Len seems to think now that I am a wife I should cook and clean all the time, we've already begun to argue. I say a Good Wife is one who shows support, love and works together with her husband to keep the house, expenses, etc. . . A good wife is not synonomous to Slave.
What do you all think makes a GOOD WIFE?
Mary
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
In these days of dual-income family, such gender-defining roles are outdated. If the woman's career is a housewife, then I do agree that her responsibility should be cooking and cleaning. However, if the women works outside the home, the chores should be shared.
Sassy
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Mary I feel the same way. If both are working, both come home tired, there should not be any caveman attitude.
Seriously tho' if I were a housewife, I'd clean and cook every day. But not while I work a full time job and especially drive 100 miles/day.
Samanthas Mom
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
a good wife is supportive of her DH besides cook and clean and does the little things like go to the dry cleaners, etc........ I know DH appreciates that b/c he has so little time off
LizD
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Liz- I agree with you. If both are working, then why should only 1 have to do everything else at the home as well. It should be a partnership.
My DH made pasta the other night and just put the dishes/pots in the sink, did not rinse. I told him, if it is too hard to clean (pasta sticks), I will start throwing them away and buying new stuff all the time!!!.. well he got off his but and washed his dishes. We are making progress, but it's slow
natasha
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Liz: I agree with you 100%. However, I sometimes find myself falling into doing all of the housework. When that happens, I definitely let him know so that he can do his part.
Sassy
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
DH had me sorting the laundry last night, while he was watching HBO !!!!! I said something is soooo wrong w/this picture.
But the joke is on him, he will DO the laundry today and I will be watching Paradise Hotel and scanning pics for Tammy/05
jlf41
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
I think I even resent the idea of a 'good wife!!' My DH and I are more like partners, our roles are pretty fluid and flexible. My DH jokes around calling me wifey and asking when dinner is going be on the table... In reality, he does most of the housework- laundry, cleaning, dishes, food shopping. I cook and keep things straightened up. But that's just how things work for us now. My DH is not traditional at all- which is good because that is far from how I operate. I will most likely be the bigger money maker in the future, and he is psyched about that. He does what he loves, and I do what I love and as it turns out what I do brings in more money. He wil likely be the parent at baseball games and running the carpool and he can't wait. Every couple works out a system that fits their respective lives. What's important is that both people are comfortable with it. Make those guys do the dishes ladies!!!
HeatherandNick
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Liz - I agree with you! I only work part-time, so days I am off I will gladly do my 'wifely duties', however, after I come home from work it is a 50-50 thing. Nick is very good about this too.
jennbaby
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
My DH does most of the cooking, I cook on some nights but he does most times, because he enjoys it & he kicks ass at it!
I clean. Why? Because I know if he did, it wouldn't get done right & I like my house kept a certain way. CLEAN!
We share other things like garbage, etc.
We send the laundry out to be done & we put it away together.
I don't mind doing whatever I do here, he pays almsot all the bills and pays all the rent so I feel lucky
Sassy
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LOL, garbage in our home is off limits to me. I refuse. YUCKY
joeslauren
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Yes - 50/50 at all times if both are working all day. Joe and I work very different hours so we really do help each other out. On his days off, he cooks / cleans, laundry, etc... and I do the same one the weekends. We try to make it fair as possible He gets one extra day off every other week so sometimes it even works out that he does more of the household stuff than I do. I don't mind that of course!
stacedz
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Cleaning seems to be a never ending battle with Gary and I, I do MOST of it and I have to ask him to do things, I wonder when he will ever just pick up his clothes on the bed or after himself!?!?! When we clean together on a Saturday, he always asks me what has to be done? I say don't you live here, you SHOULD know! I almost regret that he didn't have an apt before we moved in together because I think that would have shown him what to do. He does cook since I get home later and I know a lot of friends that their hubbies won't even try, I enjoy cooking and wish I had more time for it.
I think there is no such thing as a good wife, it is a good relationship, because there would be no wife without a husband...
Sassy
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Oooh, very good point stacey
Scoop
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a good wife and a good husband will always communicate, compromise and commit to eachother.....the three big C's.
kmcwed
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A good wife is her husband's best friend. She's supportive, encouraging, understanding and fair. She takes her commitment seriously.
A good wife is not a slave. You're right Liz!!
A marriage is a partnership. You're not supposed to be your husband's caretaker and mommy!
My DH is great. If I cook, he does the dishes without me asking. He also volunteers to cut the onions or peel potatoes. He carries the heavy laundry baskets around, and basically helps me out with all the household stuff. I usually go into the bedroom to find the bed already made! He's been on his own since he's 20, so I think that makes a difference. He's used to taking care of himself.
I have no complaints. Yet.....
Latina511
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
You are 100% right Liz.
If Enzo was to ever tell me that seriously it would be the end of him...LOL
He sometimes jokes around and laughs but he knows that those were the old days when women use to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.
ddunne23
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
I ask my DH everyday if I can stay home and I will have dinner ready for him every night! But until that day it is 50/50. I cook he cleans. I clean inside he takes care of outside. We each do our own laundry still. He is very good about it. He is very traditional and grew up in a home where his dad walked through the door and the first thing he said was 'what's for dinner.' I sometimes kindly remind him that I am not your mother, your cook or your maid!
Sassy
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
Thanks ladies, it's nice to know that I'm not crazy. We've lived together doing everything 50/50 for over a year now. Then there are things that only I do or only he does. Like only I make the bed (he's awful at it) Only he takes out the garbage (as I said b4 - yucky LOL) Only I handle the finances.
But for cooking /cleaning it's always been even, and now all of a sudden I'm his wife, and he wants it to be 95/5 Not with me
Samanthas Mom
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Re: QOTD - Wed, July 2nd...........
he does the manly outdoors thing and garbage, I dont trust him to clean LOL I would have to re do it
He helps me vacuum sometimes to get done quicker, since we hav two vacuums, Ill do some rooms and assign him others
