Bridesmaid advice

Hi girls-just wondering about your viewpoint on this. Almost two years ago I was a bridesmaid in my friends wedding. We have been friends since 9th grade.
As we've gotten older, things changed and we are not as close anymore.
For example, when I told her I was engaged she congratulated me, and then said 'we moved into a house a few days ago' and didn't say anything more about the engagement...not even the typical question of how did he propose? And I had no idea she was even moving at all so it seemed so random that she said that. Of course I am happy for her but her response was so typical of her and a very big reason why we are not close anymore.
Anyway, I am not planning to ask her to be in my bridal party. Should I talk about this with her since I was in her wedding or should I just not bring it up at all? Thanks ladies!

Um, do we have a mutual friend!? LOL

My friend and I have been super close since we were 11. She got married in 2010 and I was a BM at her wedding. Went above and beyond the call of duty (we'll leave it at that!) and then things started to shift. She started giving me lame excuses as to why she couldn't hang out. She seemed miserable in her life and there was nothing I could do to fix it. So I had to talk to her and tell her how I felt. Things have been strained ever since. We stopped talking for a few months then she started talking to me a week before her baby shower that I felt I HAD to go to. Then I got engaged Christmas Eve, I got a generic Congrats and that was it. Which is fine, but when I went to see the baby she didn't even ask to see the ring until one of her friends came in and asked it. She never asked how he did it. We're just at different chapters of our lives and it seems she can't be happy for me. The last time I spoke to her was when I dropped off dinner for her and her husband the day after they brought the baby home...Ugh I'm rambling, in the end, I decided to NOT ask her to stand by my side that day. I have four amazing girls that I've known just as long and one is a VERY good friend of hers as well. I felt like I was a weird position but our mutual friend said 'it's your day, what you and her are going through is separate from us...' I haven't discussed this with her at all. I don't think you owe it to anyone to have them in your party. I wanted people who have been there in the past and I know for certain will be there in the future and she didn't make the cut!

You guys are right! I won't mention it to her.
Haha nikole! Really- are we talking about the same person? Lol!

This is just ONE of the reasons why I didn't want a bridal party... picked just my sister as my MOH and don't have to deal with other drama!

Hope it all works out for you... do what you feel is right, it's your day after all.

I'm sorry to hear this! As everyone else is saying, there is no need to mention anything to her. It seems like it is mutually understood and there's no need to cause any unnecessary awkwardness. Good luck!
http://newyorkremix.blogspot.com/

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Posted by NIKOLE

Um, do we have a mutual friend!? LOL

My friend and I have been super close since we were 11. She got married in 2010 and I was a BM at her wedding. Went above and beyond the call of duty (we'll leave it at that!) and then things started to shift. She started giving me lame excuses as to why she couldn't hang out. She seemed miserable in her life and there was nothing I could do to fix it. So I had to talk to her and tell her how I felt. Things have been strained ever since. We stopped talking for a few months then she started talking to me a week before her baby shower that I felt I HAD to go to. Then I got engaged Christmas Eve, I got a generic Congrats and that was it. Which is fine, but when I went to see the baby she didn't even ask to see the ring until one of her friends came in and asked it. She never asked how he did it. We're just at different chapters of our lives and it seems she can't be happy for me. The last time I spoke to her was when I dropped off dinner for her and her husband the day after they brought the baby home...Ugh I'm rambling, in the end, I decided to NOT ask her to stand by my side that day. I have four amazing girls that I've known just as long and one is a VERY good friend of hers as well. I felt like I was a weird position but our mutual friend said 'it's your day, what you and her are going through is separate from us...' I haven't discussed this with her at all. I don't think you owe it to anyone to have them in your party. I wanted people who have been there in the past and I know for certain will be there in the future and she didn't make the cut!

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I have a friend like that too. except I was never in her wedding since she's not married she's also more annoying I think lol. I've just known her for years. when we got engaged I mean it was all over fb, and I sent her a text, email on fb. heard nothing! yet I saw her posting pictures of rainbows (there was a rainbow out I guess) we were up in Canada so I wasn't calling anyone besides my family and my BFF. so yeah after weeks she finally said congrats claiming she was busy (uh huh) never asked how he did it, never asked about ring, never asked anything. of course she'd eventually complain if I really wanted her to know I would have called. sorry but I think everyone should be able to read text messages or fb messages esp if I'm out of the country and I think every call was $2.

the only time she finally said something again was when I posted pictures of my goody bags I made for my girls & how I asked them. which was to yell at me and say how she was crying because I didn't make her one. that how could I not make her a bm. and years ago when I was engaged to someone else she was going to be a bm or well she keeps saying moh though she wasn't, though years ago she kept hounding to be moh I never made her one. basically she tried her hardest to make me feel bad.

now anytime I talk to her all she does is talk about how she can't believe she's not a bm and we're known each other so long and she can't believe it. and how she'll probably cry at my wedding for not being a bm. she never asks me anything! oh and she loves to bash all the girls I have in my bridal party. or talk about her friend's wedding. this is a girl who yes I've known for years but I never hang out with anymore. my fh doesn't even really know her. he's met her like twice. and her theory is people can still be best friends and never see each other or hang out. I mean maybe a few months but when it's been years? and she insists if she had been a bm she would have had time to hang out etc. she also never asked to see my ring until I shoved it in her face and said see my ring lol.

so yeah I've gone on long enough here lol. she just irks me so much. to me I think it should be whoever you want in your bp, not because you feel you have to make them a bm, or anything like that. and def no one should act like my friend and yell at a person for not being in the bp. my moh/bff isn't having me in hers because she has a big family and I've never yelled at her or gotten upset lol.

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Posted by Diorprincess

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Posted by NIKOLE

Um, do we have a mutual friend!? LOL

My friend and I have been super close since we were 11. She got married in 2010 and I was a BM at her wedding. Went above and beyond the call of duty (we'll leave it at that!) and then things started to shift. She started giving me lame excuses as to why she couldn't hang out. She seemed miserable in her life and there was nothing I could do to fix it. So I had to talk to her and tell her how I felt. Things have been strained ever since. We stopped talking for a few months then she started talking to me a week before her baby shower that I felt I HAD to go to. Then I got engaged Christmas Eve, I got a generic Congrats and that was it. Which is fine, but when I went to see the baby she didn't even ask to see the ring until one of her friends came in and asked it. She never asked how he did it. We're just at different chapters of our lives and it seems she can't be happy for me. The last time I spoke to her was when I dropped off dinner for her and her husband the day after they brought the baby home...Ugh I'm rambling, in the end, I decided to NOT ask her to stand by my side that day. I have four amazing girls that I've known just as long and one is a VERY good friend of hers as well. I felt like I was a weird position but our mutual friend said 'it's your day, what you and her are going through is separate from us...' I haven't discussed this with her at all. I don't think you owe it to anyone to have them in your party. I wanted people who have been there in the past and I know for certain will be there in the future and she didn't make the cut!

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I have a friend like that too. except I was never in her wedding since she's not married she's also more annoying I think lol. I've just known her for years. when we got engaged I mean it was all over fb, and I sent her a text, email on fb. heard nothing! yet I saw her posting pictures of rainbows (there was a rainbow out I guess) we were up in Canada so I wasn't calling anyone besides my family and my BFF. so yeah after weeks she finally said congrats claiming she was busy (uh huh) never asked how he did it, never asked about ring, never asked anything. of course she'd eventually complain if I really wanted her to know I would have called. sorry but I think everyone should be able to read text messages or fb messages esp if I'm out of the country and I think every call was $2.

the only time she finally said something again was when I posted pictures of my goody bags I made for my girls & how I asked them. which was to yell at me and say how she was crying because I didn't make her one. that how could I not make her a bm. and years ago when I was engaged to someone else she was going to be a bm or well she keeps saying moh though she wasn't, though years ago she kept hounding to be moh I never made her one. basically she tried her hardest to make me feel bad.

now anytime I talk to her all she does is talk about how she can't believe she's not a bm and we're known each other so long and she can't believe it. and how she'll probably cry at my wedding for not being a bm. she never asks me anything! oh and she loves to bash all the girls I have in my bridal party. or talk about her friend's wedding. this is a girl who yes I've known for years but I never hang out with anymore. my fh doesn't even really know her. he's met her like twice. and her theory is people can still be best friends and never see each other or hang out. I mean maybe a few months but when it's been years? and she insists if she had been a bm she would have had time to hang out etc. she also never asked to see my ring until I shoved it in her face and said see my ring lol.

so yeah I've gone on long enough here lol. she just irks me so much. to me I think it should be whoever you want in your bp, not because you feel you have to make them a bm, or anything like that. and def no one should act like my friend and yell at a person for not being in the bp. my moh/bff isn't having me in hers because she has a big family and I've never yelled at her or gotten upset lol.

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Baahahhahahah Best.Story.Ever! Please, I got engaged ON long island but b/c it was almost midnight on Christmas Eve, I had to keep my call list to a minimum!