Advice Needed

Hi,

I'm getting married to a man who has children. This is not his first marriage, but it is my first marriage. I'm not having a bridal party, just my best friend as a maid of honor. He is having his son as a best man. I want to involve his daughter in the ceremony, but not sure what role to give her. She is 16.

Any thoughts (really trying to steer away from the whole bridal party situation).

Thanks,

Carol

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

I personally would have her as a jr. bridesmaid. It still wouldnt mean a full on bridal party. And you dont need an even number on each side. I feel like it might not be fair to have his son playing such a significant role and her not be as included.

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

are you doing a unity candle? maybe it would be cute to involve the kids in lighting the candle with you and your fiance during the ceremony... Other ideas could be doing a reading (idk if she is shy or if she would be up for it), and maybe if you don't want her as a bridesmaid, allowing her to get a dress the same color as your maid of honor and letting her walk down the aisle still so that she feels imporant

Re: Advice Needed

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Posted by Percz2418

I personally would have her as a jr. bridesmaid. It still wouldnt mean a full on bridal party. And you dont need an even number on each side. I feel like it might not be fair to have his son playing such a significant role and her not be as included.

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I agree....I would think she would feel left out with her brother playing such a large role

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

Maybe she can do a reading -religious or poetry.

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

I really like the Junior Bridesmaid idea.

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

When my FH dad got remarried, the bridal party consisted only of their kids, and the bride's sister as MOH. It didn't seem weird and worked out well. The daughters loved the wedding morning routine- manicures, hair, and flowers. I think they really bonded at that time.

Re: Advice Needed

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Posted by Percz2418

I personally would have her as a jr. bridesmaid. It still wouldn't mean a full on bridal party. And you don't need an even number on each side. I feel like it might not be fair to have his son playing such a significant role and her not be as included.

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THIS. I was a junior bridesmaid at age 10 for my Mom's wedding and she had her SIL as a MOH. Mom had been married before and he hadn't. He had his friend as BM and that was the extent of the Bridal Party.
You future daughter will remember this honor for the rest of her life.

BTW, he will be giving me away at my wedding. He is my Dad. My father wasn't involved in my life and lost that privilege and he understands that. Steve is invited to my wedding, but Dad (Mike) will be giving me away.

Side note: Dad also kissed me after he kissed the bride, welcoming me as his daughter. That was over 30 years ago and I will always respect and appreciate him for it and never forget it.

Good luck with your decision.

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

I would at least incorporate her into the ceremony. You could do the sand pouring (not sure if there is a better way to describe it) or the unity candle as was mentioned in a previous post

Advice Needed - Long Island Weddings

Is there a reason you're trying to avoid the bridal party idea?