Hmm interesting.. I dont' know if this would be our 'gift'.. I guess it depends how much $ it comes to. This friend IS a good friend and she's one of my BM's too.. so I don't want to burn any bridges.
elp6421
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
In my experiences, the MOB usually pays for the shower. Every wedding I have been in, I have come early to set up and decorate but never anything substantial financially.
The b-party is a total different story. I think that is something MOH and bridesmaids split.
madamsireeda213
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
Posted by LMEL1223
I have been a BM in a few bridal parties where I was asked to split the shower with all the other BMs and the MOH ... However, this was considered our gift to the bride and so instead of buying her shower gifts we threw her the shower.
I agree. I was a BM in several weddings and we did the same thing, we basically split the cost of the bacherlotte party and the bridal shower amongst the BP. In most situactions I was involved in, the bride's mom either throw a separate shower or had some contributions to the shower we threw but couldnt afford to pay for the whole thing by herself. I know for me I want my BP to pay for the bacherlotte party and the bridal shower equally and if my mom wants to throw a separate one she could do so.
aquag12283
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
I think it depends on the situation. I think for mine my sister, mom and maybe FSIL(she's a BM) and FMIL may help pay for it.
LMEL1223
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
It is a decision you should make with all the other BMs and MOH ... if it is alot of money BM might forgo a gift ... If not the you might all chip in to get her a nice gift that she really wants
jenhef
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
I think normally (or at least for the showers I have been to) the mom of the bride throws the shower and the BM's and MOH do the extras and cutesy stuff. Its enough they are helping pay for the bachelorette party
silyss
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
I am not sure what her mom is doing.. and I can't exactly ASK, you know?
DaniandKen2010
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
Posted by silyss
I am not sure what her mom is doing.. and I can't exactly ASK, you know?
I would ask the MOH if the MOB is contributing. If she says No, dont push the issue. If she says yes then ask how everything is being divided.
You can ask just do it in a polite way.
TheFutureMrs2011
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Re: Bridesmaid responsibilities?!
I agree, it is totally situational... Every wedding I've been in the MOB has paid for the shower, and asked nothing of the BP except to show up, help with opening and buys gifts... I was in one wedding though where the mom kinda refused to pay for the BS so we were asked to split it... the MOH eventually asked the brides mom to chip in, but we're still contributing the same amount to pay for the place, splitting the cost of decorations, wishing well, etc., and paying for gifts and group gifts.. It really is a lot, but we can't do anything about it because we want to make sure she has a great shower... In your case, I think if the responsibility is falling on the MOH solely and you all have the means to help, you should (unless she doesn't need you to).. As for the b-party, unless someone is offering to pay for it, it is usually the MOH and BM who pay their own way and each kick in a little extra to pay for the bride
