BTDT Moms...How do you?

How do you get past the 'fear' of letting go? Ryan is crawling like a champ but in a fairly confined space. My upstairs is all (except for the bedrooms) hardwood floors and the kitchen is ceramic tile. I would love to let him crawl around the kitchen while I make dinner, etc. but since all he wants to do is pull himself up to standing I'm a wreck that he'll smash his head on the tile floor !!

Same with the hardwoods. Even downstairs where my office is carpeted, I'm so paranoid about him wacking his head on the desk or finding some little piece of something on the carpet and eating it, etc. etc. I don't want to 'hold him back' but I'm having a real hard time 'letting him go'...

...same with feeding him table food. Especially with the allergy scare. I'm just paranoid about finding the right foods to give him and how much and etc. etc. I think back to all the other things I was 'afraid' of in the beginning and they all worked themselves out but how do you let him go when now the chance for him getting hurt is so much greater?? We're babyproofing, etc. but I just can't seem to do it - when we're in the kitchen, I 'trap' him in his highchair or the exersaucer...it's probably not fair to him but at least I know he's safe. How do you do it???

Lee, I feel for you. I understand completely how you feel b/c I've had Paul 'trapped' in the den for months! LOL! Seriously tho....one of the reasons we invested SO MUCH money in the safety gates is b/c we felt the den (with carpeting) would be a safer environment for Paul to learn his boundaries/limitations and also (unfortunately) suffer some hard knocks.

After several months and two trips to the ER, I can confidently tell you that there's NOTHING truly that you can do to protect them from everything, UNLESS you are willing to pad your entire house with Nerf. As that is not a realistic option, you'll have to compromise.

I agree that Ryan should be in the exersaucer or highchair while in the kitchen. The truth is, ceramic is an unforgiving surface to ANYONE - much less an infant....so, keeping him safe should be the number one priority. However, have you tried the pack-n-play instead? That at least gives him a greater feeling of movement and he can also get some much needed practice in the pulling up and standing departments. I personally would not let him roam freely on the tile until he's walking and much stronger and more stable on his feet. In our house, we have a rule for Paul - he MUST be wearing shoes to walk around the kitchen! Socks are deadly - even to a 'big boy' who knows how to walk very well (and also LOVES to run! )

We still our safety gate up in the den, but we don't really use it much anymore (we keep the gate part open). Paul is allowed to move from room to room as he pleases - but only when Mommy or Daddy is around to supervise his every move. Things happen in milliseconds with kids, so if you think you'll be 'tied up' with something for awhile, they need to be confined to a specific area for their own safety. Don't worry - you'll know when it's time to allow Ryan more freedom!!

Claud - you make me feel so much better! I guess you just get more confidence in your own judgement as you go along - Ryan stays trapped at least in the kitchen (and possibly in the den!)


The ER twice already?? I don't know if I'm prepared for this...

Lee, I think you have to go with instinct alot and of course with keeping a VERY close eye on them...

When John Anthony has free reign of the house I follow him around, and if lets say he wants go to his room, I'll shut the door and we can spend a good half hour in there...

My kitchen is not tile, so its not as dangerous, but Im still extra careful because of the soaps/detergents under the sink (which I plan to move, thats another post I meant to start)...
So I do let him run around and explore, but only when he has my undivided wont even pick up the phone attention...
When I need to get things done, he's in the great room, which is very spacious (carpeted) but since its still not 100% toddler-safe, Im always in the kitchen (next room) peeking in there every minute as I clean/cook, etc....

So its hard, but based on how your home is situated, and how your daily schedule goes, you have to use your gut, give him his 'roaming time' and watch him carefully.
When you cant watch him as much, the exersaucer is GREAT, they love it ! The packnplay they dont love as much, but having that alone time to play is also healthy for their imaginations

Are there any good-grip slippers that you can get him for in the kitchen so he wont slip?
JA has a pair of slippers with a rubbery type bottom so that he wont slip as easily...

Im sure you'll get better with experience and with seeing how he likes each room and what he'll do next

Youre doing GREAT mommy!

You got some great advice already here from some Super Mommies.

I want to add that I found the age when Luke was quite mobile, pulling up on stuff but not super steady the most 'fearful' time, which I guess is Ryan's age now. I was on top of him so much because there was the chance of him falling so easily but he was Mr. Fearless. But then he grew into cruising and while you still have to watch of course, it gets easier. That's what I found.