BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Thanks for the input - I really appreciate it.
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BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Sorry to hear about this and it is a tough situation, but honestly, I agree with FI.
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by ChristineAE
Sorry to hear about this and it is a tough situation, but honestly, I agree with FI.
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
No, that IS helpful! I don't want people to tell me what I want to hear - I really need brides to tell me what they think. Thanks, Christine. I appreciate your honesty and I do see your point.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Honestly, I'm all for self expression, but it would certainly bother me too. I mean, you're paying so much for this wedding and the one thing that's going to stick out in your pics is her hair. I'd be really upset!!
When it's her wedding she can do whatever she wants but now is not that time. I would def talk to her and ask if she could change it back.![]()
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GL!!
When it's her wedding she can do whatever she wants but now is not that time. I would def talk to her and ask if she could change it back.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by JanuaryBride06
Posted by ChristineAE
Sorry to hear about this and it is a tough situation, but honestly, I agree with FI.
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
No, that IS helpful! I don't want people to tell me what I want to hear - I really need brides to tell me what they think. Thanks, Christine. I appreciate your honesty and I do see your point.
God Bless You and your your open mind! Some people would have flipped b/c of this. Just being honest as you would be with me.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
I just thought I'd add, because I used to have pink hair. If you have everyone wear updo's, it looks less dramatic.
Plus, it's a nice splash of color. Unless the dresses clash, which would be unfortunate.
Good luck, and I agree with Cristine- it's really refreshing to hear someone actually appreciate an opinion!
Plus, it's a nice splash of color. Unless the dresses clash, which would be unfortunate.
Good luck, and I agree with Cristine- it's really refreshing to hear someone actually appreciate an opinion!
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by ChristineAE
Sorry to hear about this and it is a tough situation, but honestly, I agree with FI.
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
well said, I agree. I would do and say nothing if I found myself in a similar situation.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Would I be upset? Yes
Can you do anything about it? No
Sending hugs![]()
![]()
Can you do anything about it? No
Sending hugs
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
She is the only one who is responsible for her own appearance. Can you ask someone to change from blonde to brunette because you don't like it? You probably wouldn't because either color is socially acceptable.
Don't get me wrong. IMO, coloring one's hair an unconventional color is an obvious cry for attention. Especially once one reaches a certain age that is past that of a rebellious teen. It surely is not following current fashion trends.
I think the only reasonable thing you CAN ask for is for whatever color hair she DOES have to be neat and clean. Other than that, I would turn a blind eye and ignore it.
Don't get me wrong. IMO, coloring one's hair an unconventional color is an obvious cry for attention. Especially once one reaches a certain age that is past that of a rebellious teen. It surely is not following current fashion trends.
I think the only reasonable thing you CAN ask for is for whatever color hair she DOES have to be neat and clean. Other than that, I would turn a blind eye and ignore it.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by Naunie
I just thought I'd add, because I used to have pink hair. If you have everyone wear updo's, it looks less dramatic.
Plus, it's a nice splash of color. Unless the dresses clash, which would be unfortunate.
QUOTE]
Thanks for the input!
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
When I was 13 my brother got married. At the time my hair was blue (i know![]()
). My mother said I had to put it back to brown. I was a angry teen and I understood why. She just made me get a non-permanent brown and I put it in the day before the wedding. You could suggest this, what could she say? No? Then whatever, at least you tried....
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
I would think her parents would want her to have brown hair for the wedding. Maybe they will talk to her?
You just have to hope she has enough sense not to color her hair bright pink or green that day. But if she does don't let it bother you!!
You just have to hope she has enough sense not to color her hair bright pink or green that day. But if she does don't let it bother you!!
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
I hate to say this, but I kind of agree with FH. It's her own sense of self expression. That's not say it wouldn't bother me, but I think I would do my best to just go with the flow. And, you never know, by January her hair could be a different color. However, if she solicited my opinion on the subject I would certainly speak up.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
while the right thing to do would be to agree with fh and have everything hunky dory, I would probably ask her to change her hair color.
maybe I am being a little 'bridezilla' in this instance, but this is not a case of someone gaining/losing weight (something VERY hard to do and stems from a variety of different reasons) this is something that can be easily changed back and forth. I would even pay for her to have her hair dyed AND dyed back.
I am all for personal expression, but I'm sorry, I would not want pink hair in my pics after spending thousands on them.
and I am sorry, but your hair, clothes ect do not make you the person you are...you do. she doesn't have to be someone else, she just has to have the hair God gave her for one day. NOT a lot to ask IMO.
there, I guess I am a B1tch.
maybe I am being a little 'bridezilla' in this instance, but this is not a case of someone gaining/losing weight (something VERY hard to do and stems from a variety of different reasons) this is something that can be easily changed back and forth. I would even pay for her to have her hair dyed AND dyed back.
I am all for personal expression, but I'm sorry, I would not want pink hair in my pics after spending thousands on them.
and I am sorry, but your hair, clothes ect do not make you the person you are...you do. she doesn't have to be someone else, she just has to have the hair God gave her for one day. NOT a lot to ask IMO.
there, I guess I am a B1tch.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by JessicaM.
while the right thing to do would be to agree with fh and have everything hunky dory, I would probably ask her to change her hair color.
maybe I am being a little 'bridezilla' in this instance, but this is not a case of someone gaining/losing weight (something VERY hard to do and stems from a variety of different reasons) this is something that can be easily changed back and forth. I would even pay for her to have her hair dyed AND dyed back.
I am all for personal expression, but I'm sorry, I would not want pink hair in my pics after spending thousands on them.
and I am sorry, but your hair, clothes ect do not make you the person you are...you do. she doesn't have to be someone else, she just has to have the hair God gave her for one day. NOT a lot to ask IMO.
there, I guess I am a B1tch.
No - you are NOT a b1tch. And thank you for yet another very honest opinion.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by ChristineAE
Sorry to hear about this and it is a tough situation, but honestly, I agree with FI.
You cannot expect someone to change who they are for you.
It goes the same way that some brides have a BM that gains a lot of weight and they expect them to lose weight for the wedding for 'picture' sake.
Best thing to have done (but unfortunately too late): put someone in your BP that you know inside and out that suits your requirements.
Otherwise, embrace her and welcome her with pink or green or purple hair as she is.
Sorry I'm not helpful...
I somewhat agree that maybe you can't change certain things about people, but is your haircolor really who you are? I dont think it is too much for you to ask her to change her hair back to its normal color. If she says it is because of the costs, tell her you will pay for her to get it colored brown or blonde, and then you will pay for her to change it back.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Don't do anything. Have the family portraits in black and white and you'll never know what color her hair was.
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by hocus
Don't do anything. Have the family portraits in black and white and you'll never know what color her hair was.
I never thought of that!
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
You cannot expect her to change her hair for you. If that is how she likes it, then it is not fair for you to demand she changes it. What if she was very overweight, or something else you did not like. Would you ask her to change it then?
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Re: BM with pink hair - this is not a joke
Posted by LaurenluvsTJ
You cannot expect her to change her hair for you. If that is how she likes it, then it is not fair for you to demand she changes it. What if she was very overweight, or something else you did not like. Would you ask her to change it then?
As I responded earlier, I didn't really see it from that perspective. And I haven't made any demands of her; I really would like to know what other brides think.
And while I think it is far, far easier to change your hair color than your weight, I am not the type of person who would demand that anyone lose weight for me.
