am I over reacting?
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am I over reacting?
Member since
Re: am I over reacting?
I don't think yuou're over-reacting at ALL. That's a HUGE expense.
Does FH know how the other GM feel about it? It's a little tough bc he's the best man, but I don't think that means you have to submit to everything.
There may be some things you can do to r\educe the cost
1) Stay at a different hotel for the wedding
2) SHare a room with another couple.
3) Go to Foxwoods but for one day. Don't stay overnight. Just go for the golf, which is a fixed cost, or just go for the gambling, with a set budget
The other thing I would say (And this is also something I personally would do) is that if he's close enough to be BM, then he's close enough to speak his mind, and I think he should tell the cousin it's really a lot of money and make some suggestions for lower cost alternatives.
I personally think that booking a hotel that requires 3 nights is over the top, buying a suuit, is over the top, and the 2 day bachelor party is more reasonable, but not in conjunction with the other two.
I think he should speak up, and make other suggestions. However, choosing a different hotel and staying one night is something you can do without changing anyone's plans
Does FH know how the other GM feel about it? It's a little tough bc he's the best man, but I don't think that means you have to submit to everything.
There may be some things you can do to r\educe the cost
1) Stay at a different hotel for the wedding
2) SHare a room with another couple.
3) Go to Foxwoods but for one day. Don't stay overnight. Just go for the golf, which is a fixed cost, or just go for the gambling, with a set budget
The other thing I would say (And this is also something I personally would do) is that if he's close enough to be BM, then he's close enough to speak his mind, and I think he should tell the cousin it's really a lot of money and make some suggestions for lower cost alternatives.
I personally think that booking a hotel that requires 3 nights is over the top, buying a suuit, is over the top, and the 2 day bachelor party is more reasonable, but not in conjunction with the other two.
I think he should speak up, and make other suggestions. However, choosing a different hotel and staying one night is something you can do without changing anyone's plans
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Re: am I over reacting?
$190? A little much, but if it were only for one night I guess it would be okkkkk. BUT How can they (the hotel) require wedding guests to stay three nights?!? That seems reallllly strange. I've never heard of this!!
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Re: am I over reacting?
that's a bit excessive and i would be upset too. That's a lot of money even if you didn't have a wedding to pay for now. ![]()
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Re: am I over reacting?
that is alot of money
dont they realize we still arent out of the recession.
that is a big expense for 'fun'
dont they realize we still arent out of the recession.
that is a big expense for 'fun'
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Re: am I over reacting?
Posted by smilesjc81
that is alot of money
dont they realize we still arent out of the recession.
that is a big expense for 'fun'
I feel like it's more than double what you'd expect to spend on a wedding.
As a GM I woudl expect
Up to $100 on attire
Up to $200 for hotel room
Up to $200 for Bahelor party
This basically doubles all of that and more. I think it's nuts.
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Re: am I over reacting?
I dont think you are overreacting! I would be the same way. One thing I was careful about as a bride planning was the cost for people...
I think you have a right to get frustrated. The thing is that he is your FH's cousin...and Idk if there is much wiggle room.
Maybe you could book a hotel nearby....and NOT have the 3 night min...
sorry!!!![]()
I think you have a right to get frustrated. The thing is that he is your FH's cousin...and Idk if there is much wiggle room.
Maybe you could book a hotel nearby....and NOT have the 3 night min...
sorry!!!
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Re: am I over reacting?
i agree with the other girls. that's a lot of money. i know that a lot of hotels out east require a 3 night stay because it's in-season, but you may be able to find other hotels a little further west that don't require the long stay. there are 2 in riverhead that i don't think have a minimum stay. lots of places out there are bed and breakfasts and little motels so they have a lot more 'rules' but the hilton garden inn and holiday inn in riverhead are chains so i don't think they have the same rules.
i'm surprised the guys were 'required' to buy the suits! idk why i just assumed that the guys always rented...weird. what if they don't want them after the wedding is done?![]()
i'm surprised the guys were 'required' to buy the suits! idk why i just assumed that the guys always rented...weird. what if they don't want them after the wedding is done?
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Re: am I over reacting?
you are not over reacting at all! I hate when people think just because it is their wedding you can shell out all sorts of cash but yet they would never do the same in reverse. That said it is a really tough situation. Do you have to stay at the hotel where they blocked rooms? In regards to the suit I have never heard of a groomsmen having to buy one! crazy. Wish I could be more help...crappy situation sorry ![]()
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Re: am I over reacting?
this is RIDICULOUS! as i was reading this i was thinking that hese people must be out of their minds.
most brides are so cost concious on how much their guests will have to pay and it looks like this couple didn't care at all.
if i was you guys, i would find another hotel and stay there. no where does it state that you have to stay at the hotel that they reserved.
When you say North Fork - as in CT?
and is Foxwoods being considered the Bachelor Party? Because if it is, then are the GM paying for the Groom's share as well? which would mean it would be an even bigger expense.
I just wouldn't go to Foxwoods. Period. this is an insane amount of money to spend on anyone, and you have to pay for your own wedding to boot!
most brides are so cost concious on how much their guests will have to pay and it looks like this couple didn't care at all.
if i was you guys, i would find another hotel and stay there. no where does it state that you have to stay at the hotel that they reserved.
When you say North Fork - as in CT?
and is Foxwoods being considered the Bachelor Party? Because if it is, then are the GM paying for the Groom's share as well? which would mean it would be an even bigger expense.
I just wouldn't go to Foxwoods. Period. this is an insane amount of money to spend on anyone, and you have to pay for your own wedding to boot!
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Re: am I over reacting?
booo! That is completely inconsiderate. I think couples who require their bridal party to spend so much money should NOT be expecting a monetary gift on top of it.
I can see that your FH wants to be there for his cousin since they are close but seriously, there needs to be some compromise.
I agree with the girls who suggested sharing a hotel room or staying at a diff one.
I can see that your FH wants to be there for his cousin since they are close but seriously, there needs to be some compromise.
I agree with the girls who suggested sharing a hotel room or staying at a diff one.
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Re: am I over reacting?
that's freaking insane! And daham..really ballsy.
I'm so honest. I'd say, listen, we cant afford this. sorry.
I'm so honest. I'd say, listen, we cant afford this. sorry.
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Re: am I over reacting?
Your not overreacting. That is a lot of money to spend for one wedding when you are trying to say for your own.
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Re: am I over reacting?
That's a ton of money! I've never heard of a hotel saying guests have to stay 3 nights, but I kinda get your FH's side too because he is the BM. Maybe you call the hotel and tell them you have an important family function the day after the wedding so you can only stay one night? If they say no I would tell the couple that you really want to participate in all of their wedding activities but the only way you can afford it is to stay at another hotel. Good luck!!!
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Re: am I over reacting?
You are not over reacting!!! Holy crack monsters...not only is that a bit excessive and but thats a lotta demanding. ![]()
I hope you and FH work things out.....and he realizes that you're right about this.
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Re: am I over reacting?
I don't think so. I think it's very inconsiderate for someone to expect you to pay so much money to participate in their wedding.
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Re: am I over reacting?
I totally agree, thats over $1000 on someone else's wedding when your saving for your own, thats insane!
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Re: am I over reacting?
deleted - lurkers ![]()
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Re: am I over reacting?
Posted by mybabylovesmoi
booo! That is completely inconsiderate. I think couples who require their bridal party to spend so much money should NOT be expecting a monetary gift on top of it.
I can see that your FH wants to be there for his cousin since they are close but seriously, there needs to be some compromise.
I agree with the girls who suggested sharing a hotel room or staying at a diff one.
ITA! That is a lot of money! I would never make my wedding party shell out that much $ for my wedding.
