A few of my cousins (we're all very close) keep asking me if they're in the BP and they're NOT.. I have a huge family.. there's no way I could put all the girls in it... As it is, my BP is already going to have 9 couples, not including the kids.... I feel so awkward saying no so I just keep saying that I haven't decided yet.... I've already asked most people bc the wedding is 10 months away, but how do i tell the girls that aren't in it, that I haven't chosen them ?? Especially bc some of them who are asking have sisters that ARE in the wedding... any tips?
xoxo Maria
angel1219eyez
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Re: awkward
this is a realllllly tough question...i would tell everyone that you didnt have room for all the cousins that why you didnt put them in...and the ones that have their sisters in it...i would try and tell them that you picked their sister bc you knew that they would understand and not get offended and wouldnt realy care if they were or were not in the BP...maybe that will work....thats a reallllly reallly hard situation
grkbarbie
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Re: awkward
lol i dont understand why any1 would WANT to be in a BP. i mean, u have no say in the dress. i guess some ppl arent vain like i am. but i woudl neeeeeeeeeever everrrrrrrr wanna be in a BP. i like wearing something I LIKE and PICKED OUT. lol
feelings will be hurt but apologize.. always be diplomatic.. and then say..well at least u get to wear what u want lol.. and u can stil include them in the bach party and if u do lunches and stuff.. u might want to include them.
soontobecruz
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Re: awkward
hmmm thats a toughy.. it's obvious you don't want to hur anyone's feelings... the 'sisters' who are in the BP do they know yet? Maybe consider an all or nothing, just to not deal with the added stress. I mean you don't want to hear from your cousins/ Aunt's?g'mas every year at the holidays how you had one and not the other....
That's probably what I would do all or nothing. Sorry if thats a cop-out answer
JenBill61210
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Re: awkward
You could let them know that you are trying to keep the BP at a certain size and hope they understand.. maybe you can include them in a ceremony reading to make them feel included?
christine2010
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Re: awkward
Posted by soontobecruz
hmmm thats a toughy.. it's obvious you don't want to hur anyone's feelings... the 'sisters' who are in the BP do they know yet? Maybe consider an all or nothing, just to not deal with the added stress. I mean you don't want to hear from your cousins/ Aunt's?g'mas every year at the holidays how you had one and not the other....
That's probably what I would do all or nothing. Sorry if thats a cop-out answer
i completely agree with this. when i asked my parents opinions about including only some cousins they said either all or none. otherwise its something that the family will hold over you forever. just to keep the peace.
beebs341
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Re: awkward
Something like this happend to me. My older cousin kept asking me if her daughter was going to be a flower girl. I dont' want a FG nor do I want kids at the wedding (besides my nephews who are the RB's) She then proceeded to tell me that her daughter doesn't care, but she does. Like, sorry No!
megan_gallagher
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Re: awkward
is there any 'special' thing for them to do? like my fathers cousins wedding I wasn't in the PB (and I should have been).. but I presented the gifts to the alter.
I think its the whole 'name in the program' thing that people want.. and being in pictures.
Maria5117
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Re: awkward
thanks girls... all good suggestions... i'll have to give it some more thought... i'm leaning towards finding something else for them to do... i've already asked the other girls so I couldnt take them out now....
soontobecruz
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Re: awkward
Posted by Maria5117
thanks girls... all good suggestions... i'll have to give it some more thought... i'm leaning towards finding something else for them to do... i've already asked the other girls so I couldnt take them out now....
what about readers, hand out programs?
I have actually found asking people who arn't int he BP to help with things before the big day means a lot to them. I asked my god-mother to come to the church before the rehersal with me to come set up, asked if her kids (my cousins) would come too. I think she was really happy to do it. Friends too have all offered to help with DIY stuff. This way they feel involved, I think they really just want you to know they are there for you.
