church fees

Our church 'fee' is $500. Then we have to pay $300 for the organist, $50 for the alter guild, and $250 for the priest (honorarium).

We werent expecting the organist to be this much and I personally feel that this is a lot to pay for a church. Are these 'fees' mandatory or do you girls think we can give less for certain things??

My fee was $750.00

We were so surprised that it was so much, and that is not including the organist. What happened to a 'donation'

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Posted by Pokey4

My fee was $750.00

We were so surprised that it was so much, and that is not including the organist. What happened to a 'donation'

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Yea, mine doesnt say 'donation' either. It specifically says 'fee'

OUR CHURCH FEE IS 500
I THINK 50 EACH X 2 FOR THE SEXTONS
25.00 EACH X 2 FOR THE ALTER STAFF
AND ABOUT 150-250 FOR THE PRIEST-DONTATION AND I THINK SOMETHING LIKE 150.00 FOR THE ORGANIST AND AN EXTRA
150.00 BECAUSING WE ARE USING AN OUTSIDE MUSICIAN (KING BRASS TRUMPETEERS) SO THEY GET US FOR THAT TOO, ITS RIDICULOUS

I've never heard of a church asking for a donation for the priest... everything else in my opinion sounds reasonable. the altar guild you wouldn't have to pay if you didn't want altar servers... and they would only be necessary if you were having a Mass... you don't need altar servers for a ceremony.

ALso, keep in mind that the organist and/or cantor are professional musicians that are giving up their weekend do perform at your wedding....honestly, it's a fair price....

my church asked $450.00. (this included the organist and cantor, which we did NOT use). We gave more than the $450.00 because I wanted to give more to my church.

I had friends' children serve as my altar servers and friends that are musicians did my music.

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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Posted by donegal419

I've never heard of a church asking for a donation for the priest... everything else in my opinion sounds reasonable. the altar guild you wouldn't have to pay if you didn't want altar servers... and they would only be necessary if you were having a Mass... you don't need altar servers for a ceremony.

ALso, keep in mind that the organist and/or cantor are professional musicians that are giving up their weekend do perform at your wedding....honestly, it's a fair price....

my church asked $450.00. (this included the organist and cantor, which we did NOT use). We gave more than the $450.00 because I wanted to give more to my church.

I had friends' children serve as my altar servers and friends that are musicians did my music.

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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I understand what you're saying but like you said, your church asked you for $450. My church is costing us $1100. Thats a huge hit to take. Also, we have to pay for the alter guild whether or not we actually use them. I dont mind the $300 for the organist because I do think its fair. But, I dont think the $500 + $250 for the church/priest is fair. Especially when they arent suppose to 'charge' you. Its suppose to be a suggested amount, but in this case its a fee.

our 'donation' is 400 and the musicians are a manatory extra $250... so $650 in total.

On a thread last week someone mentioned that this technically is a donation, so we can write it off on our taxes... I looked it up, and for IRS purposes, you need to have a receipt from the chruch (a cancelled check may not be sufficient).

at least we get some of it back!

We are paying a total of $725 for an 'offering'. This includes $100 for FOCCUS & Pre-Cana.

I don't think we could have given less, as they pretty much tell you that this is the amount....

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Posted by donegal419

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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I could not have said this better myself.

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Posted by AeroJenn

I understand what you're saying but like you said, your church asked you for $450. My church is costing us $1100. Thats a huge hit to take. Also, we have to pay for the alter guild whether or not we actually use them. I dont mind the $300 for the organist because I do think its fair. But, I dont think the $500 + $250 for the church/priest is fair. Especially when they arent suppose to 'charge' you. Its suppose to be a suggested amount, but in this case its a fee.

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Churches fees vary for different reasons. I am sorry that yours is so high. blah! some parishes are very small and so they need to ask for more because they need more help meeting expenses. Some parishes are very large and need to ask for more because they have a large staff to pay, etc.

Are you, or FH or your parents parishoners? Some churches have lower 'fees' for parishoners and even lower 'fees' for parishoners that have been active in the parish community and regularly donate.

The Church will NEVER turn away a couple that wants to marry because of money. You are not paying for the Sacrament... I view it as showing your gratitude for the Sacrament. Any priest or deacon will work with you if money is an issue. However, I think what happens is that priests and deacons see brides booking these expensive reception halls, driving up to the church in a Hummer limo and walking around the church with 3 photographers and a video guy... and so, I think they feel that if you can spend all that money on the secular parts of your day, the Church deserves to get something too.... I also think that many brides have not set foot in a church since their parents dragged them there when they were 10... many have not participated or cared about the parish community and then they want all the bells and whistles from the church when it's time for them to get married and I am sure that can be frustrating from the clergy's stand point.

PLease note, I am not directing any of this at you personally, I am just trying to see it from their point of view....

Overall though paying a large 'fee' or donation can be a sticky situation if you feel it's too high.... Perhaps you can talk to someone at your church about it....

GOOD LUCK!

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Posted by dianadrw

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Posted by donegal419

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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I could not have said this better myself.

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How about the some of us that can not afford $100 receptions? We are also members of the church and donate every week.. Plus my church will not give me the names of the brides that are also having their wedding on the same day so I can see if they want to go in on the alter flowers and the flowers for the sacred mother.. That by the way you can not take with you..

Oh p.s.
My churchs' 'dontation' is $750.00.. My reception per person was $65.00 per person..

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How about the some of us that can not afford $100 receptions? We are also members of the church and donate every week.. Plus my church will not give me the names of the brides that are also having their wedding on the same day so I can see if they want to go in on the alter flowers and the flowers for the sacred mother.. That by the way you can not take with you..

Oh p.s.
My churchs' 'dontation' is $750.00.. My reception per person was $65.00 per person..

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I hear you... I couldn't afford the $100.00 reception either... My reception per person was $52.00 a head... I am a member of my church and I personally and my parents donate every week. granted, my church fee is not as high as yours... but I had NO problem with giving them what they asked.... we actually threw in a little more and I didn't even use their musicians! I think it's a very personal thing on what people want to give their church on their wedding day. I understand when money is tight and you're on a budget and it feels like one more thing that you can't afford.... but to me, it was the thing that was most important to me on my wedding, so i didn't mind.

My church actually encouraged us at Pre-Cana to coordinate with the other people getting married that weekend to share in floral costs. That's unfortunate that they don't do that... maybe you'll meet someoen at Pre-Cana and you can coordinate something yourself. However, because there was so many weddings and funerals that weekend, they let me take the floral arrangements to the hall because I did not do any centerpieces.... I was lucky....

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Posted by SoontobeMrsM

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Posted by dianadrw

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Posted by donegal419

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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I could not have said this better myself.

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How about the some of us that can not afford $100 receptions? We are also members of the church and donate every week.. Plus my church will not give me the names of the brides that are also having their wedding on the same day so I can see if they want to go in on the alter flowers and the flowers for the sacred mother.. That by the way you can not take with you..

Oh p.s.
My churchs' 'dontation' is $750.00.. My reception per person was $65.00 per person..

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I agree. We are also not paying anywhere near $100 per person for our reception hall. We also used all budget vendors and cut costs wherever we could. That was a very general blanket statement assumming that all brides are having expensive weddings.

I agree that the church deserves money too. Of course they do. But....over $1000 for a 20 minute ceremony is a bit excessive when couples are trying their best to save. JMO.

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Posted by AeroJenn

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Posted by SoontobeMrsM

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Posted by dianadrw

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Posted by donegal419

I don't mean to offend anyone, but if people can afford $100.00 and up PER PERSON at a reception hall, you can surely give the church a nice gift in grateful receipt of the Sacrament.... JMO. And plus, most churches rely on the generosity of their parishoners to keep the church, parish school and other services running.

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I could not have said this better myself.

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How about the some of us that can not afford $100 receptions? We are also members of the church and donate every week.. Plus my church will not give me the names of the brides that are also having their wedding on the same day so I can see if they want to go in on the alter flowers and the flowers for the sacred mother.. That by the way you can not take with you..

Oh p.s.
My churchs' 'dontation' is $750.00.. My reception per person was $65.00 per person..

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I agree. We are also not paying anywhere near $100 per person for our reception hall. We also used all budget vendors and cut costs wherever we could. That was a very general blanket statement assumming that all brides are having expensive weddings.

I agree that the church deserves money too. Of course they do. But....over $1000 for a 20 minute ceremony is a bit excessive when couples are trying their best to save. JMO.

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I understand your point and I had a problem with this also. MY CHURCH that I belong to and give generously to every week when I attend and also to other things they have wanted 1800 I thought that was a bit excessive. I was still willing to pay it because it was my church but then I started to feel like I needed something closer to my hall and my church was not accomodating to me for paying this kind of money. They kept giving me the run around. So I started looking into other churches. I tried the one you are speakin about but they never returned my calls.
Then I found a great one and Im paying about 800.