I have one MOH and one BM in the wedding party. I just found out last night that my only BM (my FH's sister) is pretty sure she is pregnant! She hasn't been to the doctor yet, but took two pregnancy tests and they came back postive!
If I am doing the math correctly, that means she will be due right around the time of the wedding - May 21!
She thinks she can still attend even if she gives birth earlier that week, but she will be nursing and the baby will need to come along. I am very happy for her, but I am concerned we won't know until very close to the wedding whether she can attend or not. Oh, and her daughter is our flower girl. If she can't attend, neither can the flower girl! (They live OOT). We won't know what to write in the ceremony programs, or whether we'll need a bo-k for them, etc. until the last minute.
If her due date turns out to be as close as I think it might, do you think it would be appropriate to suggest that she and her daughter not be in the wedding party? It takes the stress off of anyone. That way, if they are able to attend, my BM doesn't have to worry about the BM dress fitting her or BM duties. She can just relax. And we don't have to be guessing who from our wedding party will be able to show and come up with contingency plans.
Blu-ize
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Thought his posted...but I figured 9 months leaves you in April.
Nautical bride
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
A friend told me that pregnancies are really 9 1/2 months, so I figured it out that way. She would have conceived the baby in early-mid August, probaby. That's how I got to the middle of May.
Am I calculating this wrong?
Blu-ize
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
She's probably a few weeks pregnant already, so try counting by weeks...39. That will probably be a little more accurate. I'll do the same figuring she conceived on Aug 10.
jill13bean
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Posted by Blu-ize
Thought his posted...but I figured 9 months leaves you in April.
can't be......my wedding is in April and it is 8 months away Not that i am counting or anything
Blu-ize
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
If she goes full-term it will be two weeks b4 your wedding calcuated at 39 weeks. Maybe you should see how she feels about it. I know it's just one more stress you don't need.
Blu-ize
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Posted by jill13bean
Posted by Blu-ize
Thought his posted...but I figured 9 months leaves you in April.
can't be......my wedding is in April and it is 8 months away Not that i am counting or anything
If you consider that August is already done, but she may already be a few weeks along.
MamanDaddyof2
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
I have 2 children and I just want to say pregnancy is unpredictable first off I gained ALOT of weight with both my children and they were both late (5 days and 2 1/2 weeks) I would wait to see what her actual due date is and then make a decision on her being in the wedding
jill13bean
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
In all fairness she should make the decision not to be in your bridal party to take away the stress. I think it is just as great for her to be there at the wedding but even in your bridal party how will she put on a gown????
My MOH is pregnant but is due in December so it was no big deal! So happy for her
My mom was not in her closest cousins wedding because she was 8 months pregnant with me but that was her choice
hope everything w3orks out for the best
ChristineC68
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
I would wait until she goes to the doctor and gets an approximate due date. If it is really close to the wedding date, have a heart to heart about her participation in the wedding.
You can both decide what would be best - she can stay on as the MOH or maybe have another honor position such as a reader or still make a speech if she is able to attend the wedding. I don't think it's realistic for her to say that if she has the baby on Monday that she will be ready for a wedding that weekend (JMO).
Blu-ize
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Posted by ChristineC68
I would wait until she goes to the doctor and gets an approximate due date. If it is really close to the wedding date, have a heart to heart about her participation in the wedding.
You can both decide what would be best - she can stay on as the MOH or maybe have another honor position such as a reader or still make a speech if she is able to attend the wedding. I don't think it's realistic for her to say that if she has the baby on Monday that she will be ready for a wedding that weekend (JMO).
I agree!
jen110704
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
I was in the same situation. My BM backed out she is due 3 days after my wedding. Although I was upset. I understood. I would have still loved to have had her but I understand it's alot of stress
jvs77
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
I agree, wait to see what due date her doctor gives her and then talk it over with her, and see what she is most comfortable with.
Nautical bride
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Thanks for all of the good advice, ladies!
I agree - finding out her due date is really key. I am reacting before I know what it is. And a heart to heart will probably be needed at some point.
I should have mentioned that she is 40 years old and this will be her 3rd child, which further complicates things. She could have a late delivery or complications. She is in great shape and we are all hoping for an easy pregnancy for her!
I will keep you posted on what happens! Thanks!
jenifer99
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
that happened to me! my friend told me she was due on 8/18 so she couldn't be in my wedding, she had the baby on 8/10! at least she can come to wedding now
Nautical bride
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
jen110704 and jenifer99, did you replace your BM with someone else after she told you? How close to the wedding did they back out?
luckybride2004
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
I went to a wedding a few weeks ago where the bride's FSIL was supposed to be a BM. The (now)SIL ended up dropping out at the very end due to being VERY pregnant at the wedding. Her name was still in the program. I was not familiar with the situation so I asked my FH what happened (he is friends with the groom). When it was explained to me, it was no big deal. The SIL ended up coming to the wedding as a guest but did not want to participate in the wedding because she felt that due to the pregnancy she would not be able to help the bride in the way that a BM does. She also left pretty early. I really think that you should leave it up to you BM. She may be more preggo than you think and will look fabulous for your wedding! Even if not, almost every designer make maternity dresses now. I'm not sure why I think this, but I have always felt that a preggo BM always looks so cute next to a bride. Almost like the bride is the picture of innocence in her white gown and the preggo one, well...
jenifer99
Posted:
Member since
Re: BM is pregnant and guess when she is due?
Posted by Nautical bride
jen110704 and jenifer99, did you replace your BM with someone else after she told you? How close to the wedding did they back out?
i didn't replace her. i ran out of friends
she told me she was pregnant about 8 months before the wedding date