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Am I being a bridezilla?

KPetekie Posted:

Am I being a bridezilla?

Is it too much to ask my bridal party to pay between 75 and 90 to get their hair done? The girl I want to use charges 75 for an updo and 90 for half up half down. I might pay 20 towards their hair too.
I feel like people think I am asking a lot whenever I ask them to pay for things. I'm really not. The dress is 150 plus alterations that won't cost more than 65. If they don't want to do alterations at the place, the dress is only 110. They can choose their own shoes as long as they are brown. And my mom is paying A LOT of the shower so they are only going to have to chip in about 90 each. I think they are saving a lot of money on the dress and the shower compared to a lot of weddings. Considering that, I asked them to get their make up done which is 70 and their hair done which I guess would be between 75 and 90. Some girls didn't want to do their make up and I didn't make a big deal about that but with the hair, I really don't want to hear it. I have been looking for a hair dresser for a really long time and since I'm not getting ready at home, I need someone who is willing to travel and do a large bridal party. When I told one of my bridesmaids about the price, she tried to say that she only paid about 40 to get her hair done for her sisters wedding... but I really don't think thats possible. And she said, 'It was no where near 100 bucks'. I tried to tell her that they charge more for weddings but she said that would be illegal but I really think they do! I've been looking for a long time so I've seen a lot of prices.

What do you think? Am I being too demanding or is that an okay price?
mdawg Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

i think youre a very considerate bride, and if you look around it could be a hell of a lot worse! you're not asking too much at all!

KPetekie Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Thank you! It's so frustrating. I am the second one of my friends getting married and most of the other girls haven't been in bridal parties. They don't realize how difficult it is to put a whole wedding together and most of them don't offer to help or even ask many questions. I know they don't realize but it is upsetting. By the time they get married, people would have done this already and we know what support/help brides need. Its hard being one of the first. And even worse when you feel like everyone thinks you are asking so much of them.
KPetekie Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Also, I love your twilight quotes! Love those books! (Hated the movie though).

gip32680 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by KPetekie

Is it too much to ask my bridal party to pay between 75 and 90 to get their hair done? The girl I want to use charges 75 for an updo and 90 for half up half down. I might pay 20 towards their hair too.
I feel like people think I am asking a lot whenever I ask them to pay for things. I'm really not. The dress is 150 plus alterations that won't cost more than 65. If they don't want to do alterations at the place, the dress is only 110. They can choose their own shoes as long as they are brown. And my mom is paying A LOT of the shower so they are only going to have to chip in about 90 each. I think they are saving a lot of money on the dress and the shower compared to a lot of weddings. Considering that, I asked them to get their make up done which is 70 and their hair done which I guess would be between 75 and 90. Some girls didn't want to do their make up and I didn't make a big deal about that but with the hair, I really don't want to hear it. I have been looking for a hair dresser for a really long time and since I'm not getting ready at home, I need someone who is willing to travel and do a large bridal party. When I told one of my bridesmaids about the price, she tried to say that she only paid about 40 to get her hair done for her sisters wedding... but I really don't think thats possible. And she said, 'It was no where near 100 bucks'. I tried to tell her that they charge more for weddings but she said that would be illegal but I really think they do! I've been looking for a long time so I've seen a lot of prices.

What do you think? Am I being too demanding or is that an okay price?


I don't think that's a bad price at all. It definitely is more because it's for a wedding. Everyone charges more once you say the word 'wedding' but if it's a problem with the BM why not let them get their hair done on their own. Do they have a regular hair dresser that they usually go to. Just tell them how you want their hair. I am letting my girls go to their own salon because that's where they would be comfortable and they would get a good price because they are regular customers. I don't think it's a big deal JMO. When I was in my friends wedding last year we all went to different places and yes your friend is a little right about the price. I went to a local salon and had my hair done and paid $85.00 but that was including adding in hair. If I would have went to the person who did hers i would have paid almost double if not more for the same style because this person 'specialized in weddings'. But once again, NO $75 or $90 is NOT alot to pay.
FuTuRe MrS MaZz Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?
missjones2007 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?



I agree....i let my girls go to their own hairstylists...long as its not nappy im cool
Jennmolloy Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?



I agree with Gina. I plan on letting my sisters know the price for using the same people that I am using but it is there choice. Both of my sisters kids are in the BP so they have to pay for the kids attire as well. It is a lot to expect them to spend more $$$. Money is tight for everyone rightnow.
xosweetiexo Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by Jennmolloy

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?



I agree with Gina. I plan on letting my sisters know the price for using the same people that I am using but it is there choice. Both of my sisters kids are in the BP so they have to pay for the kids attire as well. It is a lot to expect them to spend more $$$. Money is tight for everyone rightnow.


I totally agree with Gina too.... For my friends wedding- her hair stylist was charging like 75 and my regular hair stylist only charges me 35-40 and so I went with my own. You kinda are asking a lot of your BM's by getting mad and pissy at them about this. If they can get it cheaper some place else, then let them. They are paying for a lot, the dress, shoes, make-up, hair, bridal shower, etc..... If my girls do their own make-up that is fine with me. Times are tough now- and if they can save 75 by doing their own make-up then thats fine too. I know its your wedding and you want everything to be perfect, but you also have to understand that not everyone has all the money to be throwing around and have other things to pay for..... you really need to be more considerate about this.


Edit: To answer your question- Yes you are being a bridezilla right now LOL! But dont worry, we all have bridezilla moments.... well I do anyway
ddnsp618 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

sorry again, but i agree with some of the PP...i am not making my BMs do any of that unless they want, and it doesnt really matter that much about makeup...but im not even going crazy on things for myself.

if you are set on having this particular woman do their hair and makeup, maybe you should think about paying for it yourself...JMO that would make your request fulfilled without having your BMs freak..

sorry they are giving you a hard time though!
Dani777 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

I am not 'making' them get their hair done at all... I left the option totally open to them. But, since it is $70 a girl.. I decided to pay half... so it's up to them if they want to take up on the offer. And, the kids are super cheap, which I am paying fully for. Funny thing is, my BMs are actually telling me NOT to pay ANYTHING towards their hair b/c I'm spending enough... but I don't like being forced to pay 70 or more on hair for ONE day....sometimes I just can't afford it. Guess I got lucky with a nice BP... LOL. Still, I would talk to them.... even offer to pay at least half... JMHO

MaggieLuvsJoe Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

I'm with Gina on this one too....Why do they have to use a certain hairstylist and pay $75-90, maybe they can do their own hair or maybe they know someone who can do it cheaper?

I told my girls to do whatever they want with their hair, as long as they like it, who am I to tell them how to do their hair or where to do it?
jennaandguy09 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?


I ABSOLUTELY agree with you on this one, I told my girls, they can use my girl or one of the girls in the shop i go to, or they can go wherever they want, I feel bad MAKING them use this person or that because it's very expensive to be part of a wedding, i've been on the other side before and I want the girls to by comfortable, happy and budget conscious.
coldasice217 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

No, I do not think you are being a bridezilla. However, I would give them the option.

It's absolutely fine to say that you would like hair and makeup to be done, as in you don't want them rolling out of bed. Believe me, I've got one of those, so if that's your concern, I completely understand. I would say that you are having someone come do the hair/makeup, and this would be the price. If they would rather use their own stylist, that's fine as well, as long as they're at the house on time for pictures, are put together, etc.

If you really want them to get done by this particular person for a reason, unfortunately, you will probably have to pony up a portion. You just have to decide if it's worth it or not.
Novia09 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?


I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Some people honestly CANNOT afford to spend the extra money for their hair/makeup... and since I WANT everyone to look the same, I'll be paying for everyone to get this done.
Karsav7096 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

ITA with everyone. I am letting my girls do whatever they want with their hair. It is hard times and I feel asking them to get their hair done is too much of a finacial burden. I know my gilrs will be beautiful no matter what!!

elysemichelle Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

I understand where you are coming from and DO NOT think you are being a bridezilla!!! my BM's are almost all from out of town and dont have hair dressers or make up artists here. I am contemplating whether to pay or have them pay cuz my MOH is askin g them to spend $900 on my bachelorette destination party. I know you are concerned about your BM's feelings. I would def offer to pay at least 20, but have a sit down with al your BM's, tell them what you think and get their opinion. I def dont think you are being a Bridezilla though!!!!

MrsBtobe2009 Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Every wedding that I am in I have always gotten my hair done and never complained once about it. My girls are all having their hair done but makeup some of my girls are really good at doing makeup so not everyone is getting theres done. I do not think you are asking too much for your girls to get their hair done. JMO but it is your wedding and your pictures and they should do what you want. I know I am a b**** but that is just my opinion. I do not feel that you are asking a lot AT ALL.

stephlovesseyi Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

Posted by missjones2007

Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

im sorry but i have to disagree with you. im the type that thinks that the girls should really only have to worry about the cost of their dress. im not making them get their hair/makeup done professionally... then can if they want and can use whoever i use, but if they dont agree with the price, thats fine, they can get it done elsewhere if they choose. some people cannot afford to spend money like that for someone else wedding... they might not even want to spend that much for their own wedding!

i guess i think this way bc i dont have the extra money to just blow like that IMO... and i know theres always the argument that well, they shoulda never said they'd be in it if they couldnt afford it... but if the idea is to have the people that you love and care about most in your wedding party, having them have pro hair/makeup shouldnt even be a concern

i think its realllll easy to get wrapped up in the whole wedding process and forget about what should really mean the most... not how the pics will look if they spend $10 or $100 ya know?



I agree....i let my girls go to their own hairstylists...long as its not nappy im cool[/QUOTE

I agree that they should get their hair done by their own hairstylist. You as the bride should not have to worry about them getting it done from the same person. Im also a bride who thinks that my Bridesmaids should only have to worry about their dress. Times are hard, I dont want anyone resenting me because I forced them to spend money that they may not have. 90.00 is a lot of money.

Just my opinion. Let us know how it goes!
Deeglasser Posted:

Re: Am I being a bridezilla?

honestly this includes one of the reasons i am NOT having a bridal party. i have been in a few BP's and this type of stuff creates animosity toward the bride and it isn't fun anymore...

i understand that when you ask someone to be in the BP they say yes with the understanding that it will cost $$. i think it's important to consider that people may not have extra money- a dress and shoes are essential for the day but things like hair and make up are extra expenses that are not necessary (IMO $70 for makeup is a lot when they can do it themselves- same with the hair)

if these people are your true friends, you love them for who they are!!! please don't think i am being rude, i just want you to see what it may be like from a different perspective!

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