Anyone insist to bring their children to your wedding?

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Posted by ElegantBride

My cousin told me if the kids can't come, she would not come. Can you imagine the nerve of her...I would never ever insist on extra guests...ask but never give an ultimatum!!

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My cousin did the same thing. It turned out that she had a bridal shower on the morning of my wedding that she was 'allowed' to bring her child to (she didnt' tell me this at that time). But she asked me if she could bring him (the youngest, she has three) because it was too much for her to be away from him, blah blah blah.

I said no and she sent in her decline. I haven't spoken to her since.

I would never ever ever put someone else in that situation. For her wedding, I wasn't invited with a guest, even though it was four years ago, I was an adult (along with my brother) and I was dating my now husband.

To me, the wedding was better off without her negative energy. Unfortunately, you may just have to say no, and deal with the fact that she doesn't come. In a few years, she'll realize her mistake, I am sure.

I really understand the not wanting kids at the wedding. But to say that a wedding is no place for kids, is ridiculous in my mind. DH has 4 nephews and I have 3 little cousins I'm close with. His 4 nephews range from 1 1/2 - 7 years old and my cousins are 6 1/2 and 5. The 6 older kids were in the wedding party, BUT even if they weren't I couldn't imagine NOT having them there and telling my SIL's they could not bring their kids. The kids had a blast dancing the night away, and DH and I had a blast dancing with them.

ETS: All 7 boys were SO well behaved during the ceremony which I'm sure was a complete bore to them. They stood/sat under the chuppah with us and were just little angels didn't complain once about having to sit there for so long

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Posted by VadersBride2006

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i just don't understand-- kids don't belong at a wedding reception.

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As a mother, I take offense to this statement... My wedding would be awful without my kids! Some people don't think of kids as a burden.

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and i'm saying: if you are a mother and you have YOUR children and you are the bride-- then they do belong at a reception along with the FG and RB. maybe i wasn't clear-- kids that are IN the wedding or involved in the wedding (IE the bride or grooms children) is totally understandable.
but for all of the guests to bring their young children-- JMHO, i don't think it's appropriate. I do feel, however, that your child is a completely different situation.

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Posted by melissa&carmine

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Posted by VadersBride2006

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As a mother, I take offense to this statement... My wedding would be awful without my kids! Some people don't think of kids as a burden.

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Please understand that by not inviting kids we aren't saying that they are a burden - it comes down to the cost of having children at the reception. For me, if I invite one child I have to invite all 35 of them - way out of my buget.

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yes, i forgot to include that-- which is a HUGE part of it, OMG i would be bankrupt if everyone brought their young children.

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by seta

I have to be honest with you. I too do not feel that a wedding, especially an evening formal affair is a place for children. For one, it is most likely passed their bed time, and they are going to be cranky...and depending on their age , behavior, and parents, because all children/situations are different, they run around and think they are in a playground...

Please don't take this as desrespectful...we have a ton of children in our family...i only invited 4 from my side that are 12 and older...against my wishes, fh is giving his first cousins the option to bring theirs if they want, but no one else is invited with their children.....I am very unhappy, but have compromised, because it means a lot to him.

Speaking as an aunt, teacher and person with a ton of children in their family,...i just don't get why people would want to bring their kids....especially their little ones, I mean, don't they want to enjoy themselves?

In answering the posters question, it is your wedding and your right to tell them that it is an adult reception. Stick to your guns!! Good luck!

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i agree completely with this statement. my brother told me that I MUST invite his children to the wedding and that he doesn't care about anyone else's kids. they will be 4 and 1 1/2 on the day of our wedding. if we invite his, we must invite the SEVENTEEN other children to our wedding--and i'll be damned if this wedding turns into a romper room.

please don't take offense VadersBride--but a long affair involving many adults, drinking, dancing, and mingling is NOT what many people would consider a place to bring children. for some reason when it comes to weddings i think people's common sense just goes right out the window when it comes to kids. you wouldn't think to bring small children to any other adult-orienated affair such as a New Year's Eve party or perhaps a friends 30th birthday, or private dinner party at a friend's house, etc. why is it okay to bring them to a wedding?

my issue is people who get attitudes when you inform them politely that you would like for there NOT to be kids at the wedding. (this is not directed at anyone on the board--just in general) if i ask you nicely and WE are the ones hosting---who are YOU to tell me who you will bring to my affair?

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I AGREE 100% with the above two posters-- you guys said what i was trying to say MUCH better than i could have written it LOL thank you!!!

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Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

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Posted by MJDoc12

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Posted by seta

I have to be honest with you. I too do not feel that a wedding, especially an evening formal affair is a place for children. For one, it is most likely passed their bed time, and they are going to be cranky...and depending on their age , behavior, and parents, because all children/situations are different, they run around and think they are in a playground...

Please don't take this as desrespectful...we have a ton of children in our family...i only invited 4 from my side that are 12 and older...against my wishes, fh is giving his first cousins the option to bring theirs if they want, but no one else is invited with their children.....I am very unhappy, but have compromised, because it means a lot to him.

Speaking as an aunt, teacher and person with a ton of children in their family,...i just don't get why people would want to bring their kids....especially their little ones, I mean, don't they want to enjoy themselves?

In answering the posters question, it is your wedding and your right to tell them that it is an adult reception. Stick to your guns!! Good luck!

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i agree completely with this statement. my brother told me that I MUST invite his children to the wedding and that he doesn't care about anyone else's kids. they will be 4 and 1 1/2 on the day of our wedding. if we invite his, we must invite the SEVENTEEN other children to our wedding--and i'll be damned if this wedding turns into a romper room.

please don't take offense VadersBride--but a long affair involving many adults, drinking, dancing, and mingling is NOT what many people would consider a place to bring children. for some reason when it comes to weddings i think people's common sense just goes right out the window when it comes to kids. you wouldn't think to bring small children to any other adult-orienated affair such as a New Year's Eve party or perhaps a friends 30th birthday, or private dinner party at a friend's house, etc. why is it okay to bring them to a wedding?

my issue is people who get attitudes when you inform them politely that you would like for there NOT to be kids at the wedding. (this is not directed at anyone on the board--just in general) if i ask you nicely and WE are the ones hosting---who are YOU to tell me who you will bring to my affair?

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I AGREE 100% with the above two posters-- you guys said what i was trying to say MUCH better than i could have written it LOL thank you!!!

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thanks!

I love children BUT...

I have gone to so many weddings where kids run around, get hurt and cry, roll on the floor, break something, run between tables and run into people (why not.. the parents are enjoying themselves and could not care less where their kids are, right?),etc.....

Most of the parents' kids let them run around with no supervision whatsoever and it's up to all the other guests to worry about the kids.

They yell at their kids once per hour like that's going to do something.