Can someone help calm me down!

JandJ1224 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:46 AM

Can someone help calm me down!

Last night was FH's bachelor party. The guys went to AC. WE had discussed and both agreed no strippers. His gm were well aware of that desicon. WELL AWARE! He calls me this mornign and tells me they hired a stripper to come to the hotel room (totally skeezy) He said it was a whole big drama he will tell me about it when he gets home. Now these are supposed to be the guys he is closest too. They can't respect us or our decision. I am fumming right now. I am ready to call the tuxedo shop and cancel their tuxes because I do not want these guys being any part of my wedding!!!!!!! I am beyond pissed and hysterical.

LandsEnd06 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:48 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Try to take a deep breath. I know that is bothers you but FH knows how you feel so I am sure it wasn't anything crazy. Hang in there. When does he come home?

JandJ1224 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:49 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

THey stopped for breakfast before they leave...so a few hours I guess

LandsEnd06 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:50 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Ok he will be home soon then. Why don't you go do something for you for a few hours? SHopping? Massage? gym? Something fun that might help take your mind off things.

JandJ1224 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:53 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Thanks so much! It really helps having someone there to talk to.

LandsEnd06 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:54 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

No problem! Glad I can be here to help!

How are the plans? I am the day after you!!!

sarahradio5 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 10:56 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

eewww... IN room?? That is SO disrespectful to you and your FH's decision. I don't blame you for being upset! But - the fact that your FH TOLD you is commendable. Was it something that sounded like he had no choice in the matter? I mean... he couldn't just leave... his friends would be all over him if he did. Well, he could have, I guess. But then they would say he's 'whipped' and all that stuff... he was in a tough spot. Don't be mad at FH... be mad at the groomsmen. Talk to your FH and say that they don't deserve to be treated to their tuxes if they can't respect your wishes.

My FH is going to AC tonight for his Bach party... I asked if they were going to a strip club, and he said 'No, we're just getting hookers'. Ha Ha. He's such a comedian.

I don't know what he's doing. Don't want to know. But I trust him.

JIFFY Posted: Oct 07, 2006 11:00 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Don't be mad at FH bc he had no idea they were doing it and he did call to tell you about it.

Be calm when he gets home. Give him a hug and kiss hello. Ask him if you can get him anything to drink. Then sit down and calmly asked what happened. He will not give you details if he knows you are angry. Would you tell FH stuff if you knew he was angry? If your calm and open i'm sure he will give you every detail. Be interested. Ask ??'s. - Then what happened? This way you get all the info and the truth that you need to make a decision on how you are going to handle the situation. If you find yourself getting mad, then excuse yourself and say you have to go to the bathroom. Take a minute to calm down and go right back out there.

As far as the groomsmen go...I would really tell each of them that it was very disrespectful and distasteful to do hire a stripper.

It's hard to trust people when they don't keep thier word!

CLMon7906 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 11:08 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

My @#@%$%^*&*(*(^#$%$@$#@%$%^%&^#^%@#^$&^&%^$^%%&*&^#&^(*&(*%^#%$@$%^%&^ BIL did the same thing. Even though he knew the rule: strippers ONLY in a strip club, he PURPOSELY did the hotel thing.

Joke is on him....DH fell asleep in another room [from being drunk] right after she arrived.

All that money wasted...could've just gone to bars and clubs and spent far less!

sfmullen Posted: Oct 07, 2006 11:44 AM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

I am sure he has a good story and it sounds like FH is made at his GM too! If I were you I would go get my nails done or something and then when he gets home talk about it. I am sure he is as pissed off as you are!

HelenZ Posted: Oct 07, 2006 01:20 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

When it comes time for my FH to have his, I really hope it doesn't involve a stripper coming to a hotel room....I'd much prefer him just going to a strip club (in fact I expect him to, which makes it easier for me to take when it happens).

As far as your GM's...they probably wanted the strippers for themselves lol.....don't be upset with FH he only gets one bachelor party and just be happy its at least over. Unfortunately there's not much you can say or do to reverse the fact that they went against what the 2 of you wanted. Just make sure you see them before your wedding day....you don't want your first encounter with them after this to be on your big day- then you'll be really angry!!

Shorty McBride Posted: Oct 07, 2006 01:22 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

How incredibly disrespectful can they be?!

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. FH should be home soon

eden Posted: Oct 07, 2006 01:27 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

So sorry you have to deal with those GM, don't worry about it though. The important thing is your FH is totally trustworthy. Even if his GM aren't.

Talk to FH about it when he gets back and get yourself that massage or anything to get your mind off this incident!

You don't wanna be upset when FH gets back because those guys are still his good friends after all so he will be abit protective of them... :)

luvabul Posted: Oct 07, 2006 03:49 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

trust me i would be hysterical pissed too, but TRUST ur DH, hes marrying you because he loves you....and u know how these friends are!! argh

anyways hope all is welll , fell better

pixiechickie Posted: Oct 07, 2006 04:05 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

I'd Kill

mnducc Posted: Oct 07, 2006 05:18 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Oh my GOD - I hate the whole Freakin BP thing....I think it is so stupid....you had your entire single life to get that out of ur system & now that u finally found the person u want to have & to hold for rest ur life - lets go hurt that person by going and having 1 last hur ra with the boys.
I don't get it.... but u better beleive that if he was going I was too!! I think that they just don't realize how it makes us feel & it's just what is supposed to happen at a BP - But if you put it into perspective & c how he would feel if you had a hot naked guy rubbing his u-no against ur cheek- he may understand.
A long time ago I made it very clear that strippers in a hotel room is completely different than going to a club and if that's what he wanted he could marry someone else.......That goes for going to other guys BP's too. I didn't say anything to his groomsmen (that was in his place) but I can tell you that if it did happen & he didnt leave - that would be very serious for us-that his respect for me better be his 1st priority. But I did make sure that he knew all this before he went .....but in the end he's only going to do what he wants to anyway, so if he loves u & want to marry u - I don't think you have anything to worry about.

tricia3381 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 06:28 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

Posted by sarahradio5

eewww... IN room?? That is SO disrespectful to you and your FH's decision. I don't blame you for being upset! But - the fact that your FH TOLD you is commendable. Was it something that sounded like he had no choice in the matter? I mean... he couldn't just leave... his friends would be all over him if he did. Well, he could have, I guess. But then they would say he's 'whipped' and all that stuff... he was in a tough spot. Don't be mad at FH... be mad at the groomsmen. Talk to your FH and say that they don't deserve to be treated to their tuxes if they can't respect your wishes.

My FH is going to AC tonight for his Bach party... I asked if they were going to a strip club, and he said 'No, we're just getting hookers'. Ha Ha. He's such a comedian.

I don't know what he's doing. Don't want to know. But I trust him.

i couldn't agree more. don't be mad at FH, his friends put him in an awkward position.

i also with agree with sara with regard to the i don't want to know what u do at ur b-party, but i trust u.

sfmullen Posted: Oct 07, 2006 07:54 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

after I read this thread I went to FH and told him I absolutely dont mind if he goes to a strip club BUT NO WAY IN HELL DO I WANT STRIPPERS IN HIS HOTEL ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And he said he doesnt want strippers at all but it is not up to him actually he said and I quote ' this party isnt for me it is for the guys throwing it they dont care what I want' so I saud if they get you strippers in a hotel room you better walk your a$$ out!

ncd623 Posted: Oct 07, 2006 08:00 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

I hate to say this but boys will be boys and although they disrespected you both, I am sure because they are men they thought it would not be a big deal. Life is too short, he told you about it and that is what matters. Let it go and save your energy for the big day and all the planning.

Mooshyboo Posted: Oct 07, 2006 08:41 PM

Re: Can someone help calm me down!

I would be so mad too ~ very disrespectful ~ especially since you both agreed and they GM were well aware of both your decision! I would be PO'd! Breathe! Breath! and here are some for you!