Black Tie

laural2979 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:23 AM

Black Tie

I'm just curious...who is putting black tie on their invites? FFIL thinks that it's incredibly rude to ask guests to rent a tux for a wedding when they're already spending so much money to attend. Personally, I'm not putting black tie on my invites, but I'm curious what other people's take on this is.

soon2bcopswife Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:25 AM

Re: Black Tie

My fiance is a cop and feels the same way (didn't want his friends to have to spend money on a tux either!). So instead, we put Black tie optional. This was really just to explain to guests that they can't come in khakis (it happened at my friends wedding, what a horror show). Our catering hall is pretty formal and it's a 7:30, Friday night wedding.

MissingTheBGene Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:30 AM

Re: Black Tie

I didn't put anything down, I don't think I'll notice or care much about what people wear as long as they show up.

Mrs.CM Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:32 AM

Re: Black Tie

If you are going to write anything, I would write black tie optional this way people are not obligated to rent tuxes, but they still know it will be fancy. I don't think I will be writing anything, but that may change!

CLMon7906 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:47 AM

Re: Black Tie

Posted by MissingTheBGene

I didn't put anything down, I don't think I'll notice or care much about what people wear as long as they show up.

same here

ShortBride Posted: Apr 25, 2006 11:57 AM

Re: Black Tie

Posted by MissingTheBGene

I didn't put anything down, I don't think I'll notice or care much about what people wear as long as they show up.

Us too. All the men wore suits or sports coats and dress pants except for one friend, who wore a blazer, and a T-SHIRT!!!! It was actually kind of funny, my MIL thought he was a busboy

SIBride06 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 12:08 PM

Re: Black Tie

I put 'Black Tie Welcome'

engaged&excited Posted: Apr 25, 2006 05:53 PM

Re: Black Tie

Posted by laural2979

I'm just curious...who is putting black tie on their invites? FFIL thinks that it's incredibly rude to ask guests to rent a tux for a wedding when they're already spending so much money to attend. Personally, I'm not putting black tie on my invites, but I'm curious what other people's take on this is.

I agree with your FFIL. I think even 'optional' is a strong recommendation and I would assume people know to wear a suit to a wedding so I would find it rude. Even if there are one or two that dont know, it will not ruin the wedding!!

MrsWmson2be Posted: Apr 25, 2006 05:55 PM

Re: Black Tie

I didn't put anything about it on my invite.

Sunrise813 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 05:55 PM

Re: Black Tie

Posted by laural2979

I'm just curious...who is putting black tie on their invites? FFIL thinks that it's incredibly rude to ask guests to rent a tux for a wedding when they're already spending so much money to attend. Personally, I'm not putting black tie on my invites, but I'm curious what other people's take on this is.

Gotta agree with your FMIL.

Goldi1021 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 06:31 PM

Re: Black Tie

We put 'black tie' on our invitations. People who werent sure what to do asked us and we told them a dark suit was fine. Id say about 90% of our guests wore tuxedos. We kicked everyone else out.

Actually, we didn't but come on now, nobody ever does. There are no bouncers at weddings. Most of our males guests were over the age of 30, probably closer to 40 and OWNED tuxedos. DH was the one who wanted black tie. HE wanted the men in tuxedos.

SummerBride06 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 07:08 PM

Re: Black Tie

Posted by MissingTheBGene

I didn't put anything down, I don't think I'll notice or care much about what people wear as long as they show up.

i agree. honestly, these people are my closest family and friends. i'll just be happy they are there. as long as they're not in a speedo or jeans, i won't even notice.

Katie&Chris2006 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 07:10 PM

Re: Black Tie

FH wants to put Black Tie on the wedding invite so his family doesn't show up in jeans and ratty t-shirts. Lord help me!

kr2913 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 10:02 PM

Re: Black Tie

We put black tie requested on our invites. Most of our family wears suits to work so we wanted them to be dressed a little nicer than they would to work. However, if they don't want to spend the money on a tux or can't, then they can wear their suits.

Hamptonsbride06 Posted: Apr 25, 2006 10:10 PM

Re: Black Tie

I dont think its rude at all to request a certain attire at a formal event. Some people really do not know, I would rather put it on my invitation than recieve 120 phone calls about what people should wear ( I have already recieved about 20 asking the formality of the wedding, and if it is appropriate to wear a tuxedo, or if it is a khakis and button down shirt kind of thing) You are paying $50-$300 for these people the eat dinner, they can suck it up and dress the part

Shiv Posted: Apr 26, 2006 11:58 AM

Re: Black Tie

I've heard that you either put black tie or you don't. supposedly black tie optional just confuses people and they are unsure how to dress.

i went back and forth ith this for a bit, but decided my invitation would speak to the formality of the wedding and people would know its fancy.