I need some advice. My wedding is a sat. night. My mom wants to plan a brunch for sunday morning/early afternoon. We are not leaving for our honeymoon until the following friday. We have some relatives staying at a local hotel. My mom heard that we are planning to stay at a different hotel for our wedding night (I don't think that is too much to ask) and she said oh how can you do that, then maybe we should have all the relatives come and stay where you are going so that we can have a brunch I was planning on that sunday morning. My FH feels like she is planning our first day as husband and wife and doesn't want to go to a brunch on sunday with all of my relatives since we will be seeing them all the night before. My mom thinks it is the right thing to do for the out of town guests and thinks my FH is being anti-family and unreasonable. I am very torn and need advice. I am stuck in the middle. I see my mom's point but I also appreciate that my FH wants to have a special day with me. My mom says she 'has never felt so left out of planning' since my FH has been very involved in the wedding planning and we have been making a lot of decisions on our own. My FH and I are also hosting the wedding. Thanks for the advice.
jennbaby
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
I'd say stay at a different hotel and meet up with your relatives at the brunch, even if its for an hour. Tell them you have something planned and make your disappearance soon after. They are your relatives and are traveling from out of town. Maybe give & take alittle? After all you'll be husband & wife forever, you will have your wedding night alone & then don't forget you'll be alone on the honeymoon and then together forever!
LisaT
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
We stayed at the same hotel (but didn't really see guests there). Where you stay seems irrelevant - you should be wherever you want.
My mom threw a brunch the next day and it was wonderful. It really was great to have a little extra time with our guests and to hear their versions of how wonderful the wedding was. We had a lot of out of town guests (ourselves included, we live in CA) and friends we hadn't seen in awhile. We definitely apprecited having more time with them. It was only a few hours and was a great ending to the wedding weekend.
We invited all our out of town guests and close family on both sides. It may be a little hard only to have your family and not his...
JudyBee
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
My FH and I are having an afternoon wedding and then an After Party that night for everyone that we could not invite to the wedding (I have a lot of family). We thought about a brunch but decided that was 'overdoing it'.
If your FH is so against the brunch maybe if your out-of-town guests and relatives are there the afternoon/evening the day before the wedding, you could arrange to spend some time with them then. Otherwise I agree with Jennbaby (it couldn't hurt) and your honeymoon is almost a week later.
My FH and I are staying at a different hotel from everyone else and didn't tell anyone where.
We had an afternoon wedding...then everyone went to DH's aunt's house at night...then we had brunch the next morning at the hotel that everyone stayed at (I wouldn't have chosen to stay there, but since everyone was...I didn't want to have to wake up early and check out and head over to the other hotel.)
I really enjoyed all of the events...It was so nice to see family the wedding day and the day after...BIL is from Arizona and we barely get to see DH's nieces and nephew...
Is your mom butting in a lot in the wedding planning? If not, give her this one thing...
michele31
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
I think your Mom needs to understand that this is your's and your FH's wedding and your FH has every right to help plan it. Many FHs don't help plan the wedding so maybe your Mom thought that she would be your main support with this. I think you need to remind her that 2 people are getting married that day. I would stay at the other hotel and met up for breakfast with my family. Then leave and do your own stuff that day. Explain that you and your FH just want some privacy and your own time to reflect on your wedding day. Tell your Mom that you love her and respect her opinions but that you are growing up and want to do some stuff on your own.
Sara
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
Our wedding was a Sat. night also, and I actaully really wanted a Sunday brunch so we could thank our out of town guests more personally for making the trip. It was really difficult to make it around to everyone at the reception.
We stayed at a different hotel than our guests did and we drove to the guest' hotel the next morning and made a little fashionably late entrance to the brunch and stayed the whole time. We then left for the honeymoon and everyone saw us off. In your situation since your honeymoon is not until the following friday, maybe you can make plans to do something nice with your husband (!!!) for the afternoon or even spend a second night at the other hotel?
aug9bride
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
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jpsgirl
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Re: Advice regarding after-wedding brunch
I personally think it s a nice idea to have brunch with the relatives and friends who traveled to be at the wedding - I don't think it would be a big deal to meet up with them even though you are at a different hotel. It is a nice thing to do, traveling is expensive and you may not see these people all together again for a long time!
