i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

I have no idea what’s happening in this picture, but it’s awesome. Is that a giant hawk swooping down to snack on a rodent or something in the background? The bride looks like she’s being chased by her worst nightmare. Even her hands are balled into little fists. You can’t stage a picture like this.



























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If you're a guy, don't try to save time by peeing while brushing your teeth. The back and forth really throws off your aim. #LFMF
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Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shiiit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered 'maybe'. FML
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Today, I was woken up to my family surrounding me with breakfast in bed and sweet 16 balloons. My birthday is in 3 months, and I will be 17. FML
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Today, I was having a bad day at work. Then, on my coffee break, a little boy walked up to me and told me I was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. I'm a boy. FML
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Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML.
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Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
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Today, while at my boyfriends place, I thought I would be nice by folding his laundry and putting it away since he was working late. I opened his sock drawer and sitting on top was a photo of his mother, naked. FML
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Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML
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Today, my parents, not trusting me and my boyfriend, told us to call them in the middle of our movie so they could hear it, and prove we weren't up to no good. Well, I called. Just as a raging sex scene started. FML
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Today, I was walking to bed in fancy panties and a tight black tank top. My husband exclaimed, 'This is the best part about being a grown up!' He was talking about the ice cream he was eating in bed. FML
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Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML
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(530):

We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
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(856):

we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said ' we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon'
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(219):

ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
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(321):

I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
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(303):

dude they had a 'sorry for partying' wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
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(403):

Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.

(1-403):

I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
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(780):

She passed out in the backyard, making 'face down' snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
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You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
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(724):

This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
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(914):

She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
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(603):

sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
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(+61):

She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
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(828):

Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says 'use protection' on the snow penis
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(215):

OMG the post office opened my dildo! 'we sincerely regret the damage to your package'
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(303):

Emergency need house key where r u I just got siht o n
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(484):

we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
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(845):

Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning 'I know you mark that **** up! I work in retail!'
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the end

Re: i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

Re: i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

of course I love this one

Re: i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

the sun and moon one had to be fake...

Re: i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

isn't that the bride's boquet behind her?

Re: i could use some TUESDAY HAHA's 2*1*11

def LOLed a few times