Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
gfield101
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Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
We originally were going to get married at the reception hall.. so guests wouldnt have the big gap in between.
Then we decided lets to a church to make our mothers/families happy. But now everyone thinks there is too much of a gap in between the ceremony and the cocktail hour???
Even though Fh and I are going to provide a coach bus for all guests who want to go back to the hotel in between and have some drinks, and then back to the hall and back to the hotel....
Church is at 3 Cocktail hour starts at 7
So now im thinking of changing cocktail hour to 630 or moving church to south shore where most guests will be from... GRRr..I hate this!
jteach711
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Don't stress over this, how many times have you had to deal with a gap for someone elses wedding? Now it is time for people to return the favor. I know how much I hated vridal showers and baby showers, but I knew that one day I would want people at mine. So you suck it up and do what you have to do. It is one day. I would not change anything. JMO
ant n tilde
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
I wouldn't change it. Most brides worry about this but you know what? When I attend a wedding, I just suck it up and deal with the gap between the church and CH. And your guests will too.
My church is from 2:30 to 3 and my CH starts at 7:30. I am giving myself enough time to get to the hall and finish all the pictures before the CH.
Good Luck!
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
honestly who cares if the guests have a gap, if people dont like it they wont go to the church.
The only time its a true convience for guests is when the ceremony and reception are at the same location
dont worry about a big gap, YOU NEED THAT TIME FOR PICTURES!!!!!!!
gfield101
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Thanks girls! It is so reassuring to hear these opinions. I feel like no matter what we do, someone is going to complain! Its over a year away and im already getting stressed..
femmes
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
dont stress over it..Time will fly that day no one will notice...Bottom line its your day, and you do whats right for you!
PrincessJen
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Posted by gfield101
Thanks girls! It is so reassuring to hear these opinions. I feel like no matter what we do, someone is going to complain! Its over a year away and im already getting stressed..
You are correct about that! FH & I told the familes we wanted to do the ceremony at the RH for convenience. One had the audacity to say they didn't think it was a real wedding unless it happened in a church. I told them it was our day & we're doing things our way because we're footing the bill & it's what we want. Can't please everyone all the time so do what makes you happy!!!
Snowflake08
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
to be honest with you, i am planning a lot of my wedding from a guests perspective and things that i have liked and didnt like as a guest
they are coming to share the day with me and i want to make people happy
JACK808
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Posted by Snowflake08
to be honest with you, i am planning a lot of my wedding from a guests perspective and things that i have liked and didnt like as a guest
they are coming to share the day with me and i want to make people happy
I agree with you. I am still in the very beginning stages of my planning, but just in trying to decide where I might have my wedding I am taking into consideration that I have a lot of older guests coming so I want to make sure my location is easy to get to and not too far, which does limit my options but I care much more about them getting to and from my wedding safely. Also, I would love a night wedding, but I'm thinking a day wedding would again be more apprpriate for my older relatives. I know it is 'my' day, but it means more to me to have the people I care about there, and if it means compromising some things, I am more than willing to do so.
gfield101
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
sooo..where do I draw the line then? Should I make it earlier and miss part of my cocktail hour? I guess some people will appreciate it more in the long run... eek so confusing
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Posted by gfield101
sooo..where do I draw the line then? Should I make it earlier and miss part of my cocktail hour? I guess some people will appreciate it more in the long run... eek so confusing
No...dont change anything cause people are going to complain either way, a gap is a gap
doesnt really matter, YOU have to take PICS!
madseason
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
I wouldn't change it. You need that time to take pictures - don't miss your CH! If your guests really want to be at the church and the reception, they'll make it happen and won't mind the gap.
tdebe
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
After the day is over the only people that it's really gonna matter to is you and FH. If you make the wait shorter for your guests but then you miss CH or feel rushed, you're never gonna get that back. People can complain but it's only one day for them, while it's been months maybe years of planning and the beginning of a lifetime memory for you. Do what makes you happy.
jgl
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Posted by gfield101
We originally were going to get married at the reception hall.. so guests wouldnt have the big gap in between.
Then we decided lets to a church to make our mothers/families happy. But now everyone thinks there is too much of a gap in between the ceremony and the cocktail hour???
Even though Fh and I are going to provide a coach bus for all guests who want to go back to the hotel in between and have some drinks, and then back to the hall and back to the hotel....
Church is at 3 Cocktail hour starts at 7
So now im thinking of changing cocktail hour to 630 or moving church to south shore where most guests will be from... GRRr..I hate this!
Changing your Cocktail to 630 is not going to make that big of a difference... i say keep it as is!!!
Our church is at 1pm or 2pm (may make it 2 so i have more time in the AM) and our cocktail hour is at 7
that is the way it is going to be!!
people can go to the hotel or to our parents inbetween. We are going to use that time to take pictures, and relax.
Stop stressing about everyone.. this is your day. you can't please everyone!!!
alymikewedding08
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
You can't even let it stress you out.. there are so many other things to worry about.. people will be there.. and not everyone will go to your ceremony... work friends.. not very close friends.. even some distant family might only come to the reception.. but the people who really WANT to be there.. will make sure they are there for both.. and they will entertain themselves in between.. no worries!!
dream426
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Don't worry about it. I have a huge gap also. My ceremony at the church starts at 3:00 and CH starts at 7:30. We have a shuttle that will take the guests fromt he church back to the hotel. They can get ready for the RH have some drinks and then take the shuttle to the RH. The RH said the guest can come an hour early there will be things in the lobby for them to hangout and eat. Don't worry about the guests and don't listen to what they are all saying. It will stress you out more.
Snowflake08
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
remember, if you ask for opinions, you are going to get them so people can say 'dont listen to what they are saying' but you asked a question
there are people that dont want to 'go to a coffee shop' during a 4 hour break - sorry, as a guest its the truth
but, whatever, obviously to some it matters and to some it doesnt
Shell84
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
I would have love to have my wedding in a church, but it would be such an inconvenience for our guests since they are traveling the world to be with us. Most of our guests are from out of state or out of the country. If you don't have that problem, it's fine to have a big gap between church and ceremony. I usually get my hair done after the church just to spend the time.
gfield101
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Re: Anyone ever feel like their wedding is all for the guests?
Posted by Snowflake08
remember, if you ask for opinions, you are going to get them so people can say 'dont listen to what they are saying' but you asked a question
there are people that dont want to 'go to a coffee shop' during a 4 hour break - sorry, as a guest its the truth
but, whatever, obviously to some it matters and to some it doesnt
You're totally right! Its great to get everyones perspectives! I felt from the begining that we were doing everything for the guests, which is great to know that im not the only one..but then we switched it to a church to also accomodate our parents and make them happy, we felt ok for the guests now, we'll be spending over a grand for the day to have a coach bus transport everyone (who wants) to go back to the hotel to relax and drink,.then to the RH then back to the hotel, so I guess I was just curious, where do I draw the line, I wont be offended if people dont come to the church, lord knows I havent gone to all of them, but im still conflicted, now Im thinking of moving the church closer to my parents house for family members who want to stop there after...This whole accomodating thing gets stressful
