Starting an Aquarium 101 (long)

At the request of JennRenee, I am going to share with you all my on-going saga of my DH's quest to become, as Michelle W calls it, 'King Neptune'.....

Ok, it all started last week at the San Gennaro Feast when I won a goldfish, I appropriately named 'Chooch'. Winning Chooch made me a bit happy (after the week from hell we all know I had), but Joe was totally beside himself about this fish. He told me to give it back or give it to my friend, but when I almost started crying, he gave in. He didn't want to keep the fish because he felt that we'd get all attached to it and then it would die, as we know goldfish are known to do so soon after getting them.

Let's move on to the next night -- our friends asked us to 'fishsit' their 2 fish that they had won at the feast -- 'Bada' and 'Bing' (wouldn't guess any of us are Italian or Soprano fans, now would you? ) Well, on Friday morning Joe wakes me up when he's leaving for work at 6AM to tell me that one of their fish is DEAD!! DO YOU BELIEVE THIS??? We don't even have them for 10 hours and THEY HAVEN'T EVEN LEFT THE NEIGHBORHOOD YET!!! I tell him that the fish is sleeping, which is exactly what I was trying to do, but that's all a dream at this point. So I check the fish, and lo and behold, there is Bada or Bing dead as a doornail on the bottom of the bowl. And it justs keep getting worse, because at 2AM Joe wakes me up to tell me that CHOOCH DIED!!! Well, this just sent my husband over the edge because this was the reason he didn't want to get the fish in the first place. So now he decides (and here is where I get to my aquarium story) we're going to set up his tank and start a 'real' aquarium. And then on Sat around 11:30 I see Bada gasping for air, only to find him dead a half-hour later. Nice weekend, huh?

I will never fishsit again!!! I went out and bought our friends 2 new ones and I'm happy to say that as of today (knock wood), they're still around and I can't wait to give them back tonight!!! LOL :)

Now to my saga.....

Joe used to have a tank set up about 10 years ago, so he drags me to the basement to get all the stuff out. So up comes the tank, the stand (another disagreement about that old thing) and all the accessories. He takes out the gravel and it's PINK. Not just PINK, but NEON FROM THE 80s/90s PINK!!!!! WTH?????? Not for nothing, but my DH is Mr. Ionlywearblack, so that floored me. I wanted to get gravel that matches my livingroom, but no, we have to use this. Now please tell me, not to offend anybody who has a pink aquarium, but what bottom of the ocean do you know of is PINK???? Last time I went snorkeling, it was blue and green!!!!!

Ok, the pink aquarium, mixed with purple now, is up and running and getting filtered, etc. and is absolutely 100% CLEAR water. I come home Monday night to a 100% CLOUDY/MILKY tank with him all in a tizzy about what a day he had!!!! What the $#@! happened? He changed the pink/purple gravel to natural-colored coral for the sicchilids (sp?) he wants to get and told me it would get clear in a couple of hours. What ever you say honey.

Mind you, almost $80 later, we still have no fish and have changed this tank twice. I come home last night to find, are you ready, NO TANK, NO WATER, NO GRAVEL, NO CORAL, NO NOTHING -- BLANK SPACE WHERE THE TANK USED TO BE!!!!! I very calmly turned around and said 'Baby, what happened to the tank?' -- as I'm looking all over the floor to see if the tank exploded, nope. My poor husband looked like a wildman and just asked me to hug him because he needed a hug! Then I see the tank, empty as can be, on the kitchen table. Joe, what happened? Well it seems he called Fishtown to ask why the tank was still cloudy and since he didn't trust them, he then had to call Petland to double-check. So another trip to Petland and we started all over again.

And still no fish......

This whole thing was supposed to be to relax me and calm me down. I'm a nervous wreck because I have no clue what the heck I'm going to go home to tonight!!! God I love that man of mine!!!!

Thanks for listening to my never-ending saga!

That is the funniest story i EVER heard of!!!

We had an aquarium once, my Dh's BRIGHT idea.. well he puts the tank under a window, and since i am no marine biologist i dont know your not supposed to do that!! Well the tanks gets all GREEN, and when i say green i mean green. so he goes to the store and gets this algea eater, the not so bright guy at the pet store says this will clear it up, and my not so bright husband forgets to tell the guy its goldfish, and apparently algea eaters SUCK on to goldfish like leaches!! needless to say our pretty fancy goldfish died as a result, and since the tank is so green (from the sun comming in the window) this algea eater is getting so big that i am actually afriad to walk past the tank!!! then the water gets so green that we cant see in it anymore, and he promises every night that 'tomorrow night' i will clean it out i promise. Well a week goes by and i start to smell something fowl, so I bleach the fridge, clean the cabinets and bleach the garbage pail. Well the smell is still there, and i find out that its this GIANT dead algea eater (who proably died from overeating) is laying in the tank.. well after that i made him throw away EVERYTHING and we are not getting fish EVER again!! LOL.. i would love a salt water tank, but i still have nightmares about that damm algea eater!!
I once won a goldfish from the italian feast in Frankin Square, that fish was alive for a year, that was prehusband time!!! LOL...

Thanks Suzanne, your's was pretty funny also! And thanks for the heads up on the algae eaters because my DH has already mentioned that he wants to get some of them. Oh joy of joys, what I have to look forward to. And to think, this was all my big idea!! My OB/GYN has 2 tanks in the office and when he came w/me, I told him how I like them and how they are so relaxing!!!! Maybe they're relaxing when they aren't in your own home!! LOL :)

oh geez, that for telling about that! I didn't know, not that there is any room in there for more than one fish, but good to know!

LOL

Deb you are too funny, I will consult with King Neptune and see what he reccomends. You can have a beta in your tank with other fish, just make sure they are non-aggressive. Some types that we have had success with and aren't too expensive are tetra's, molly's, & kissing fish(buy them in pairs). When you go to the pet store just look at all the fish in the non-aggresive section

Deb, you have such a way with words!! I'm dying laughing all over again! I just got home from our refinancing, and got horribly car sick, which I'm not over yet, so now I'm trying not to laugh too hard because I don't want to vomit on my keyboard!

Ask King Neptune what sicchlids are! I'm assuming they are the aggressive ones, since Jaques Costeau calls them 'nasty'. Oh dear God, what have I gotten myself into?

I always get car sick ~ just one of the hazards of being me, coupled with the fact that Patrick loves any opportunity to practice his 'high speed highway chase' skills in MY 260 horsepower 0-60 in 3 seconds car! Men...

LOL

Jenn, that is too funny!!!

Did you ever notice when YOU have somewhere to go they drive normal, but when it for them ie., movie, sporting event etc, they drive like a qualifying heat for the Indy 500?

Not only that Michelle, but if it's for me, sometimes he takes the MOST roundabout route and cruises along like he's got all the time in the world! SHEESH!

I'm piping in here....

When I first started dating Joe, he drove like Grandma Moses -- slower then ****. Now all of a sudden he drives like he's in the Daytona 500 and I sit there screaming and holding on for dear life while threatening to get the **** out of the car and never to get in ever again! I don't know what the heck happened, but he's a friggin madman. And ever since he got the Jetta, he CANNOT and WILL NOT let any type of VW pass him on the road -- it's like a race. You can't even talk to him, he looks like a maniacal nut!

But when I drive, I have to hear all sorts of comments on how I drive. Not for nothing buddy, but there's nothing wrong with the way I drive and I'm a defensive driver (even if I am a speed demon), but he's a friggin aggressive driver and thinks everyone sees him and will watch out for him.

And don't get me started on how whenever I have to go somewhere, he drives like a snail or is CONSTANTLY late! I swear he takes more time when he knows I have an appointment. Like tonight, how much you want to bet, he'll be late to pick me up and I'll either just make it to the dr or be late????

Ok, I'm done now.

My DH is another one that can join that club! Hes a lunatic on the road, whenever we go somewhere, he can NEVER EVER stay in one lane.,. nooooooo its gotta be a race and we must weave in and out of traffic...and if that wasnt bad enough we must listen to HIP HOP music (which im not a big fan of) blasting so everyone else in Nassau county can hear it..
thats not even the worst! WHENEVER! we go somewhere, no matter what, he gets us lost, one time we could actually see giants stadium but he just couldnt get there, we turned around and went home. Another time we were going to lake george (where we go like a million times a year) and he has to ask the toll booth guy where to go, so the guys says this way that way right left.. and my DH actually looks at me as hes driving away and says 'what did he say?' i was stunned i didnt know weather to explode or have him checked out by a dr.. needless to say that whenever we are going somewhere of a far distance, there is for sure going to be at least one argument before we ever get there!!!

Didn't you know that men lack the direction gene? My husband has been going up to his mother's house in the Poconos for, what 13 years before I came along? I know my way around and he is still clueless!! I don't think he ever knew how to get to Long Island until I came along and he still asks me 'are you sure'!!! I can find my way out of a paper bag, but my beloved, unfortunately cannot!!! And the best is how he'll drive like Mario Andretti and won't know where he's going and then he'll turn to me and say 'which way' -- um, we were supposed to make that left that you blew past at 90 mph, but don't worry, I'll figure it out!

As for musical selection, my husband still thinks he's 16 and BLASTS Ozzy and Black Sabbath to the point where I'm going to throw up if I have to hear that drooling nimcompoop one more time!!!!!

Deb I have to learn not to read your posts while I'm drinking... after the drooling nincompoop remark I spewed iced tea all over my monitor!!!!

For the record Patrick has an excellent sense of direction, and can't seem to comprehend that even though I GREW UP ON LONG ISLAND, I can't find my way to unknown places without directions. You can name any town in the Tri-State area and he can get there on a hunch. I can only find major malls and shopping centers. Anything else, I need explicite directions, and that baffles him. Uh, Hello? I think I'm the normal one, not HIM!

Jen, I am peeing over here!!!! You remind me of my best friend -- she always accuses me of making her spit or blow her nose or some such nonsense when I say something!!! Your poor monitor today, throw up, ice tea, what next? LOL :)

You, my dear friend, are suffering from the same thing my cousins that live by you suffer from!! It must be the area, because once you put them out of Suffolk County, they are lost!!! Meanwhile, the Queens chick over here, knows my way around there better then they do!!! It's quite funny! I can find my way out there no problem (take the Northern State all the way til it ends and bam, you're there), but for some reason, the parkway doesn't seem to exist for them to drive to me -- it only works for me to drive back home. It's magical, you see, and appears only when I need to go home!!! When they had to come in for my sister's shower, I can't tell you how many of them got lost! It's amazing! LOL :)

Jen, my dear, I will give you directions anytime you want!!!! The only place I am direction illiterate is Manhattan -- DO NOT ask me how to get around here. I just know what train stop to get off and where to go from there, any variations, and I'm totally lost myself! I'm also train retarded -- I'll stand there for hours if I have to until my train goes back in service.