How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

Original post by Jax430

Apr 18, 2005 12:39 PM

It struck me yesterday that we have to figure out what to do for mother's day. My parents live on SI, his live on LI. My sister, who also lives on SI, always has a mothers day BBQ with my parents and my BIL's mother, and of course, my nephews. I really don't want to miss that. I don't think DH's family does anything specific, but I know his mom will get insulted if we don't see her that day. She won't let us know she's insulted, but she'll pout and be passive aggressive about it.

The other thing is that my grandma is in a rehabilitation/nursing home, so I feel like my mom is going to be pretty depressed this mother's day, and I should be with my family. I'm tempted for DH and I to split up, but we only have one car, and if we do that now, it will never end.

How is everyone else handling mother's day?

casey31 Posted: Apr 19, 2005 05:56 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

Those of you whose moms don't pressure you are sooo lucky. my mom has been so needy and insecure since i got married- like i am being taken away from her (i'm an only child and we are very close). The thing is, she really likes DH but wants to see us all of the time...it's been hard...she sees mother's day as a time to be ALONE with me- and she even has started in about how i have to make sure to get her a mushy card! I've tried so hard to call her every day and check in...she was upset when we moved to suffolk county- my parents are in bklyn- an hour away- she was a little jealous i think because DH's parents are in suffolk....hopefully it will get better...

stacy&joe Posted: Apr 19, 2005 06:14 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

Posted by casey31

Those of you whose moms don't pressure you are sooo lucky. my mom has been so needy and insecure since i got married- like i am being taken away from her (i'm an only child and we are very close). The thing is, she really likes DH but wants to see us all of the time...it's been hard...she sees mother's day as a time to be ALONE with me- and she even has started in about how i have to make sure to get her a mushy card! I've tried so hard to call her every day and check in...she was upset when we moved to suffolk county- my parents are in bklyn- an hour away- she was a little jealous i think because DH's parents are in suffolk....hopefully it will get better...

Sometimes, it is hard. I have a parent, too, who is prone to using pressure, and it's hard. We just make sure we always talk things out before we approach that parent on anything. With a united front, it's better for us. I hope it gets better for you, too!

janwinterbridejoy Posted: Apr 19, 2005 08:20 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

im very lucky my mil lives in florida so dh and i dont have to split up for the day which is what i think we would do. his mom is a witch and doesnt even send me a card for my b day.

casey31 Posted: Apr 20, 2005 01:16 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

Thank you Stacy! Yes, I hope it gets easier with time as she gets used to me being married. It's been such a balancing act- keeping our marriage safe from intrusion without hurting her feelings!

janwinterbride for having a witchy MIL- that's so hard- glad she is in Florida!

MrsERod Posted: Apr 20, 2005 07:19 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

i so wish i had these options...my mil passed away right before I got to meet her....

suven Posted: Apr 20, 2005 07:46 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

DH only has his mother. So, we are going to take her with us and celebrate with my family.

It's sad because she's the only immediate family that he has- but it makes holidays VERY simple for us! She just comes along when we go to see my family.

hmm8191 Posted: Apr 21, 2005 12:31 PM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

We split up and will continue that until I become a Mom. Then who knows what we'll do.

Jax430 Posted: May 04, 2005 12:27 AM

Re: How are you handling mother's day if you each have mothers who live nearby?

My sister just told us that she's having our family over for a midday BBQ at 2:30. That totally kills whole day and makes it almost impossible for us to do brunch with one mother and dinner with the other, as my family is on Staten Island, and DH's is on LI. DH's family usually goes out to dinner as well.

My grandmother will be out of the rehab center by the end of the week. My mom and dad are going to go see her earlier in the day, at her apartment in Brooklyn. Maybe DH and I can meet them there, skip the BBQ for this year, and do dinner with his family.

I hate dealing with this stuff...holidays are such a pain, and mothers day is a sensitive one when it's the first one since we've gotten married and moved out.