BM Issue!! Please help!!!!

I am sorry if this is kinda long, but here goes:

I invited a friend that I am not really close to anymorel to be my BM mostly b/c she is my son's godmother and I knew her feelings would be hurt if I had left her out. Also, she was there for me during a time when my FI were having issues some years ago. She gladly accepted and was really happy to be in the BP. Now, she recently bough a house in NJ and told me that she wouldn't be available to go dress shopping etc b/c they were having work done on their house for several months. I was ok with that. Now, over the holidays (Xmas and New Year) I called and left her vm and she never got back to me even though she sent me a xmas card. Then my FI finds out from a co-worker who is best friends with my BM mother-in-law that my BM is pregnant! Now, she has severe back issues so I know having a baby at one point was out of the question for her. She has since had back surgery and I am not sure if she is able to carry or not but it would probably be a difficult pregnancy for her.

I called her after my FI told me this info just to say hello and no response. I then emailed everyone in my BM that I would need measurements and $$ for the dresses in Feb. -- figuring that this would give her the opportunity
to bow out if she wanted to. I have STILL heard nothing!!! At this point I am and not sure what the hell to do!

Ladies, any advice would be welcome.

Also as a side note, my FI is close to her brother-in-law and he hasn't mentioned anything about my BM condition, so I am not sure if she wants it to be public knowledge, but DAMN call me and say something!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Am I being unreasonable???

Does this lack of response from you girls mean that I am steadily approaching bridezilladom??

I would definitely be annoyed with your friend. She could at least keep you informed on what she's doing or not doing. It's not that you haven't tried to reach out to her or anything. You have! She just won't respond or won't make the time for you, which is very annoying. Do you know where she lives? I'm all about nipping things in the butt! Drive on over there and talk to her!

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Posted by aliwnec10

I would definitely be annoyed with your friend. She could at least keep you informed on what she's doing or not doing. It's not that you haven't tried to reach out to her or anything. You have! She just won't respond or won't make the time for you, which is very annoying. Do you know where she lives? I'm all about nipping things in the butt! Drive on over there and talk to her!

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Thanks ali. I was beginning to feel crazy. I mean, I understand if she is in a delicate situation and may not want to tell me all of the details, but just a heads up that she may not be able to be in the BP, especially when I am ordering dresses in the next two weeks would be nice!

I would call her and say something along the lines like ...

I know you have a lot going on in your life at the moment and I couldnt be happier for you. I am getting the impression that you may want to step down as a BM. If that is the case, please let me know as I will not be offended by any means. I value our friendship and you being at my wedding will be special regardless if your a BM's or not.


IN addition, it seems like your friend does NOT want to be in the party and is sort of avoiding the issue but is still trying 2 keep in touch (ex the x mas card.) I understand why you would be annoyed and lol

Not sure if this was helpful or not - I tried