TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

So I FINALLY finished all of my TYs... here is my dilemma... DH had 3 friends who were no-gifters and I said we just have to send TYs that say 'thank you for being a part of our day' etc etc... BUT he refuses to send these people cards.

Two of the guys are brothers and when they went to BIL's wedding in June they both gave him a gift, same situation, they had to travel and pay for a hotel for both weddings... so DH isn't sure why they gave BIL a gift but not us...

The second guy has been married twice. DH went to his first wedding however many years ago and gave a gift. We sent a gift when his first son was born. Then he got remarried in 09 and we flew to Vegas for that wedding and gave him another gift (which we know he got). Then when his second son was born we sent them a gift for that... so they came to our wedding and gave us nothing and DH is pissed.

None of these guys are exactly hurting for money...

So what would you do? They are DH's friends so do I just let it go since that is what he wants to do? I understand why he is mad but do I send something and piss him off just because it is the right thing to do?

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

give him a few days but dude just send the freakin' card.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

i would let him deal with it as he wants to. they are his friends. i wouldnt get involved much more than suggesting to send the card.

is it possible for someone to ask them if they gave a gift? it is kinda bizarre that they havent given one. is DH good friends w them that he would feel comfortable bringin it up, even in a joke?

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

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Posted by little j

i would let him deal with it as he wants to. they are his friends. i wouldnt get involved much more than suggesting to send the card.

is it possible for someone to ask them if they gave a gift? it is kinda bizarre that they havent given one. is DH good friends w them that he would feel comfortable bringin it up, even in a joke?

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I told him if it bothers him this much he should bring it up, so we'll see what he does.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

We had a few non-gifters (all with background but I'll spare the stories bc none of them are really applicable in ths thread).

So anyways, here is a scenario to consider - we actually sent TY cards for helping us to celebrate. We received a gift from one couple like a month after sending out our TYs. I chose to write another quick TY note to acknowledge that we received the gift and I felt good with how I played it out.

As everyone knows, guests technically have a year to send a gift. I'm not suggesting this will change things in your scenario but I'm just sayin!

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

I would just send cards thank you for spending our special day with us. . . . . . . . .

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

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Posted by flibbertigibbet

give him a few days but dude just send the freakin' card.

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Ditto

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

You know how I feel....no thank you card.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

i'd convince him to send it. it might start some sort of war of (bad) etiquitte for future showers, births of kids, etc. Just be the bigger person and show them how it is to be couth.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

2 wrongs don't make a right. I'd want DH to be the bigger person and send a general TY card. 'Thank you for celebrating our day with us.'

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

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Posted by AdriandSteve

2 wrongs don't make a right. I'd want DH to be the bigger person and send a general TY card. 'Thank you for celebrating our day with us.'

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Ditto...

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

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Posted by dctead

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Posted by AdriandSteve

2 wrongs don't make a right. I'd want DH to be the bigger person and send a general TY card. 'Thank you for celebrating our day with us.'

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Ditto...

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Yep, I agree. I'd try to encourage him to send it.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

I'd just send it. Be the better person.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

I wouldn't send a card...that's just me though. I'm not sending a thank you card to anyone who didn't us a gift.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

If they at least gave you a card, despite the fact it's empty, I'd send the ty, with ONE sentence. I had 2 people give NOTHING, not even a card. I may or may not send a card, I haven't decided.

Re: TY Card Dilemma... wwyd

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Posted by mariedsgn

I would just send cards thank you for spending our special day with us. . . . . . . . .

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Agreed.