in the matter if you are now the owners of the house. I see why it would be a concern, but if they were selling it to strangers they could not put any stipulations like that in the agreement. I know it may sound harsh, but I think you will need to approach this with the understanding that you are the buyer and they are the seller, rather than more of an inter-family exchange. But, his parents will have the added perk of sellling it to someone they know will take care of it and the bonus of even being able to spend holidays at their old house. As long as they can cut the cord and not harp on 'when we lived here' then I see no problems! But if at any time you get a gut feeling that maybe down the road your MIL/FIL/SIL/BIL may have some resentment, control issues then I would think long and hard. Because right now a house like that may seem out of reach, but in my opinion no financial opportunity is worth years of anxiety and uneasiness.
shamma
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Good luck Lisa, in whatever you and Al decide. The ladies have pointed out some good things here to consider. I wish you both all the best.
Sassy
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Definitely 100% worth considering. I feel like I would take it and run, but the ladies have given some good points to think about. Good Luck
boosh78201
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Posted by ddunne23
Financially this is probably the break of a lifetime! But i think it comes down to how the family relationships will change if this happens. As you've already mentioned, will his parents be ok with you renovating. Personally, I don't see why they would have a say in the matter if you are now the owners of the house. I see why it would be a concern, but if they were selling it to strangers they could not put any stipulations like that in the agreement. I know it may sound harsh, but I think you will need to approach this with the understanding that you are the buyer and they are the seller, rather than more of an inter-family exchange. But, his parents will have the added perk of sellling it to someone they know will take care of it and the bonus of even being able to spend holidays at their old house. As long as they can cut the cord and not harp on 'when we lived here' then I see no problems! But if at any time you get a gut feeling that maybe down the road your MIL/FIL/SIL/BIL may have some resentment, control issues then I would think long and hard. Because right now a house like that may seem out of reach, but in my opinion no financial opportunity is worth years of anxiety and uneasiness.
totally agree!!
joeslauren
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Re: hmm, in-laws offered us their house...
i think it's an awesome oppotunity for the both of you, and if his parents offered it up, i would go for it. obviously it would also mean having a family discussion, but i think all in all people would rather see the house stay in the family that have it go to complete strangers. good luck and let us know how it unfolds!!!
jlf41
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Re: hmm, in-laws offered us their house...
I can't believe you are moving so soon!! I also think you should do a little house hunting, just to get an idea of how the market is. I have a friend who bought her in-laws house and it has been difficult for her to make it feel her own. You should definetely feel out your in-laws about remodeling and Al's siblings too. I know for my friend, her sisters in law still act like it is their home and it makes it hard for her.
Don't want to sound negative, but just some things to think about. Good luck!
my thought immediately go to the siblings...but it sounds like you guys might be OK...but I still think that if the brother didn't want it...maybe he wants something...
my sister wanted to buy my parents house for a substantial discount...and I was a little pissed...needless to say my parents will never move so it wasn't an issue...
so on one hand I would want to say no...but on the other...how can you pass up such a deal??
(btw...I found a kennel for the dog in SD>..so he doesn't have to come up with us!!! - woo hoo)
Diane
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I say go for it
christy
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This would never happen to me, I say go for it!
LisaT
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we talked to his brother last night. He said if they want to sell it to us at a discount, we should absolutely take it (he has no interest in the house at all).
One down, 2 sisters to go (both have houses already). Then we talk more with the parents...
edited to add: I have a pretty clear understanding of the current housing market. My sister just bought a place and my dad is a real estate appraiser. So that along with you guys and my online house shopping has kept me pretty well informed of the insanity.
dawnie
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Wow..I hope it works out for you. That is a great opportunity!
Sassy
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So far, still sounds good. Keep us posted
farah416
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well, good luck with the siblings! It's funny how people can be about things like houses. My husband's family house has been in the family for 2 generations already, so I don't think any of us could bear to see it go to another family. I know that he would be totally ok if one of his siblings got the house, but not the other (as would I). Bad, huh? But that's human emotion for ya! We love them both but have personal reasons for feeling that way!
It's cool though that the parents are both fair (so in the end the siblings would not feel cheated - hopefully) and respectful of your privacy. It sounds like an ideal situation!
That being said, I am SO JEALOUS of your opportunity. It sounds just like the type of house I want someday! Good luck!!!