Black-tie optional wedding .... Back
mbtieds Posted: Nov 01, 2005 05:52 PM+
mbtieds MEMBER SINCE: 3/05 TOTAL POSTS : 671 WEDDING DATE: Aug 05, 2005
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 05:52 PM bride-minus.png

Black-tie optional wedding ....

We're going to a wedding in January in Florida that is black-tie optional. Do I have to wear a long, really dressy dress? I don't want to overdo it and I don't know anyone else that will be there except for the bride so I dont know what to do!

ps....any helpful hints on where to find a great buy on a dress either online or store??

pps..also is it ok if DH doesnt wear tux?
BHW Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:00 PM+
BHW MEMBER SINCE: 7/05 TOTAL POSTS : 1474 WEDDING DATE: Sep 25, 2005
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

mbtieds Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:04 PM+
mbtieds MEMBER SINCE: 3/05 TOTAL POSTS : 671 WEDDING DATE: Aug 05, 2005
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:04 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

Thanks good point...I have time...why am I stressing now??!!!
babybug631 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:08 PM+
babybug631 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 2037 WEDDING DATE: Dec 17, 2005
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:08 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I would try nordstrom or neiman marcus online. They always have great sales on dresses.
thefirstlady Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:13 PM+
thefirstlady MEMBER SINCE: 8/05 TOTAL POSTS : 1819 WEDDING DATE: Aug 05, 2006
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:13 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I'd go w/ a cocktail dress, and FH can just wear a suit. You can't go wrong w/ a cocktail dress! Try JCPenney, I got one there in the dress department, you can also try Juniors. I got mine on sale, for about $65. My friend worked part time at Dress Barn, and found a cute dress for a wedding also, and it was marked down to $20. (and she's someone who will spend $150 on jeans)
Goldi1021 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:27 PM+
Goldi1021 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 12766 WEDDING DATE: Feb 18, 2006
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 06:27 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

Cocktail dresses are more than acceptable. The only type of invitation that warrants a gown or long dress, as etiquette dictates, is WHITE tie and tails. My wedding is black tie and people have been asking me the same thing. This is what I have been telling them.
June_Bride_2004 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 07:26 PM+
June_Bride_2004 MEMBER SINCE: 10/05 TOTAL POSTS : 182 WEDDING DATE: Jun 06, 2004
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I agree...cocktail is fine.
Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:15 PM+
Soon2BeMrsS MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 5286 WEDDING DATE: Nov 11, 2011
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:15 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....


Posted by mbtieds

We're going to a wedding in January in Florida that is black-tie optional. Do I have to wear a long, really dressy dress? I don't want to overdo it and I don't know anyone else that will be there except for the bride so I dont know what to do!

ps....any helpful hints on where to find a great buy on a dress either online or store??

pps..also is it ok if DH doesnt wear tux?



me too, it's fh's cousin's and we don't have any of the details yet except the date & the fact that it's in the keys....
Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:16 PM+
Soon2BeMrsS MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 5286 WEDDING DATE: Nov 11, 2011
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:16 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

Where are they having the wedding ex. the beach or a ballroom at a hotel? the location should tell you all you need to know about what's appropriate/ inappropriate...
Goldi1021 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:37 PM+
Goldi1021 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 12766 WEDDING DATE: Feb 18, 2006
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:37 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....



Where are they having the wedding ex. the beach or a ballroom at a hotel? the location should tell you all you need to know about what's appropriate/ inappropriate...


Id have to disagree on that one. If the invite says black tie optional, it shouldnt matter where the location is. I have seen unbelieveable tent weddings in large back yards where you wouldnt even know you were in a tent and they were black tie. My wedding is black tie and in a temple. If my wedding were black tie and at the Waldorf-Astoria, I would expect the people to wear the same thing. HOWEVER, Florida weddings are not like NY weddings and it may be slightly less formal.
Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:42 PM+
Soon2BeMrsS MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 5286 WEDDING DATE: Nov 11, 2011
Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:42 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....


Posted by Goldi1021



Where are they having the wedding ex. the beach or a ballroom at a hotel? the location should tell you all you need to know about what's appropriate/ inappropriate...


Id have to disagree on that one. If the invite says black tie optional, it shouldnt matter where the location is. I have seen unbelieveable tent weddings in large back yards where you wouldnt even know you were in a tent and they were black tie. My wedding is black tie and in a temple. If my wedding were black tie and at the Waldorf-Astoria, I would expect the people to wear the same thing. HOWEVER, Florida weddings are not like NY weddings and it may be slightly less formal.



Black tie optional isn't even corrrect ediquitte, the affair is black tie or it isn't( as per my BFF's coordnaitor )

All I was saying was if it's at the beach I'd dress differently (bright colors light fabric's etc) than if it was in a ballroom (where i'd probley wear a black a-line gown etc.)
Goldi1021 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:47 PM+
Goldi1021 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 12766 WEDDING DATE: Feb 18, 2006
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....


Posted by Soon2BeMrs.S
All I was saying was if it's at the beach I'd dress differently (bright colors light fabric's etc) than if it was in a ballroom (where i'd probley wear a black a-line gown etc.)



You are right. I never thought of fabrics.
csorisi Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:50 PM+
csorisi MEMBER SINCE: 2/05 TOTAL POSTS : 1764 WEDDING DATE: Nov 04, 2005
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I have been to 2 weddings in florida in the past year. At both weddings I attended people wore polo shirts & dockers--people don't have weddings in Fl like they do up here. Although it may not be etiquete I am having a black tie optional wedding because I have been to too many weddings in NY where you pretty much see a girls *** & I just didn't want. In fact I don't even want the men to wear tuxes just want the ladies to dress 'properly'. I would never put on the invitiation black tie because I don't think it is right to have men have to go out & rent tuxedos but that is my own opinion. Wear what you feel is comfortable. Since I am having a black tie optional wedding I would expect to see girls in cocktail length dresses or a nice outfit I wouldn't expect ball gowns or long black dresses.
Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Nov 01, 2005 08:57 PM+
Soon2BeMrsS MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 5286 WEDDING DATE: Nov 11, 2011
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....


Posted by Goldi1021


Posted by Soon2BeMrs.S
All I was saying was if it's at the beach I'd dress differently (bright colors light fabric's etc) than if it was in a ballroom (where i'd probley wear a black a-line gown etc.)



You are right. I never thought of fabrics.



that's all I ment If I had the property I would deffinitly do a backyard tent affair w/ blacktie
Goldi1021 Posted: Nov 01, 2005 09:10 PM+
Goldi1021 MEMBER SINCE: 1/05 TOTAL POSTS : 12766 WEDDING DATE: Feb 18, 2006
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

There are so many factors to consider.

Most of our guests are older as we are older ourselves. Many of our guests are from the NY Metropolitan area. With those two factors to consider, many of our guests already have tuxedos in their wardrobe because they attend many functions requiring tuxedos. For those who do not own a tuxedo, I would not compel them to rent a tux, but I would prefer them to at least wear a dark suit. I would also not expect an OOT guest to rent a tuxedo after paying for travel accommodations. I simply put black tie on my invitation to make sure nobody showed up in Dockers and sports jackets or hoochie dresses. It happens more often than you'd think.
Soon2BeMrsS Posted: Nov 01, 2005 09:15 PM+
Soon2BeMrsS MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 5286 WEDDING DATE: Nov 11, 2011
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Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I think the hoochie dresses are the most disrespectful
CJStein Posted: Nov 02, 2005 09:44 AM+
CJStein MEMBER SINCE: 11/04 TOTAL POSTS : 2628 WEDDING DATE: Mar 18, 2006
Posted: Nov 02, 2005 09:44 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

I just went to a wedding that was black tie and under a tent on someone' property...all the men were in tuxes and most of the ladies wore dressy cocktail attire. You can't go wrong with a nice cocktail dress that's past the knees.

I have to say, everyone in black tie (the men really) looked so good. It was quite swanky. Kind of wish we were doing black-tie now, but our families/friends do not all own tuxes and I don't want to put anyone out.
JennJay Posted: Nov 02, 2005 10:23 AM+
JennJay MEMBER SINCE: 8/05 TOTAL POSTS : 871 WEDDING DATE: Nov 12, 2006
Posted: Nov 02, 2005 10:23 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Black-tie optional wedding ....

Yes it is ok if FH does not wear a tux... just make sure it is a dark colored suit, like charcoal or black. I don't think you have to wear a really long dress. It is black tie optional,so really whatever you want as long as it is a little more dressy than normal.
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