I hate to do another pouty post...but I am surprised by the people who RSVP'ed no, even though I went to their wedding. In the case of one family member, I did her makeup and paid for all the products. Several others I traveled across the country for, sometimes immediately after working all night. Maybe not everyone feels the same way, but I would move heaven and earth to be at a family member or close friend's wedding. I'm just surprised the people I traveled for, (and for years I lived in Minnesota so everything was a big trip), can't find a way to be there for me. At the end of the day I am going to have to be happy for the people who are coming, and enjoy the day. I'm just not there yet.
Snowflake08
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
i went through this as well there were 3 girls that didnt come, one that i seriously planned her whole wedding, made her cp's and invites
it was upsetting at first, but when all is in perspective - the people that want to be there will be
im sorry
Cutechef729
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
You are still being positive even though you are bummed!! Don't worry-in addition to all of your guests, you have us to be excited for you!
AllyDrew1108
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i am totally going to be feeling your pain in a few months. i won't be as positive as you will though, i'm a big baby when it comes to this sorta thing
FutureMrsCarrieri
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Posted by Newsysuzy12
I hate to do another pouty post...but I am surprised by the people who RSVP'ed no, even though I went to their wedding. In the case of one family member, I did her makeup and paid for all the products. Several others I traveled across the country for, sometimes immediately after working all night. Maybe not everyone feels the same way, but I would move heaven and earth to be at a family member or close friend's wedding. I'm just surprised the people I traveled for, (and for years I lived in Minnesota so everything was a big trip), can't find a way to be there for me. At the end of the day I am going to have to be happy for the people who are coming, and enjoy the day. I'm just not there yet.
This is what made me pull back and be less generous with people. Like you, there was nothing I wouldn't do for friends and family. But that sentiment was too often not reciprocated and I was really tired of feeling like 'Damn, it wouldn't have killed them to make more of an effort'
I had a 'good' friend whose comatose father was dying in a hospice. I went there (without exaggerating) about 4 times a week to keep the mother company. I would bring her snacks and puzzles to work on. I would sit with her for hours on end because I felt like she needed the company and I wanted to be supportive. Soon after I needed some support myself -- suddenly my 'good' friend couldn't be bothered.
???????????
People effin suck. The people who really matter will be there on your wedding day with tears in their eyes as they marvel at how beautiful you look...
Newsysuzy12
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
Thanks for the support everyone....I helps to know other people go through this. Sometimes I look at the board with all the people who have 98% yes's and I feel a bit of envy. I also have to remember I have not heard from most of the people, I am sure it will turn around. Chef you really made me smile!
jeanyus27
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
i felt the same way about some of my cousins. I've been to there showers, weddings, baby showers, christenings and a few responded no with no reason as to why. One of my cousins was married twice and i went to BOTH of her weddings and she didn't come cuz she had to work, which wasn't an acceptable excuse to me since she's a bartender and knew about the wedding for a year!
Valerie-Joe
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I'm going through the same thing! Ugh! It's comforting to hear someone else is going through it too. I'm sorry you are though. It *****!
NYCGirl2008
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A bunch of my close friends won't be able to come and I also went to their wedding, but it's ok with me. They all got married many years ago and now have 2+ kids, some of which with needs. I know if they could make it, they would. And that's what counts.
Kittyg19
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
Sounds like you hold yourself to a high standard in terms of making sure you are there for family and friends. Its really hard when its not being reciprocated. Enjoy your day I know its disappointing but i'm sure it will be great.
JodyLC
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
I am worried about the same thing.... I know I have went way over to help out some people and in the end I have a feeling I will those who actually appreciated it. Just remember it will be a great day without them and their lost.
roan126
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I'm so sorry you are going through that.....I understand completely. I'm the exact same way you are ....I will do anything I possibly can to attend the wedding of someone I care about. It was a hard lesson learned that not everyone thinks the same way.
chrispar
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I am so sorry that you are going through this. I have learned many things that I will never forget during this wedding process. It really stinks
LoriBeth2728
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Yeah, i don't think any of my extended family is going to come and it totally ***** that they won't even try.
KK Holiday
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it's ok to be upset by this. but like some of the other girls said--people that want to be there WILL be thats all that matters!
Lil83108
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I would be upset too! I sometimes feel that I go out of my way for everyone else and now that it is mine and FH's time certain people that we expect to be there for us aren't. In our case they aren't there for us emotionally, but will be there physically and at this point we would rather they weren't.
Don't worry on that day you won't even be thinking about this.
jessnstu08
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
i am so sorry you are going through this. It is totally unfair that you have gone above and beyond for some people who cannot do the same for you , for whatever reason . I am the same way for my family/close friends, there is no way I would miss my dear friends wedding wedding !
Kimbalina
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I understand how you feel. I am sure that I will be in your situation too. It must hurt when you get un-expected no's.
Jamnike
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
most of my family has rsvpd no too
bluekat16
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Re: but I went to their wedding!
A couple of people who have recieved the STD already told me they can't make it...some of which I've been to their weddings...it's a little disheartening..but what can you do right?
