Need Your Opinions - Updated

Original post by wood2be

Apr 03, 2005 11:50 PM

DH's parents, 2 sisters and their SO's received invitations to a neighbors wedding over a month ago. The wedding is in 2 weeks. The parents of the bride were invited and came to ours in October. (Actually, they invited themselves therefore, making us invite ALL of his parents neighbors.) Today my MIL calls DH to tell him that the parents have now extended the invitation to the two of us. So, I guess we were on the B or C list even though the rest of his family was on the A list. I kind of understand, I wouldn't have done that to any family, but we do live out of state.

I really didn't think anything of it, but my Mom and two of my friends think it is 'disgraceful' and all agreed that we should have declined. Especially since it's two weeks away. DH doesn't think there is anything wrong with it.

I am interested in seeing if what people outside of the family thinks. Any thoughts?

Bumsie Posted: Apr 12, 2005 10:12 AM

Re: Need Your Opinions

Posted by Kee

I don't understand why people get so offended about being a b or c list invite. It has happened to me and husband a number of times. It is always with people that we aren't really close to, but who would want us to be there if they could. We had some constraints for our wedding and I did invite a few people close to the wedding, not because they weren't important, but because we had to invite the obligatory family members and parent's friends etc. When we were able to include the additional people I truly wanted them to be there and am so glad they came. Sometimes I find younger people more understanding than my mom's friend who would of flipped if she didn't get an invite, but I have only met twice in my life. I'm not trying to stir the pot, but I truly don't think people think of b or c listers as after thoughts.
Anyone agree or am I alone on this one?

I agree with this. I would also give them the benefit of the doubt that it may have been a misunderstanding that I wasn't formally invited before. Just leave it up to DH to decide and if you go just have a blast.

Blu-ize Posted: Apr 12, 2005 12:13 PM

Re: Need Your Opinions

Nope, deal breaker. I would decline and send a gift. That's what they wanted anyway.

wood2be Posted: Apr 12, 2005 12:49 PM

Re: Need Your Opinions

OK, this is the story I got.

There are many 'kids' in their neighborhood (37 and I'm still considered a kid ) So, when each one gets married, they invite all the parents and if it's a girl, they only invite the girls, and vice versa. That is why DH's two sisters were invited and not us. We only invited the Parents to ours. Apparently, the FOB had second thoughts and said we had to be invited.

I guess it works for all of them, so who am I to question? To me, it sounds very grade schoolish. Perhaps, that is why the MOB called my MIL and asked her to extend the invitation to us instead of doing it herself!

DH really wanted to go, so I agreed and we will be going to Boston this Friday. I did have to promise not to drink, for DH's fear of me saying something like 'glad we could make it on such short notice'. He knows me too well