So FH and I own a home and have lived together for the past year. We have our first meeting with our priest (I have met him but now have a meeting as a couple).
Past brides, current ones, etc; did you tell this to your priest, how did he react? The closer it gets the more nervous I am.
FutureMrsLehmann
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Re: Catholic & Living together
It's pretty common these days. I really doubt your priest will be shocked or horrified by the news,
missK
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I think they are ok with it. We are having st paddys day dinner with the priest and I truely believe he totally knows. Listen with all that goes on in the world I think that its really not that bad
chrissybean77
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Re: Catholic & Living together
The 1st time we met with our priest we weren't living together, but we were in the midst of purchasing a house. He didn't ask us our plans as far as would we be living together once the house was purchased and we didn't volunteer the info. I don't think that it is that big of a deal though. They didn't have a problem when my brother and SIL went to get married in the church and were already living together and pregnant.
PegaLega
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Re: Catholic & Living together
We told him and he didnt even bat an eye really. I think it really is the norm these days for alot of couples to be living together-I personally think its immensely important but to each his own.
Cpt2007
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Re: Catholic & Living together
he didn't ask and we didn't volunteer to be honest. when we first met with him, we hadn't moved in together yet, so we could honestly say that dh lived in one place and I lived in another. it really depends on your parish, but I would say most NY priests are not going to bat an eye. The clergy down here in VA is another story all together...
tcotier
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Re: Catholic & Living together
Posted by PegaLega
I personally think its immensely important but to each his own.
Agreed!!
failurebydsign
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Re: Catholic & Living together
Posted by tcotier
Posted by PegaLega
I personally think its immensely important but to each his own.
Agreed!!
double agreed
you need to live with someone to really know them if you can accept all their habits and faults..then get married
jaep129
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Re: Catholic & Living together
We told him flat out we have lived together for a year. We also talked about it at Precana. Also you have to worry about the sex question. They never asked us about sex but I hear from so many brides that their priest and at Precana they do. So just a heads up.
gabbie83
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Re: Catholic & Living together
well we went about 3 weeks ago and i was thinking ohshould we lie or no - but the priest asked my FH a bunch of ?'s - one of them where he lives - and when he asked me - he just looked up and said - Same address? I said yes. and thats it
snowcutie82
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Re: Catholic & Living together
our priest never asked us about our living situation.
it did come up during our precana but that wasn't with the priest...they didn't care either way. so it's not a big deal. it's so common now.
Pinkiegirll07
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Re: Catholic & Living together
Posted by Cpt2007
he didn't ask and we didn't volunteer to be honest. when we first met with him, we hadn't moved in together yet, so we could honestly say that dh lived in one place and I lived in another. it really depends on your parish, but I would say most NY priests are not going to bat an eye. The clergy down here in VA is another story all together...
This is the same for us as well. We weren't living together at the time we went to the church, but moved in together late, so we never had to tell them!
MEMEJOR
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Well when the deacon was asking for addresses... it was the sameone.. I made a joke and said we are livng in sin...
CJandJen
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Re: Catholic & Living together
the priest didn't ask, and we didn't tell. but he did ask me if i was pregnant! i think the church is getting a bit more relaxed now on things like this.
mandab
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I was definitely worried about this too!! You're not alone!! We did end up telling our priest and he didn't even say anything. I guess I was worried about nothing!! My other girlfriend said she told her priest too, and they just had to answer more questions, but it was fine. Good Luck!
kimiequa
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Re: Catholic & Living together
i was nervous too!! my priest is really conservative, but he didn't even say anything when i said we had the same address! phew!
MrsHtobe
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He didn't ask, we didn't volunteer it
If it comes up, we'll admit it, I think its common to live with someone before you are married. .
azailia
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we have a house too and we have been living together for 2 years we met with our priest and we got a lecture, on how it is wrong to live together before marriage... we just sat there and let him talk. it really is stupid. we went and did our foccus survey and we were lectured there too. cant wait to hear what they say at precana!!! just grin and bear it.. they will still marry you. if they didint there would be a lot less people getting married in church.
mrsjpc3
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We live together and told the priest this. We figured it was better than lying.. he was totally fine with it. When you take the FOCCUS test, there is just a separate section you complete for couples that already live together. But I have heard horror stories from those old school priests really grilling the couple about it. I wouldnt worry too much about it! We also did a 1 day - 8 hour pre-cana, and we didnt catch any $hit for it. They were totally cool.
Good luck.
bridej9
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Re: Catholic & Living together
This is really a huge help ladies, thank you so much. Its been worrying me, although I know it is totally normal these day.
But now I feel great, honesty is the best policy and plus, we're doing the right thing now, right!?
