I'm one of those brides-to-be with a host of non responsive bridesmaids. I came very close to kicking one particular BM out of the wedding last week because she refused to answer my e-mails & phone calls.
I have 7 BMs and they are from different parts of the country. Anyway . . .the wedding is 4 months away and I'm curious to if they have all purchased their dresses yet. Last January, I asked them to have their dresses either purchased or ordered by 5/31.
I know this sounds like a really stupid question, but . . .should I take the chance at being percieved as a pain in the butt and ask them if they have ordered their dresses?? Or should I leave them alone. I'm trying not to 'baby' them . . . . but I don't really know how else to feel at ease with the various concerns at hand.
Helene718
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Re: Are Your Bridemaids Retarded Like Mine?
Can you call the bridal shop to see if they ordered them? That's what I did.
radiostar
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LOL!!! That sounds like a great idea! That's some ole' Inspector Gadget type stuff! I love it!
radiostar
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I decided to use David's Bridal for convienance sake. I don't know if calling is possible. More suggestions, please!
Sunny
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I think you should ask them.. You have a right to know!!
Helene718
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Give them until 5/31, then start asking them. You have the right to know. Maybe come up with another excuse to call, like giving them the date for the rehearsal dinner or letting them know about hair appointments. I really wouldn't feel bad about asking them though.
radiostar
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Great advice, ladies! Thanks so much. I knew that I would feel better after asking my LIW family!
prncssrachel
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Totally ask them! It's your wedding, not an informal get together. A lot of stress is going to come your way if they are not on top of things. This is something that all BMs SHOULD KNOW! But some of them are clueless and need us wonderful brides to clue them in
julybride444
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Give them a call and remind them. I have the same problem. Although I love my girls, I'm the first to get married and they have no clue how much work it is...plus they are all in school (grad school/law school/undergrad [my little sister]) and in diff. parts of the country.
Make sure to remind them. I call mine every week just about!
radiostar
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prncssrachel . . . . You are SO right.
radiostar
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julybride444. . . . I try to be understanding of what each respective BM has on their plate...but all I want is to be INFORMED!! That's all!!! That's not too much to ask for, is it?
I would send out a little email...outlining the 'timeline' for the wedding events...
put down...'did everyone order their dresses? if not let me know so we can make arrangements'
don't put them on the defensive...I even fogot about things for my own sister's wedding...it just wasn't a priority for me...as selfish as that sounds
Jenn524
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You could also ask your maid of honor to find out.
ThongLori
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hey there, i'm just playing devils advocate here, but i felt kind of bad for these BMs when i read your subject line! I've been a bridesmiad more times than I can remember -- and it is a lot of responsibility, especially financially that is being put on them. If you want to know the status, why not start an email circle so everyone can easily and privately check in with you.
FYI -- I myself am a bride now, and since I've been a maid and dealt with this so many times, I've opted not to have a bridal party at all!! (but that's just me) :-) Good luck!
curly2003
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radio- mine are retarded and USELESS!!! EXCEPT my MOH/Sister. Uggh, very frustrating. I say call 'em on it babe!!!!!!!
prncssrachel
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I like yabbobay's idea. a wedding timeline/email!
LImom
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I, too, would wait for after 5/31, and then I would try to come up with a question either by e-mail or in a phone conversation that will give me the info. For example, 'Which saleslady helped you when you went to David's Bridal?' or 'When you went to David' Bridal, what date did they give you as to when the dress will be in?' If you don't make it a yes/no question, you'll find out right away if someone hasn't gone. Just another sneaky idea, if that's your style.
OctBride05
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i would call them on 5/31, and ask them. if i were in this situation i would want to know and make sure that everyone has their dress or if they don't have it yet to remind them. you don't want to have to worry about this at the last minute.
pschica
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i have the same problem!!
Dee7772
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I would just ask them. Tell them you don't mean to be a pian, but that you are going through your list of things and want to make sure that everone purchased them already, if not, please do so asap.
