today's question is a sort of follow up from yesterdays (or just related)..
Q: How many of you are paying for your wedding completely on your own? which set of parents are helping, if any? did you ask for any help or was it simply just offered?
my answer will be kind of long: this subject has come up a bunch of times in our relationship.. before we got engaged, I was fully prepared to pay for our wedding completely on our own. much to my (pleasant) surprise, my parents stepped in and theyre paying for our venue! huge help, but obviously we still have all of these huge other wedding expenses. a little bit after my parents offer, FH and i were talking about whether or not his parents were going to offer us any help, which i kept telling him we DONT need (although we both agree it would be nice). well our engagement party came and went and we received nothing but $100 from them (which i was excited about!) but FH cant give up on the idea that he wants his parents to help out too. so a couple months ago i read in a bridal magazine that its common and acceptable for the groom to ask his parents for help. i read this to him, and he was like ok im gonna ask then! but i keep telling him we dont NEED it. he has two older brothers who are married and i have no idea if his parents helped them at all, and neither does he, knowing this information would help.. but his parents are also in a different and better financial place now.. so who knows?! so thats my story! lol. we are technically paying for just over half the wedding as of now, which is still a 'low budget' wedding for a long island wedding. where do all of you stand?
Soon2BeMrsPy
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
FH and I were originally paying for the wedding bulk ourselves, his father had contributed some. My mom & stepdad aren't in the financial position to help and my dad & stepmom we don't speak to. We recently (last weekend) went over to FFIL and he said he was paying for the whole thing!!!!!! FH and I nearly fainted but it was such a weight lifted off our shoulders. FFIL is seriously the most generous man.
Simonenarissa
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Re: <3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
Posted by Soon2BeMrsPy
FH and I were originally paying for the wedding bulk ourselves, his father had contributed some. My mom & stepdad aren't in the financial position to help and my dad & stepmom we don't speak to. We recently (last weekend) went over to FFIL and he said he was paying for the whole thing!!!!!! FH and I nearly fainted but it was such a weight lifted off our shoulders. FFIL is seriously the most generous man.
thats amazing!!!
kadymry
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
We are paying for everything ourselves. My dad is trying to help a little but I'm not sure that he will be able to - it would be great though to have some help.
cets1290
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
My parents offered to pay 50% of the venue and vendors for us, and when he and I were planning out how we would save for the other 50%, his parents surprised us and offered to pay the other 50% because they would rather if we saved our money for a down payment on a home, rather than on a wedding. This has really been a huge help for us, and I am so grateful that we are getting all of this help.
Alyssa M
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
We are paying for the wedding entirely on our own, neither of our parents are in the position to contribute. FILs have offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner though, and that is a huge help.
RoandJoe
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
We are paying for most of the wedding ourselves. My parents are giving us a lot--they are giving us 10,000 combined towards any part of the wedding we chose to use it for. They have really been helping so much in the process of all of this. His parents are doing what they can as well. I don't think we would be able to do it all without them!
luckyerialc
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
My parents are paying for the entire venue (YAY)a and my dress. We are taking care of all the other details... DJ, limos, photographer, etc. FH's parents aren't in the best financial situation so they aren't able to contribute. But they are throwing us our engagement party and the rehearsal dinner (both at their BEAUTIFUL house).
meejack1110
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
I am also a 'low budget' bride (aka Broke) lol
We are paying for everything ourselves, with the exception that my mother surprised me with offering to buy my gown. I really appreciate the help, since I mean we are counting friggin pennies over here lol. But also its meaningful that the gown will be from my mom.
FH's Parents are in a different situation they are both retired and living on set incomes so I did not expect any help from them from the start. FMIL has dropped a hint a few times that she will contribute but has yet to give anything and I will not ask, since I do not think she is really able to and I don't want to cause any problems. I also feel like she thinks she HAS to contribute, since my mom did. It's almost like a competition thing since she never mentioned it until after my mom mentioned it. Well anyway, We have done a great job saving, we have been paying cash for everything too, to not end up stuck in debt, and although the help is good, we are managing on our own, something I am very very proud of.
Stephanie621
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Member since
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jdellorso
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
My parents gave us a budget and anything over that budget we have to pay for. I'm really grateful they're able to help us out, it's def a relief.
GoingToBoyle
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Re: <3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
Posted by jdellorso
My parents gave us a budget and anything over that budget we have to pay for. I'm really grateful they're able to help us out, it's def a relief.
My father is doing the same and I'm also so thankful for that!
futuremap
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
My parents and FH's parents are helping out with part of the cost. They each have a number that they have offered us to use wherever we see fit. My parents have also offered to pay for the breakfast the morning after the wedding and FH's parents offered to pay for our after party and the RD. A huge help and we are thankful they can help at all!
LadyReeRee
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Re: <3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
Posted by jdellorso
My parents gave us a budget and anything over that budget we have to pay for. I'm really grateful they're able to help us out, it's def a relief.
Same here! It's working out really well too.
ETA minus the fact that mom said no to the live painter
Soon2BeMrsMango
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
Q: How many of you are paying for your wedding completely on your own? which set of parents are helping, if any? did you ask for any help or was it simply just offered?
FH and I are paying for it on our own for the most part. FFIL has offered to give us some money which definitely helps. My parents are paying for all of my Day of attire and the DJ. My parents and FFIL split our engagement party. My mom is also throwing my shower so they are helping a lot more then I thought they would be able to. My parents said if they can help with more payments later on they will. As for FMIL and FSFIL we haven't received a dime, not even a mention about it. FH & I are not surprised by that at all.
ETA: We did not ask for any help it was offered to us.
Angie2014
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
We will be paying for our wedding ourselves. My parents can't really contribute due to their financial situation, but they offered to help out in any way they can, which we greatly appreciate. It is really stressful working with a very tight budget, especially since I'm still a student, hopefully we can figure out a way to make this work.
ladygoodman
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
My mom is paying for all of my day of attire plus throwing my shower. Also she is paying for my dj and my photographer. Plus im sure she will help more if possible. I know she already told my three brothers she would pay for their tux rentals. Fmil and ffil have not told us what they are contributing but fmil did say they would help us out. So right now im saving like we are paying for a majority by ourselves.
MissToMrs
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Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
FH and I are paying for some and my parents are paying for some. My parents offered to pay and help us as much as they can and they will be paying for about 40-50% of the wedding :) FH's parents will not be contributing at all to the wedding
ASemderWedding
Posted:
Member since
<3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
FH and I are paying for it all on our own. His parent's have offered to help out however they can, but they can't financially afford to give to much. My parents haven't offered and we're not planning on asking either. If they offer to give us some money, it will give us some breathing room - but I think we're going to be O.K. on our own!
Delgie
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Member since
Re: <3 QOTD 5/1/13! <3
FH and I are paying for everything on our own. My mom offered to help with a few expenses which is great because every little bit counts. We didn't ask for any help, but that's just the way my mom is. Man, you girls are so lucky to have so much help!
