FH and I are very greatful to our friends and families who are sharing in our day and we want to do something to thank them- but it's just not in the budget to do a RD. the way it boils down is that it's a miniature version of the wedding! we're not sure there is going to be extra money floating around to do this 'Un-necessary extra party' as FH likes to call it. Would it be rude to just have them over to the house for cake and coffee??? or maybe have a few trays of food from a local restaurant brought in?? I don't want to come off as cheap or tacky, but I'm not sure this is something else we can afford. Is anyone else not doing a RD or have suggestions as to what else could be done?? Thanks.
twoifbysea
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I would be COMPLETELY okay with having a RD that was more low key, like a BBQ or with trays of catered food at someone's house. I think that RD's have gotten way out of hand and, like you said, can be 'mini weddings'. I wish FIL's would save the $$$$$$$$$$ and help us pay for the wedding itself!!!!
You shouldn't feel obligated to have some huge catered event as your RD. It should be fun, relaxed, and full of joy and laughter. Do only what you want!
Sorry, I'm having a rough day and it revolves around the whole rehearsal dinner extravaganza.
little34
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I dont think that is rude to have everyone over your house...get some apps and drinks and it will be fine...I am sure everyone will be happier doing that then having to go out...I know I would!!!
MoochsWifey
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
A low key RD is 100% fine and I think they can even be more fun.
FH were considering doing something at my mom's house until she freaked about having to have people over the night before the wedding. (our apartment is just wayyy too small to have everyone there).
Thankfully FH dad offered to cover the RD cost for us, but if he hadn't I would have just talked mom into letting us do something at the house!
9509Bride
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I read that an RD does NOT have to be a big lavish formal affair. You can have pizza at your home, a back yard BBQ or coffee and cake as you suggested. I think people get too hung on these type of things. I know what you mean about the RD turning into a min-wedding!!!!!!!1
GL
ilonka020
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I am not doing an RD. I am Polish and it's not a tradition to have a RD.
nessa09
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
If we are in our house by then, we were going to have a backyard party with trays of our favorite foods, so I think its a great idea. Everyone can relax and hang out
geegee827
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I think it's a great idea. I would prefer to do the RD that way, but my mother is not up for hosting something the night before the wedding (I don't want her to either since I'm sleeping there the night before and getting ready there); and FILs don't live here so they don't have a house to do it in.
MrsGRod09
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
We are going to do something low key in my house just have catered food and a cake.
dazies1011
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
Im doing it at my house... making some food and some coming in. We dont have the money to have everyone out. Plus if they want heir guest to come we definatlety couldnt do it out.
ace730
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I think a low key event is fine. FSIL said she had everyone over for tea/coffee and desserts after the rehersal and it was fine.
megsher
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
I was in a fabulous wedding and the bride and groom had a bbq for the rehearsal. They have a huge yard, and they just grilled out. It was really fun! They weren't getting married at the church so the minister actually came to their house and we practiced there.
bride2binli
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
no thats fine you do what you could afford, I am sure everyone will understand please!
Celeste617
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
Since we are getting married at the RH, we're not going to have a RD. We figured we'd do a luncheon a few weeks after to say thanks to our BP and give them gifts then. Nothing fancy.
PROBM
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
i actually woudl prefer going over someones house with trays of food from my fav local place.. but since fh is all about 'what everyone else did' we r having ours at Donovans in bayside which is very reasonable priced
PoppedInASnap
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
We are doing a back yard bbq. The rehearsal is a friday night and our neighborhood means NO PARKING no matter what. It's family and close friends I know that they will understand :)
EmiNoa628
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
As of now.. I'm not sure where I'm having my rehearsal dinner. But I don't think its at a fancy restaurant or catering hall.
Most likely we will have something in my moms house or my FMIL. I'm not sure.. I'll think about it when it gets close.. I'm not a making a big deal out of this..
pooh57362
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
We're not having a RD. We really can't afford it. We were thinking of having everyone over for drinks one night or a bbq.
Lsorrent
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
Our RD is going to be a catered BBQ at FIL's house. They've already offered to host it.
To be honest, I don't think people are really going to want to get all dressed and dolled up the night (or two nights) before the wedding.
We went to FH's cousin's wedding in October, and they had a fancy RD the night before. Which meant I was in heels and dresses both nights. My feet were exhausted by the end of the weekend!
Aliaxtra
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Re: Anyone not doing a RD?? is this tacky?
Posted by GRod2Be
We are going to do something low key in my house just have catered food and a cake.
ME TOO! And i got the 'tacky' comments already It never seems to fail how quick some ppl are to judge or but yet- They dont open their pockets for things!!!