Hello ladies!!! So yesterday was my 'surprise' shower that wasn't really a surprise. I had a good time and despite some major flaws everything turned out nice.
Now to my question: I have 1 MOH, 4 BMs, and 1 JB. My moh, has never been to wedding in her life and has not done a great effort in acting out her responsibilities but then again neither have most of the girls. I have one BM who is my cousin and the oldest of the group who has been the most helpful of them all. Gives me ideas, is doing my favors for the wedding and basically took charge yesterday to make sure everything went smoothly. I feel bad that I didnt label her my MOH instead cuz she sure has been acting like one. I want her to know how much I appreciate her hard work! I am now less than 2 months away from my wedding and would like to honor her in some way. Is it too late to upgrade her to be my matron of honor? Would it be stupid if i asked her now? Or should I just thank her by giving her a nice gift?
Her dress is the same as the other BMs which also wouldnt be fair. Unless I ask her if she wants to do any changes to hers like a sash or something? What do you ladies think?
Sorry its soooo long .... TIA
pjc92980
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
i think that is really nice that you want to give her additional credit for all she has done. but it may cause trouble with your MOH. Its a tough spot bc if your MOH hasnt been in a wedding before (and isnt married) she doesnt know what she should and shouldnt be doing. I have never been in a wedding party and had no idea what is involved until now (with my own wedding right around the corner). If i were in her shoes and had no experience with weddings, i would hope the bride would say to me...can you please help do xyz. IMO i would just thank your BM by giving her an extra nice gift and write out a super sweet card where you share this sentiment with her.
MrsTarricone2B
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
I think you could still upgrade her to MOH if you really want to but IMO she should have the same dress as your other MOH. Did you pick readers yet? Maybe you could honor her by having her do one of your readings.
sujeire
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
I would give her a nice gift to show your appreciation. I wouldn't change her to MOH at this point plus it might bring you some problems. It's too close to your wedding, the less stress the better.
hiswifey2011
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
thanks ladies ... im all for avoiding drama ... guess i will leave it as is and get her a nice gift of appreciation.
rosatemp
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
Posted by hiswifey2011
Hello ladies!!! So yesterday was my 'surprise' shower that wasn't really a surprise. I had a good time and despite some major flaws everything turned out nice.
Now to my question: I have 1 MOH, 4 BMs, and 1 JB. My moh, has never been to wedding in her life and has not done a great effort in acting out her responsibilities but then again neither have most of the girls. I have one BM who is my cousin and the oldest of the group who has been the most helpful of them all. Gives me ideas, is doing my favors for the wedding and basically took charge yesterday to make sure everything went smoothly. I feel bad that I didnt label her my MOH instead cuz she sure has been acting like one. I want her to know how much I appreciate her hard work! I am now less than 2 months away from my wedding and would like to honor her in some way. Is it too late to upgrade her to be my matron of honor? Would it be stupid if i asked her now? Or should I just thank her by giving her a nice gift?
Her dress is the same as the other BMs which also wouldnt be fair. Unless I ask her if she wants to do any changes to hers like a sash or something? What do you ladies think?
Sorry its soooo long .... TIA
i am going through the same thing and i just posted about it as well..im going to talk to my matron and see if on her own of course wll backdown since she hasnt helped and has no time...gl
ImgonnabeMrsC
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
Although its such a nice gesture of asking another girl to be a moh, I wouldn't. I have the same idea rolling around my brain about one of my close friends, bc my sister moved to California and she's never been in a wedding so she doesnt' really know what she should do, plus it is going to be too hard for her to come home alot. (She justttt moved there bc her fiance is in the military so I didnt even know she was going to go to CA!) I would get her a nice gift :)
ColliMac23
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Re: Bridal Party Question!!
I originally had just my younger sister as my Maid of Honor and then I realized she was in my shoes for my Older sister's wedding and thought she could use some help. So I asked my older sister to be me Matron of Honor. I am very happy I did this and it was no offense to anyone because I did it because I could have the both of them. Ultimately it was a good move because my older sister is doing above and beyond any expectations I had of them and she deserves to be noticed for it.
I wouldn't change it now because it will start drama unless you think the MOH just doesn't really care enough. I would give her a reading at the church and give her a nice gift. I am going to do that for my girls whoever put in a lot will get a nicer present and my sister's are getting massage's spray tan clutch jewelry etc.
