Today, I was in the process of wording out programs. I wrote 2 sentences about how I loved FH from the moment I saw him. I asked FH to write 2 sentences about how he feels about me, and he told me no. He said he doesn't write well, and that he wasn't comfortable with it.
Am I wrong to feel bad about that? I know how he guards his feelings (I am the same way), but you'd think the man can express some verbal affection on our wedding day. I am not going to push it, but I am surely going to tell him that his resistence to do it makes me feel bad.
I knew he would be embarassed, but I just didn't expect him to say no, period.
Johnny&Maur
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
I could understand you maybe feeling a little bad...like 'why can't he express how he feels about me on this huge day?' BUT i can see his point. When i mentioned exchanging vows with my fiance, he got a little squeamish about it...he will constantly tell me how he feels about me, and can say it in front of others, I guess though in a church...in front of everyone..and feeling a little nervous to begin with makes some people uncomfortable. I wouldn't make a big deal about it...you already know how he feels about you, he wouldn't be marrying you if he weren't crazy about you!!
:)
hbradio
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
Doesnt he know he is going to have to say his vows to you in front of several people?
I dont know what else to say - I am sorry!
CubanBride
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
Posted by hbradio
Doesnt he know he is going to have to say his vows to you in front of several people?
I dont know what else to say - I am sorry!
Oh, well it's not vows I was asking for or anything like that. Just a sentence or 2 to put on the programs. I thought it would be nice.
I would be like 'well don't write it, speak to me from your heart and I will write it down' but I am just mushy like that. Maybe it could work for you...
DMcK
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
I understand, if my FH said that to me, I would be hurt. Can you ask him again, and tell him that his previous response was hurtful to you? Maybe he didn't realize that his remarks were insensitive and hurtful.
ppwbride
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
My feelings would be hurt too, but remember it's how he feels about you and expresses it you personally that really matters. Some people are squeamish about public displays of affection whether they be written or spoken. It doesn't mean he loves you any less, just that he doesn't want to share his personal feelings about you with everyone.
angelbear217
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
I'm sorry to hear that. If I were in your shoes I would feel hurt. Maybe you can help him put his feelings into words. If he stillsays no, don't push it. Here's a hug.
takeoutcook
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
I dont think this is anything more than his being uncomfortable to express very personal feelings in a rather public way. . . to be perfectly honest, I dont know that I would feel very comfortable putting my feelings about FH into words that would be printed in our program - I'm a fairly private person and while I love FH dearly, the thought of 200 people at the church reading my heartfelt declaration of love would make me nervous and self conscious.
I can understand your being upset - I just thought I'd give you my take on it to perhaps suggest what he might be feeling.
CubanBride
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Re: Am I expecting too much?
Thanks ladies. I know it's not hte biggest deal in the world. I was just hoping for a little more is all. I am going to let him know how I feel, but I drop it after that.
