The In-Laws

After answering RVCBrides post about how often do you see your in laws, I was wondering...how many of you out there have good relationships with your inlaws? Take this time to Vent or praise them if you like!! It helps!

With my case, my MIL hates me. She hasn't said so in so many words...she actually did say before we got married that she didn't think our marriage would last and that she hoped it wouldn't. Then just last summer she said in Spanish infront of DH,and I to her sister that she was jealous of the relationship he had with me, that she used to be the only woman in his life...GROSS!!!
I am just glad they live in GA!

I get along GREAT with all of them..... MIL,FIL, SIL, BIL & 2 nieces

one BIL passed away 9 months after my wedding

I'm happy to say that I get along really well with all my IL's. Extended family too, so it's a real pleasure.

Also makes living with my MIL & FIL alot easier.

Personally, I adore my husband's family. I have been welcomed into their family since we first started dating and I think they are wondeful people. I started that post because I was curious to see where other people were at regarding hanging with the in-laws.

I of course have bumped heads with my MIL and we've had our share of tension. However, I've realized a huge lesson when it comes to my mother in law and that is I will never change her and her ways. Bottom line is she loves her son, and so do I, so battling with her most of the time is pointless. You must pick your battles very wisely.

As long as your husband sticks up for you regardless and always has your back, try to be patient and let things roll off your shoulder when it comes to his mother. It's best for your husband and more importantly for your marriage.

This is a very touchy subject for me.....

I love my ILs most of the time, they are very generous people with great hearts and we love each other very much. My family gets along great with them as well, we have shared holidays together too.....

Then comes the flipside. DH hasn't yet learned that he can't always take his family's side......we have huge battle EVERY holiday because both families want it their way. It caused such a huge strain on our 1 month old marriage and our holidays were tension filled, so much to the point that I was not going anywhere, but staying home by myself......

I hate the holidays because of this very reason and don't think there will ever be peace and harmony, nor any sharing from anyone... All my new china will never get used at this rate....

Sorry to vent, but I just can't handle that anymore, and really don't look forward to the holiday seasons anymore because of it.....

Gina, that's awful. I'm so sorry you had to spend the holidays alone at home. One would think that once you decided to do that they'd pull their heads out of the sand and make some compromises.

::raises hand:: I'm one of the brides who answered 'Despise them'. I can't stand people who are so unsupportive of one son while they give the other one anything and everything he needs. I can't stand a woman who cuts her son off and then scoffs at assistance from others, saying 'What, did they think you didn't have family?'. I *really* can't stand people who constantly put their son down when he's done absolutely NOTHING to warrant it.

So no, I don't like my ILs.

Gina,
I am soo sorry for you too. In our family the holidays haven't been a problem, since I am Jewish and he is catholic. Just Thanksgiving gets tricky, too much food.
I also feel for Princess Rose, I have the same situation. My MIL said to my husband, ' You can do 99% right and I will always pick on the one percent you did wrong' How could a woman say that to her son??
I have found it extremely helpful to leave the room when I can, if she comes in. If not, I just grin and bear it.
The most important thing is to have your husband on your side. It took a while for my DH to realize that his mom would never accept him for who he was, but things got so much better after he did.
Unfortunately my good friend is on the verge of a divorce due to her husband not seeing things from her point of view when dealing with the inlaws!
Thanks for opening up ladies...I was begining to feel like I was the only one with in law problems!!!
Luv Ya all!

Wow Squirt, I feel bad for your friend, and I fear that sometimes DH defends his family a little too much sometimes. I always point out the flaws in my own family, but he can't see past the 'perfectness' of his own.
I particularly have a distaste for his sister who 'stole' my wedding thunder with her pregnancy, constantly drawing the attention to herself. It was pretty sickening, and no I'm not jealous or exaggerating.....
Then the holidays came and it was my turn to host Christmas Eve (his mom's suggestion to take turns to be fair), and that got changed to SIL's house, because afterall 'this year is about the baby and whatever we can do to make it easier for SIL so she doesn't have to travel'... RIIIIIIIGHT, 'cuz next year when the baby is a toddler, you are really gonna wanna schlep him out.....they'll pull it again this year though, I'm sure. And I'll be on a plane to Mexico to spend Christmas in the sun!!!!

ETA: I didn't end up spending the holidays alone, I set his mother straight about her son being a pain and that I wasn't one to be pushed around. I went to SIL's for dinner and ended up cooking almost everything myself anyway!!!!! SHoulda just had it at my house to begin with......

It's funny you should say that your SIL stole your thunder from your wedding day by being pregnant....mine did to! Sad, but funny how we have soo much in common!
My SIL actually stole her older sisters thunder when she ran away from home two days before her wedding, then came back. Then stole her thunder AGAIN when she permantely moved out the day her sister went in for an emergancy C-section. She was only 17. Then she gets pregnant right before our wedding,we had to drop her from the wedding party, and it was the first time anyone in our extended family had seen or heard from Cheryl since she left home four years earlier! I made it a point to ignore her the whole day
I TOTALLY KNOW HOW YOU FEEL....MY heart goes out to you
My DH and I just decided to move to Florida, so luckily we won't be near any of his close family.
Hey anytime you wanna vent or chat, Forum Mail me!

For the most part i love them and we all get along. They are extremely generous and loving.

However, I think they are really judgemental of my family, and that bothers me. I made the horrid mistake of being open about my family's dysfunctions to them (the little dysfunctions - the ones that ALL families have) and they have made it a point to comment on those things. I now have to forever defend and praise my family around them. They think they are the PERFECT family, and that gets extremely annoying, because they are not. I love them, but after about 48 hours i am ready to leave. Luckily, my DH knows they re not perfect and can get just as annoyed as me about it.

I know my parents are not a cake-walk to deal with either, he has his issues with them as well. So, it is balanced.

::raises hand:: I'm one of the brides who answered 'Despise them'. I can't stand people who are so unsupportive of one son while they give the other one anything and everything he needs. I can't stand a woman who cuts her son off and then scoffs at assistance from others, saying 'What, did they think you didn't have family?'. I *really* can't stand people who constantly put their son down when he's done absolutely NOTHING to warrant it.

So no, I don't like my ILs.

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Hear ya 100%. My MIL is the main problem!