bachelorette rant (bm)

bachelorette rant (bm)

so my friend since childhood now lives in MD. The shower is march 29, bachelorette is april 26, and wedding is may 25, so we spoke early on about how she may skip out on the bachelorette or the shower. That was totally fine with me because I understood that it was alot of traveling, and the bachelorette is up in CT at foxwoods so that's like a good 6-7 hours for her. So, she decided to skip on the bachelorette. Well, my sister starts booking stuff for the bachelorette and my friend decided she would come, which was awesome and I was glad she was going to make it. My sister split up the room cost and dinner cost for everyone, and they all started sending her checks.

So here is where the rant begins:
My friend calls me and says that a girl she is friends with is having her baby shower on the same day as the bachelorette and she is going to stay back to go.. I told her price was going to up for everyone and she goes 'oh, yeah. but nobody sent checks yet anyway right?'...I told her my sister has gotten 4 checks already. So my friend told me that she will send the money but will probably just stay back to hangout with her friend at the baby shower. This is the best part though: she tried making me feel bad for her friend and said 'i just feel so bad that I'm going to miss out on her special day, I'm so conflicted:(' ummmm what about the girl who's bridal party you are in????

I'm not mad that she wants to stay back because i know it's a long way to go, but what pisses me off is that she committed to something else and then is feeling bad for her friend the whole time. How about feeling bad for my sister who is putting alot of effort into planning this while you flip flop and can't stick to a decision! I'm also kind of upset that she would sit there and say how bad she feels for this other girl while basically saying she would rather not hangout with me at the bachelorette... I'm hoping it's just because the traveling will suck but still

end rant: please tell me if i'm out of line here..

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

It's def not right that she committed to something & then decided to back out. If she sends the money so it doesn't effect everyone else I wouldn't be as annoyed but it still sucks! Two of my cousins in my bridal party are not coming to my bachelorette party so I can totally relate to you (and they live local) Sometimes those that we dont expect disappoint us the most.

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

You're definitely not out of line. The fact that she's sending money anyway helps; it would be worse if she wasn't doing that....but that's still crummy of her.

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

Yeah, it is understandable to be upset, especially because she had already committed to going. It is nice that she (hopefully) is sending money so the rest of your party isn't screwed over by her indecision. I have a feeling that someone in my bridal party is going to do this and it is stressful! You pick people because they are important to you and you hope that you are important to them and unfortunately these types of events test that assumption. I wish you the best of luck!

Re: bachelorette rant (bm)

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

I don't think you're out of line at all, I just think this is why brides are not supposed to be involved in the planning for showers or bachelorette parties. There is no way that on top of all of the stress girls go through just dealing with the wedding planning (and in your case, putting your new home together) that YOU should be the one dealing with this - that's why you're not planning it.

It was not right of her to bail out after she committed to something else - she should definitely still pay the money otherwise that's not right for anyone to cover for her flakey a$$! I also don't think it was right to take her problem to you. It seems that she knew that she didn't want to face speaking to your sister because what she was doing is messed up.

I would just make sure you make your point clear that what she did was wrong and then let it go. No reason to hold a grudge about something that won't be changed when everything else going on in your life right now is happy!

Re: bachelorette rant (bm)

.

.

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

I don't think you're out of line. Once you say you're in, you should be in. Just make sure you say what you need to say because you don't want any unresolved issues later one. I told my friend that to me, the shower was more important, so she knows that's the only think I really would be upset if she missed. She lives in VA and is getting married this year too, and I understand it's a big trip.

Re: bachelorette rant (bm)

Re: bachelorette rant (bm)

bachelorette rant (bm) - Long Island Weddings

As long as she sends the check - I wouldn't sweat it. It sucks when multiple loved ones in your life are celebrating life's milestones around the same time. I don't think she is choosing a better event over another, just more convenient and weighing out that she'll be there for your wedding and this is a Baby Shower. As long as she is not slacking on her responsibilities I wouldn’t take it to heart.