BM FROM HELL

I need to vent to you ladies bc if I dont I might go ballisitc on my FSIL.

So I asked my FSIL to be a BM in our wedding. She is FH only sibling and I had a semi normal relationship with her up until we got engaged. Then this weekened she has my FMIL tell FH that she will not be in the wedding bc she doesnt like the possible BM dress I have picked out...The BM dress that she has never seen in person or even tried on!!! She doesnt realized that being a BM is about being there for the people getting married.

She is making this wedding all about her and I am ready to tear into her I cant take much more of her selfishness. The best part is FH told her that if she is quitting our wedding she needs to tell me personally and she is still yet to do that!!

I am giving her until the end of the week to contact me and if she doesnt she will be hearing from me!! Trust me I have worn some ridiculous BM dresses and worn everyone of them with a smile bc I was there for the people getting married!

Sorry needed to vent!

uh oh...breathe sister...

don't be like me....people s u c k for no reason

and you get the pic b/c you deserve it!!!

wow!!!!!!!!im sorry but if she dont like the dresses then screw her lol..this is ur wedding and it takes alot of nerve for someone to do that.i would say to fh listen i would love to have her butif she is going to be like this then she is out.we dont need the extra stress..im osry she is being like this and let me know if u need tob bailed out of jail for killing her lol

She just emailed my FH and told her she would get back to us after she is down with her Grad School miderms....UM NO YOU WONT!!

I am kicking her out now...no love lost!

She is going to look ridiculous when everyone is wondering why she isnt a part of the wedding party and I make sure to tell them its bc she hated the dress she never tried on!!!

Yikes! She is sooo selfish!
Is she young??? She cant just not be in it b/c she doesn't like the possible dress!

What does your FMIL have to say about it?

She is 25 but has never worked a day in her life and still has mommy and daddy pay for EVERYTHING...meanwhile FH and I are paying for our wedding 100% with no help at all from either side.

My FMIL is a older version of her, she created this monster. It is so insulting and rude and the fact that they cant see that makes me even angrier.

Do any of you know how hard it is for me to keep my irish temper controlled right now!!!!

Some people are completly ridiclious! I can't believe that she wants to leave the BP b/c of a possible dress!!!! That's sooo crazy!

Sorry that you are going through this! BREATE!!! Everything will work out.....

Don't be petty, don't take it personally, and don't let it ruin this time in your life. Chances are it is not about the dress color at all and she is just looking for an excuse.

She doesn't want to be a BM. tell her you are sorry she feels that way, but it is her choice. Plain and simple. There is no point in making waves. I know you are upset because she is obviously spoiled and trying to make it about her. So, don't make it about her. In the long run it'll be better she isn't a BM - or there will be other things she will try to sabotage.

So, just shrug it off and don't let it ruin anything or turn into a feud. If you make a big deal about it, it will only come back again. Better to get rid of her without a fuss.

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Posted by mimid15

She is 25 but has never worked a day in her life and still has mommy and daddy pay for EVERYTHING...meanwhile FH and I are paying for our wedding 100% with no help at all from either side.

My FMIL is a older version of her, she created this monster. It is so insulting and rude and the fact that they cant see that makes me even angrier.

Do any of you know how hard it is for me to keep my irish temper controlled right now!!!!

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you know what, this is probably a blessing in disguise. If she wants to step down from being a BM then seems like she did you a favor. IF she is going to complain about not liking a dress that she never tried on then that means she would most likely have caused drama over other things. Who knows what else you would've had to deal with if she is in your bp. And this way you didnt even have to kick her out, its her loss and your gain.

The Lady J just embarrassed me with her rationality and common sense. I was getting all riled up (it's so funny how I can get so invested in some of these posts- moron!), and she says 'So, don't make it about her.'

And she's absolutely right.

There are certain people for whom the inability to get under someone else's skin is the most infuriating thing there is. This girl is TRYING to create a dramatic situation. The win is not giving her what she wants. The win is making her think you couldn't care less.

I wouldn't give her the opportunity to call you. I would call her, and be as nice as possible. 'Hey, I hear you're not available to be in the wedding party. I just wanted to confirm, because then I'll have to make some different arrangements. I just wanted to call you as soon as possible. I wanted to let you know that that's no problem whatsoever!' If you deliver it properly, with all 'kindness', she may sound nice on the phone, but she will be soooo bitter when she hangs up, you have no idea.

If she says something about not liking the BM dress, DON'T EVEN tell her she hasn't seen it in person, or ask her to try it on. Why try to get this girl into your party??? Just say, 'Oh, that's too bad. Okay!' And continue talking about other things. Just drop it. You want out?? No problem. Out.

The reason I sound so crazy about this is that a few years ago someone I know had a FSIL in her party. I hear it went about the same way. She never really got her dress altered properly, and cried and threw a tantrum about it in the limo on the way to the wedding. The entire ladies side of the Bridal Party and the Bride were in the Limo. HOW ABOUT the bride was on her knees in the limo stitching this girl into her dress?? Because of her, the bride was over 1/2 hour late to her wedding.

Don't let this happen to you. Trust me, you don't want her there.

PLEASE let us know how it works out. I hate being left hanging!! I want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by mimid15

She is 25 but has never worked a day in her life and still has mommy and daddy pay for EVERYTHING...meanwhile FH and I are paying for our wedding 100% with no help at all from either side.

My FMIL is a older version of her, she created this monster. It is so insulting and rude and the fact that they cant see that makes me even angrier.

Do any of you know how hard it is for me to keep my irish temper controlled right now!!!!

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you know what, this is probably a blessing in disguise. If she wants to step down from being a BM then seems like she did you a favor. IF she is going to complain about not liking a dress that she never tried on then that means she would most likely have caused drama over other things. Who knows what else you would've had to deal with if she is in your bp. And this way you didnt even have to kick her out, its her loss and your gain.

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Def. agree w/ Espo. This is surely to save you alot of stree in the future. There's already so much you have to worry about with the wedding...and having a selfish person to add in the mix will make it worse.