Need your help re: wedding gift.

Hi Ladies!

Okay, so here is my scenario.

I met a fellow Raphael Bride several months ago through a mutual friend. We completely hit it off and have become very close, very quickly. The nice people about Raphael, when they found out we were buddies, told us we could come to each others weddings, free of charge. Her and her husband came to our day, and were so appreciative, complimentary, and had a blast.

The clincher: They gave us a card with $250. I was shocked, and didn't expect anything at all from them. It is very generous considering we are new friends, and considering we didn't pay for her or her FH's plate.

Now, I am going to her wedding next month (alone). I don't know how much to give them.

Our financial situations are very different. They are slightly older than FH and I and are successful at what they do, live in Manhattan, etc etc. FH and I are artists with a very low income.

I can't match their gift. FH says we should give them something off the registry totaling about $150 (all we can handle right now with us MOVING two days after the wedding!)

I know to give them $250 would be like just neutralizing the whole situation, but our wedding money is in a CD already, and we both stopped working and have no income right now!

What would you do?

Thank You!

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

I can't match their gift. FH says we should give them something off the registry totaling about $150 (all we can handle right now with us MOVING two days after the wedding!)

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I think this would be fine but JMO.

I had a similar situation sorta, a guy DH & I worked with for 10 years, came to our wedding solo and gave us $250 (he is well off).

When we were invited to his wedding, I knew I could not double that and ended up spending about $300 off their registry (purchased their bedding & a photo album).

I think your gift is fine, it's the thought that counts.

Plus they aren't paying for your plate. Also they seem to better off financially than you and DH so it all evens out.

Their $250 is the same as your $150, like when the little old aunt that is on SS gives you $50, that is a lot of $$ to her

I think you should give the gift, and not worry about it.
If they are truly your friends, which sounds like they are, they would understand (knowing your financial situation and all).

I would do the registry option and not worry about matching their gift.

Or better yet, since you are artistic, you might consider either drawing or painting a picture that you could frame and give them as your gift, or include a hand-painted card with your registry gift. It would be very personal and meaningful and you can't place a dollar value on that!

Good luck!

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Posted by Boop2704

If you are going solo, I would say even $125 is good. When DH and I go to a wedding, we always gie $250 and if I go solo I give half of that.

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I agree

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Posted by Boop2704

If you are going solo, I would say even $125 is good. When DH and I go to a wedding, we always gie $250 and if I go solo I give half of that.

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This is a great suggestion. Good friends of ours who came to the wedding are very low income, and they made us an incredibly thoughtful and beautiful gift - sometimes that really does mean alot!

Thanks ladies...I think I am going to give them a Gift Caertificate to one of the restaurants in the group I work for. I think I also might frame their invitation, cause I know they love it!

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

I think I also might frame their invitation, cause I know they love it!

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YES!!!! One woman hand stitched a copy of our invite and framed it. That's the most precious and thoughtful gift I've ever received!!!!

We have it on the wall. Every time my mom visits, she still comments on what a thoughtful gift it was.

eta to add pic

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Posted by Donna


Their $250 is the same as your $150, like when the little old aunt that is on SS gives you $50, that is a lot of $$ to her

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I agree.... and think its a good idea to get something off the registry...

.....on the note of invitations.... my IL's received a wedding gift of their invitation, with a beautiful outdoor setting watercolor painted on it, and framed with mat........ it looks so pretty in their hallway.......

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Posted by suven

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

I think I also might frame their invitation, cause I know they love it!

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YES!!!! One woman hand stitched a copy of our invite and framed it. That's the most precious and thoughtful gift I've ever received!!!!

We have it on the wall. Every time my mom visits, she still comments on what a thoughtful gift it was.

eta to add pic

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Wow! How lovely...okay, you sold me. I'm going to do something with their invite and give $125. Thanks suven!

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

Wow! How lovely...okay, you sold me. I'm going to do something with their invite and give $125. Thanks suven!

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