Need Advice!!!! (kind of long)- UPDATE!

DH and I got married in October, and bought our first house about few months ago. We gave everyone in our family a key to let them know that our house is always open to them (as long as they call first).
About 2 weeks ago my mom and younger brother got into a really big fight and she basically told him to leave. (Not really sure of the particulars) Being that my brother was left with little option, (he just graduated from college in May, and doesn't start his job until September) we took him in. At first DH was thrilled, but now I can tell that DH is getting slightly irritated because we were already pinching pennies to begin with, now we have to accommodate my younger brother by buying 1/3 more food, and the utilities have been altered a little bit.
DH says things EVERYDAY like 'when is your brother going to start looking for an apartment' or 'How much longer is your brother going to be here'. I feel terrible. My brother was just kicked out!!!! What am I supposed to do?
The job that my brother starts in September requires him to be trained down in Virginia for 5 weeks. DH and I will continue to open our door to him until he leaves for VA, but once he comes back DH would like to ask him to pay for some things if he can't manage to find an apartment.
We have both somewhat pried to figure out whether or not he will be looking for an apartment after he finishes training. He has been looking a little, but not really actively.
What should we do? I would hate to try to push him out so soon after my mom kicked him to the curb, but we really can't afford to have him live with us for a year, never mind the fact that our privacy level has definitely changed. I also feel weird charging him rent because that will just make it that much harder for him to save for an apartment.
Any suggestions? Sorry SOOO LONG

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I bet you'd be surprised if you took your brother to the side and asked if he chip in for groceries/toilet paper/necesseties b/c you can't afford it. Also, see if he could help around the house.....

You might just find out he'd be willing to help out......

Good Luck!

I am sure it must be hard on you guys being that you are still newlyweds and need your alone time.. But this is your family and you have to do what's right..
In the end though, once he starts working, and getting himself settled, while he's looking for an apartment, make sure he's giving even a little to help you guys out.. it's only fair.. Good Luck

I can just imagine your situation. I am very close to my younger brother & their has been times that DH says that he feels like we have a kid. We used to help him out alot, but now he had a better job, he actually has been helping us out.
I'll keep you all in my Prayers.

Is there anyway your brother can help with the $$ in any way?? I know he has to save for an Apt...Maybe you can talk to your Mom?? Is is not fair for you guys..esp being Newlyweds.

I wish I could help you some more.

Sorry you have to deal with something like this after your wedding, but you are a great sister and you have a wonderful husband offering to let him stay there, I can understand where your husband is coming from, but Im sure if you took your brother out to lunch one day with just you and him and spoke to him about the situation, you would be surprised at how he would help with things and contribute. Tell him you need rent after he comes back if he dosent find and apartment and in the mean time if he could help out with the yard and things around the house, it would be a great help and feel like he was contributing to the household. Im sure it will all work out fine, its a hard place to be in, but you are a great sister, thats whats family is for right, but you have to lay down the law with him at this time so it dosent continue to much further. Im sure he is appreciative of you both....Good luck with everything

This is really tough....and so personal its hard to say.
I don't have a brother but I'm sure that if I did, I'd do the same thing that you did. How could you not?

On the other hand, you have a husband now, and he needs to be respected. I can understand how he might be getting very frusterated.

I can also understand where it must be hard to ask your little brother for money for food, chipping in, etc. I know that he's an adult....but he's your younger brother, too.

Again, this is totally personal....but in that situation I might have a talk with both of them, and set a 'time limit' Since he is leaving anyway, that shouldn't be too hard.
This way, your DH will feel better knowing that there is an end in sight, and you can also accomodate your brother and not feel guilty about asking him to leave.

Hey girls thanks a lot for your suggestions!! DH and I have decided that once my little bro comes back from VA and starts working we will all sit down and discuss a realistica plan. Until then we will just eat the expence. He's a good kid and we enjoy having him around he and I have always got along really well and DH finally feels like he has a brother
Thank you so much!