2nd marriage-sooo frustrated!!

I was married before for 7 years..been divorced for 3. Met the love of my life and we're getting married on March 2,2007. I have 2 beautiful boys which is definitely the only good thing to come out of that marriage. FH has one son. I have never been happier except for one problem...

My parents are not showing any support for the wedding..we have not asked them for a dime (paying everything ourselves). My mom has been very negative so far. I really think she is embarrassed that I'm getting married agiain and actually having a WEDDING! She can't believe I'm wearing a wedding gown (what does she think I should wear? A suit??) We're not having a wedding party but I'm having my sister as my MOH. My dress is ivory/champagne and I want her to wear a champagne dress. my mother was appalled! She said ' I don't see the big deal if she wears whatever color she wants'.

I'm only 34 and i'm so in love (defintely different from the 1st time around) and we want to share it with the world!! My mom and I had a big fight recently because I told her I felt she was being negative.. At this point I don't even want her there!!

Sorry so long but frustarated!! I'm not the first person to have a real wedding the 2nd time around!:

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Posted by N.Y.bride

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I wore a big white ballgown at my second wedding. You should be able to wear whatever you want along with your sister. You should be able to marry whoever you want, whenever you want - you are an adult! Not 18! I would sit down with your mom and really try to have a heart to heart. Maybe shes worried about you?

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i also wore a huge ballgown for my second wedding..my ex husband and i were married for 4 years..i was only 20 and he was 28..both very immature, i was with my fianve for almost 5 years before we got married this sept, and i stil got sh*t from my father lol...he loves my husband but he basically didnt see the 'point' in going all out and making it a big deal...i actually felt like this was more of a big deal for me and my son because we found someone we love and who loves us, we made it a celebration of our new family really..
people will talk..
tell them to get over it!! good luck, you deserve the best!

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Posted by Princess92406

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Posted by N.Y.bride

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I wore a big white ballgown at my second wedding. You should be able to wear whatever you want along with your sister. You should be able to marry whoever you want, whenever you want - you are an adult! Not 18! I would sit down with your mom and really try to have a heart to heart. Maybe shes worried about you?

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i also wore a huge ballgown for my second wedding..my ex husband and i were married for 4 years..i was only 20 and he was 28..both very immature, i was with my fianve for almost 5 years before we got married this sept, and i stil got sh*t from my father lol...he loves my husband but he basically didnt see the 'point' in going all out and making it a big deal...i actually felt like this was more of a big deal for me and my son because we found someone we love and who loves us, we made it a celebration of our new family really..
people will talk..
tell them to get over it!! good luck, you deserve the best!

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ditto... although my second wedding was smaller than many on this board... it was much bigger than the first one.

for us it was a celebration of a new family. even our invites mentioned our wecoming a 'family' and not a 'wedding celebration'. even with that, my grandmother laughed and said that i was acting like a 'MISS'... which in spanish can be very close to 'virgin'. they just don't get it!!!

what i want to say with this is....
you're a big girl! you're a mother of two, which means that you know what's important in life... your children. you would not bring someone into their lives who was not a GOOD PERSON.

i, too, would suggest you have a heart-to-heart with mom. all this 'crap' might be coming from her 'mother's love' for you. she might not want you to incure debt and then have your heart broken, like the first time.

i hope she comes around. best of luck to you... one 'former' single-mom to another

I feel for you......this was my 2nd wedding too & we decided to go all out (mainly b/c DH is an only child and he wanted the big wedding w/ family, etc.) I wore a big, white gown and even had the blusher covering my face walking down the aisle.

You are definitely entitled....try not to take your family's actions to heart....its all about you & your future DH......

Please don't get frustrated. Sometimes our families can be our worst enemies. Just take a deep breath. Have the wedding that you want. It shouldn't make a difference if it is big or small. That is entirely up to you and what makes you and your fh happy.

Thanks for all the responses!! My mom and I actually had a heart-to-heart and I just let it all out. She said I misunderstood her 'tones' and that she was very happy. Since the conversation she has done a 360! Whether it's fake or not, she is certainly putting in the effort. She now calls all the time and seems to be 'into it'.

I feel so lucky to have to have found this man who not only loves me but also my boys and treats them like his own!

congrats on ur upcoming wedding!