My 9 year old step-child's parents' schedules have changed and now there is a problem of about 15 minutes of down time in the morning. There are 2 options: 1. Bring the kid to before school program (which will cost an additional $200 month) OR 2. Let the kid stay home until it's time to leave for the bus, keeping in mind there is a tenant with children the same age at home.
I'm kind of on the fence here. On the one side, I feel like it's 15 minutes (max) so it is not that big of a deal. It's a mature 9 year old and there will be someone at home downstairs to go to in case there is an emergency.
(We don't want to impose on the tenant b/c they have enough going on without adding another kid to the mix so that isn't an option.)
Then on the other hand, is 9 too young to be at home alone, even if it is only for 15 minutes? I don't need CPS banging down my door over this.
I'm not fully comfortable with the idea but at the same time I feel like it would be okay and it's stupid to pay all that money for before school care for such a short amount of time each morning.
I would like to hear some of your opinions on this.
vmystique33
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Re: How young is old enough?
My daughter is 9 and I wouldnt leave her alone I live in an appartment complex but you would be surprised the things that happen in that amount of time( Alot of tragedies). So I would say way too young!! JMO
AeroJenn
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Re: How young is old enough?
I'm going to say that 9 is probably too young. My parents didnt start leaving me home alone for short periods of time until around 13.
The before school program sounds like it would solve the problem, but I'm sure its an added expense you werent planning on.
Is there anyone else in the neighborhood that he/she takes the bus with? Maybe you can drop your step-child off there for the 15 minutes before they have to catch the bus (if the parents dont mind)?
B22
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Re: How young is old enough?
I would pony up the 200 dollars. At least youhave an option.
9 is too young to leave at home alone. Not only would I be a MESS for those 15 minutes, I wouldnt be able to trust that he get himself to the bus on time, lock the door etc etc.
Maybe you could meet 1/2 way and pay the tennant 100 bucks a month to take care of the kid.
but I would definitely not leave the kid home alone at 9..
ant n tilde
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Re: How young is old enough?
I think 9 is way too young, i wouldn't even consider that until 13
PeteysBride
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Re: How young is old enough?
Posted by AeroJenn
Is there anyone else in the neighborhood that he/she takes the bus with? Maybe you can drop your step-child off there for the 15 minutes before they have to catch the bus (if the parents dont mind)?
I think thats definetly something to look into. I am on the fence because... I student taught and was an aide with 4th graders and they wree the 'gifted' kids and incredibly mature so i'd almost say yes BUT...they also did STUPID SH!T from time to time BECAUSE they thought they were mature and incidents still happened and FAST as I am sure other teachers can tell you. Kids are just that-kids, no matter how mature and God forbid some situation comes up, the parents will always be held responsible because they are underage. That would be a whole other mess and to avoid it I would try and find a happy medium.
I like the friend idea. As you said it IS only 15 minutes so if there is another parent in the area that you would trust with the kid for 15 minutes I woulld go that route and you can always offer to watch the kids on a weekend if she/he needed to go out-helping one another.
Or this is another option.... Is the child's school near a highschool? Or is there a highschooler who is mature in your neighborhood and who'd you trust? I mean a 17/18 year old who babysits. Another option might be if they start school later than your child, to have them pick them up at your house and then walk them to school when its time, espeically if its around the same time they start school so theres no major lag. You can throw them a few bucks which I am sure would be appreciated and they could call you to let you know your stepchild is safe.
TJ22908
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Re: How young is old enough?
I would say its too young. I have a 9 year old niece who is going to be 10 next month and yes she is mature but I don't think she should be left alone. Its not that you only have to worry about the kid but about other people also what if someone sees you leaving him home alone..I don't trust anyone!!
kellybean
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Re: How young is old enough?
I have a nine year old and there is no way hed be home alone. 15 minutes is a long time for a kid to be alone in a home.
CourtandJon
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Re: How young is old enough?
I wouldn't be able to function for the 15 min knowing that anything could happen in that time. Yes, it is only 15 min, but things can go wrong in 5 min, and you just never know. I know $200 a month extra s*cks to have to add to your bills- but if something happened you will have wished that you paid the $- in the end I think it is worth it for peace of mind, you know your child will be safe and unharmed. JMO but I would spend the $ and do the day-care route. I think the fact that you are asking us rather than just leaving the child home for the 15 min shows that you feel uneasy and just want some reasurance that the extra $200 is the right thing to do? I will give you the reasurance that it is not wasted $$- you will be doing the right thing
thelastresort
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Re: How young is old enough?
Thanks ladies.
I am totally not comfortable with the idea of leaving her by herself but DH made me feel like I was being overly cautious. My parents were VERY strict with me so it is hard for me to judge what is normal and what isn't. Thanks for the confirmation that I'm not crazy!
vika111
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Re: How young is old enough?
I think that 9 is old enough to be left alone. My parents left me alone for the whole day (during school vacations) when I was 9 years old. You just have to make sure that rules are being followed (like don't touch the stove, but just watch TV at that time). It's only 15 minutes.
Papillon25
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Re: How young is old enough?
Based on personal experience - I think its too young. I was left home alone ALOT when I was young and looked after a younger sibling. I was always mature and responsible and nothing 'bad' ever happened.
The part people forget about is that it is a lot of responsibility for the child. Nothing bad ever happened but being forced into responsibility too young has definately negatively influenced me.
JMO
Summer07Bride
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Re: How young is old enough?
I think 9 is too young to stay home alone for even just 15 minutes. My little sister is 13 and my parents still prefer someone to be home with her. (Meanwhile when I was her age I was babysitting - go figure)
Aug07OFCbride
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Re: How young is old enough?
I think its worth the 200 for peace of mind.
Cpt2007
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Re: How young is old enough?
agree with the other ladies. 9 is still too young. if it was a 13 or 14 y/o, I might feel differently.
ksl268
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Re: How young is old enough?
I think 9 yrs. old is too young to be left home alone, even if it is just 15 minutes. I have a 9 year old brother and a 10 year old cousin, both of which are mature for their ages, however they are kids. They may not intentionally do anything to harm themselves or anyone else but accidents do happen and kids are curious. For the peace of mind I do the morning program.
SylvieB
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Re: How young is old enough?
I have a 9 yr old and we had this problem in the morning when she moved up to 3rd grade. I agree w/ the other girls, its too young. DH worked his schedule so that he goes in later and he puts her on the bus.
