A tender moment

I am in the very beginning stages of planning my wedding. Most of what i have accomplished thus far is preliminary net research at best (i. e. looking at dresses, floral, photography and reception hall websites.)

This comes at a bittersweet time as both of my parents aren't well. Mom is in cardiac rehab and dad is in a respiratory care unit in the same hospital. Mom's outlook is good. Dad's is not. It has been very trying on my family to cope and try to celebrate the joy of an upcoming marriage much less think about planning a wedding. I would like to wait until mom is out of rehab before I make any financial or contractual commitments to any vendors. I have al ist a mile long of the things I want to do. Ready...set...go!

Last night, I had been out with FH and my FMIL and she asked me how things were with my parents. I told her what was going on and that I am trying to keep mom's spirits up by giving her a diversion (wedding talk). she quickly said to me 'We are very excited to have you join the family'.

I was very pleased as I thought she didn't care too much for me. Jewish mothers with one son generally have a hard time letting go - especially to a strong minded female such as myself. I sold her short. She knew I was stressed and offered a gesture of acceptance. I just wanted to share that with you all. Now things may be a little easier for us.

That is so nice to hear. You could definitely use the support from your FMIL....and I know what you mean about Jewish mothers with one son. My DH is the only son and his mom has had a hard time with the separation, as much as she likes me.

That is so wonderful to hear...it shows a person's true character when times are rough...either they impress you or hurt you...

I am so glad she is impressing you and being a wonderful person...you are lucky!

I have a great relationship with FMIL and feel lucky as well!

I am thinking of you and sending good thoughts to your parents!

How wonderful! Sometimes it might take people a hwile to say how much they care, but it is such a wonderful feeling when they finally do.

I hope the best for your parents recovery!

Hoping for your parents' recovery.
It is always nice to hear when we are welcomed especially if it's meant from the heart. It's great you get along with your future In-Laws. And you are doing the right thing by keeping her mind occupied.
It is always nice to know someone cares about us. Thanks for sharing the story. It's always good to hear happy stories like these.

You seem to be very strong for a person going through so much, I have no idea what I would do....I wish you all the best for your wedding and the future of your marriage. It seems you have a whole other family welcoming you with opens arms, and that is great too.

I love hearing good stories about in laws!! That's wonderful - now that she has opened the door the two of you can develop a relationship that may just build into something very special.

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Posted by curliegirl

You seem to be very strong for a person going through so much, I have no idea what I would do....I wish you all the best for your wedding and the future of your marriage. It seems you have a whole other family welcoming you with opens arms, and that is great too.

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Thank you. If I am strong, it is for mom. As for myself, I sort of lean on my siblings and FH. As for my new family to be - this next year will prove to be very interesting to see how things unravel though I think we are off to a very good start.

I am very sorry to read about your parents. I'm so glad you have the additional support from your future in-laws. My prayers are with you!

OHG, you are joining into a wonderful family and I am just so sorry that your own is going through all of this. Here's to praying for their very quick recovery.

Thats so wonderful! I am sorry to hear about your parents We are all here for you

Thanks again for your continued support. I just came from visiting them both. They are on the same floor in the Center for Extended Care at North Shore Hospital in Manhasset. I am truly blessed to have such an incredible facility at my fingertips for my parents.

I started easing into 'wedding talk' with Mom and told her of what my FMIL said and Mom though it was sweet. I think she is anxious to get started with all of the planning. I have two older sisters who will be doing a lot of the leg work with me so mom can get her rest and participate in all of her therapies.

Through this experience I have learned that family is more important than anything. I could not go through this alone. Now I see why you guys have GTGs. You have become a support system for each other. During stressful times (good AND bad stress) it is important to have someone in your corner.

First, I am sorry to hear about your parents. It is so stressful seeing even one parent streggle with their health I can't imagine both at the same time. I lost my mom at a young age (I was 8 and she 38) and I moved back in to take care of my father after a massive stroke when I was 27 (he 57). I can imagine the enormous stress you are under. It must be a bit bittersweet to plan such a happy event when your parents are dealing with their own struggles. Like you, I am blessed with a wonderful FMIL. Yes, she is a Jewish mom of an only son. He was married once before so she doesn't have the attachment issues. I think she also knows (mostly because I dedicated 5 years of my life to taking care of my father) that I will always task great care of him.

With all of the negative talk surrounding FMIL's it was so wonderful to hear your story. My FMIL is always there to help me and maybe she can help you and your mom as well.