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WOW... I would put her name on the invites.. I thin it's proper to honor the parents
Posted by mRm2008
Posted by jennandrolo
i did give in and put her name on the invite cuz really its not worth the fight.
Yep my FMIL is very much the same as you describe yours. FH is sick of her SH!T as well,and has told her numerous times about it. She is still blowed out over the whole Christmas 'incident' and brought that up to him Monday when he dropped by to see them
AND speaking of invitation wording and not being worth the fight.....FH's older brother and SIL did NOT use his parents names on their invite. They were not supportive of their wedding (emotionally or monetarily)) because OH YES...they 'HAD' to get married (as termed by his parents - you know where I am going). 16 years later that invite hangs in their kitchen because they won't let that son live it down.![]()
If you ever need to vent feel free to FM me!
I had a similar issue with the invites. Honestly I didnt want to put FIL's on there because they didnt contribute anything. My mom is paying for most of the wedding and FH and I the rest. Why would I put them as if they are throwing it! So I put them under FH's name, son of Mr. and Mrs. etc. FH didnt complain after that, so they can deal with it.
ughhh I am so sorry you have to deal with this. This is something you hear more and more about weither it's fil or a brides own family. It's so difficult because so many people loose focus that is't their child's day not theirs. Well I hope things go smooth for you and you are a good fdil for dealing with all of it!
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this, my FMIL has threatened 3x not to come if we dont do excatly what she wants. You and FH have to be happy, thats all you need to worry about.
Posted by davenjess
i am sorry that you are going through all of this....
the way we handled who his parents' invited & who my parents invited was quite simple, after we received the lists.
On my parents' list were peope that had all met Dave & we had seen over the years of our dating...
On his parents' list were people Dave hadn't seen in more than 20 years & people whom i'd never met.
His mom FREAKED when we said no. Our answer - if we run into a budgetary issue with inviting parents' friends...jess' parents have offered to pay for their friends. Can you do the same? If not - your friends DO NOT COME...that shut her up immediately.
Posted by jennandrolo
So FMIL is clearly not happy about the wedding and I understand because she is a single mother and FH is the last one to leave the house but she is getting absolutely ridiculous. This is the crap Ive had to deal with so far:
-If her name is not in the invite wording, shes not coming.
-Shes insisting on waiting for the last minute to buy her dress cuz she wants so lose wait....with the diet and exercise shes not doing.
-May not want to do mother/son dance because apparently shes never danced in her life
-We cant give out just personalized kisses and favor tins with mint as a favor. Its not right and we have to give out something else (that to me will just be thrown away or thrown in a drawer never to be seen again)
-And the new one........FH and I are doing things all WRONG. We didnt ask her for a list of her friends that she would like to invite and why arent we inviting FH's family from NJ (that he hasnt seen or heard from in 10 yrs!!!)
Nevermind the fact that we have 3 of her friends already on there that we KNOW, we're not inviting friends of hers that we dont know. She wants to add people but hasnt given us a dime towards this wedding. She told FH of her friend whos daughter got married and asked her who she wanted to invite. GOOOOOOD for her!
My parents are paying for our photog and have helped make payments to RH and even with that have told me its my wedding, I invite who I want and do whatever I want.
My budget is getting tighter by the second so what makes FMIL think shes going to sway my decisions by talking crap? I know shes gossiping with her friends about this and it annoys the hell out of me.
Posted by jessnstu08
welcome to my world ! I can totally relate
my FMIL has said she is not comming to the wedding because it isn't going to be kosher ( I am jewish but not religious , and 95% of my guests aren't , and those who are will have meals brought in to accomodate ) and complains about this and that, yet has contributed nothing financially OR emotionally.
every time the wedding comes up she changes the subject . She is annoyed that i stole her baby ( who is 37 , only child and lived at home and supported her until we moved in together )
My advise to you it to have your FH deal with her and let her know that her behavior is unacceptable. if she doesn't want to do the mother/son dance, ect, it will be a reflection of HER not you. DO NOT let her sabotage your day .![]()
Posted by SANDYROODY
Posted by jennandrolo
So FMIL is clearly not happy about the wedding and I understand because she is a single mother and FH is the last one to leave the house but she is getting absolutely ridiculous. This is the crap Ive had to deal with so far:
-If her name is not in the invite wording, shes not coming.
-Shes insisting on waiting for the last minute to buy her dress cuz she wants so lose wait....with the diet and exercise shes not doing.
-May not want to do mother/son dance because apparently shes never danced in her life
-We cant give out just personalized kisses and favor tins with mint as a favor. Its not right and we have to give out something else (that to me will just be thrown away or thrown in a drawer never to be seen again)
-And the new one........FH and I are doing things all WRONG. We didnt ask her for a list of her friends that she would like to invite and why arent we inviting FH's family from NJ (that he hasnt seen or heard from in 10 yrs!!!)
Nevermind the fact that we have 3 of her friends already on there that we KNOW, we're not inviting friends of hers that we dont know. She wants to add people but hasnt given us a dime towards this wedding. She told FH of her friend whos daughter got married and asked her who she wanted to invite. GOOOOOOD for her!
My parents are paying for our photog and have helped make payments to RH and even with that have told me its my wedding, I invite who I want and do whatever I want.
My budget is getting tighter by the second so what makes FMIL think shes going to sway my decisions by talking crap? I know shes gossiping with her friends about this and it annoys the hell out of me.
By any chance, does she have a lost twin sister because she sounds like my MIL. At first, she seemed okay but now she is driving me and FH absolutely NUTS!
LIW should really hold a contest ...submit your worst FMIL moment and win a prize. Competition would be so tough.
