Ok girls....I need to vent. My aunt is totally driving me crazy to the point where I may kill her. My two cousins are in the bridal party and I have been asking my aunt for weeks to go out with me to find a flower girl dress for my cousin. Well last week she calls me and tells me that she bought a dress on sale at Macy's for $35. So of course I was a little nervous because i would have liked to have seen it. Well....she comes over the other day and it is bubblegum pink and looks like an easter dress not a flower girl dress...and I specifically told her I wanted my cousin to where to wear white. So she gets all huffy puffy and annoyed and says she will bring it back but she will not be able to go out and look for another dress until May 23. Well hello Bitch but my wedding is August 8th. Do you really think I want to run around at the last minute to look for a dress because you have to be spiteful and cheap. So anyway...i went to tri-county flea market yesterday and found a really cute dree for $70 so I called her to tell her about the dress and she said she didin't want to spend that much when my cousin would only be wearing the dress one time. Can you believe that? So i told her that that was actually cheap and she wasn't going to find anything cheaper. So Now i am really ****ed off. I can't stand her cheapness and I'm really thinking about telling her that I'm not going to have the kids in the wedding. i do feel bad to do that but I am have a black-tie optional wedding..and am spending a lot of money I'm not going to give in and have a frumpy flower girl because she is so cheap. Then what will happen when she has to get the tux for my other cousin...is that going to be a problem too. Any advice?
WithThisRing
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I am sorry you have to go through this.
Best advice: Kick her in the shins, then borrow her wallet while she's down and use her credit card to buy the dress
Sorry....
Tell her that you put a lot of thought and planning into this wedding and those are the dresses you as the bride have chosen. If she doesnt like it fine, but that will mean her children will not be in the wedding.
Its mean, but she is being mean to you and its not fair to you. You dont need this stress.
cutsabutton
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
Dani, I know exactly what you mean...I'm fed up with it so I decided to buy the FG dress myself! I've been scouting ebay...they seem to have some really nice dresses that don't cost that much. I'm considering this
I think you need to explain this to her face to face. If she doesn't get it, then take her daughter out. I know that some may consider it rude, but it's your day. Or perhaps you want to spli the cost with her? That will shut her up!
JodiBabe
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I agree with Chip but I'd add if she doesnt want to get it then she will have to tell her childrenwhy they will not be in the wedding with you right there so she doesn't say it is your fault!!!!!!
cutsabutton
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
Or maybe this one... Don't get worked up over your aunt's craziness. If you really want your little niece to be in the BP, maybe you can work out a deal with your aunt...like, if all she's willing to pay is 35 bucks tell her you'll cover the rest of the cost provided you get to choose the dress.
why couldnt she get the dress while returning the other dress... at this point maybe you should give her the difference between the $35 she will spend, and the dress you like... its best to keep peace with family members.
cuteypie
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
i agree, split the cost and everyones happy
maysie18
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I too think you should split the cost, if for no other reason but your own sanity.
It may actually be better if you get the dress closer to yoru wedding date. If the girl grows at all you may end up up going shopping again anyway. Good luck! & definitely check out Ebay.
Bacardi527
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
This is your wedding and she should have known that she would have to spend a more than normal- and she should not have accepted if money was a issue I think that the dress you found is very reasonable- your not going to make everyone happy all the time- I dont think that people realize what theyre responsibility is when they accept to be in a wedding- Im the type of person that would want to hurt anyones feelings but i tell them like it is- Good luck
jennbaby
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
When I had my first FG (long story) I bought the dress myself instead of dealing with idiots. Save yourself the headache & buy one you like & ask her for nothing!
Dani00518
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
Thanks girls....I looked on ebay and found a few dresses that I loved. Maybe those can be an option for my aunt. I know it would be easier for me to just buy the dress but my aunt is not a poor person. She has a lot of money and that is what is really bugging me...how can you be so cheap. It's not like I am some bum off the street. I'm her niece and she should really stop being so tight.
Also, what is going to happen when my other cousin needs to rent a tux...am I going to have to pay for that to...because now we are talking about another $50 bucks and that is for something she can't even keep. AHHHHHHH she makes me nuts!!
deby
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I dont know if you were planning to get them gifts for being in the bridal party- if you were, then get them the dress and tux as the bridal party gift.
desyre
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
There is a small shop in the city, down the block from RK Bridal. It has really nice flower girl dresses and the acessories to go with it (they custom make any color you want them to) and it is really inexpensive. I couldn't believe it when I went there. I cannot remember the exact street or name but if anyone wantsthe address, they can FM me and I will ask my FSIL (she brought a dress from there).
Stacey1403
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
Who's sister is she? Have either your Mother or Father talk to her. You don't want to punish this little girl because her mother is an idiot. She is probably looking forward to being your flowergirl(depending on her age) I hope it works out for you!
pschica
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
maybe you can search in the communion dress section and it'll be cheaper???
jess2504
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
We have a few cheap people in our family too; I would say give her a few days to change her mind. She knows she will look bad and cause problems if she does not change her mind. If nothing changes in a few days then talk to her. Maybe you could split the cost with her.
cluelessbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I wouldn't let your niece suffer - split the cost or just buy the dress yourself, same for renting the tux. For aprox. $150 it's worth your sanity and not having the kids caught in the middle.
dino1109
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I agree with Stacey- Have your mom or dad talk to her. She should understand what you are going through though. I never understand why people make stressful things even more difficult with their input! While I don't think you should give in to pay 1/2 - i also don't think your cousins should be punished on behave of their *****y mother. So i guess give in and help pay- but make sure someone other than you (mom or dad) tell her how she is acting!!!
taraalissa
Posted:
Member since
Re: Can't stand her anymore (long)
I went thru a very similar thing (feel free to check my old post entitled 'flowergirl dress nightmare'). The best advice I can give you is this....... This too will pass. It will work itself out even if it doesn't seem like it. Try to stay out of it and let somebody else deal with her. There is no point in letting her aggravate you, you have other stuff to deal with.
