Confused.

Hey Ladies,

We decided we are going to have a small wedding in Ireland (a lot of my family is there, and this is where he is originally from) To be honest we would only be inviting the most- 25 people from over here, and we would stress the fact that we would all love for them to come, but at the same time, realize it's a lot to ask, and therefore, will be no pressure if they can't make it.

Here is my dilemma:

I was going to have a small BP of 4 girls. Being that we are having a destination wedding, I told my MOH that I did not want to have a shower at a restaurant, at someone' s house would be perfect. FH and I decided we would pay for the accomodation for our over seas BP..... (BTW- I havn't asked the BP yet)

I was just talking to a 'potential' BM and she basically told me she doesn't even know if she'll go to my wedding! Of course I did not tell her about our plans, but now I feel like she's not gonna come- so why even ask her to be in my party?

ETA: The idea about not having a shower is so hey can take whatever money that would have cost and put that towards their ticket!

You're right. I am going to ask. She doesn't have to take time off because we are both teachers and that is our February break.

Agree!
Ask her-what is the worst that happens she tells you she just really cant afford it? It may be just a matter of not being able to afford to stay there or fly there. If she is important to you and want her to be part of your day the worst thing you can do is not ask-and have her be a guest instead

I think if you plan on asking her now would be a good time b/c she can start saving money. Also if you are getting married in Feb you can usually get some nice deals traveling to Ireland it is not as expensive since it is off season, not like trying to pay for a ticket to Ireland in December, or the summer time.

By the way where in Clare?

Yeah I am going to still ask! I know it seems like a lot, but my hopes were that in lieu of a shower they can put their money for a ticket. The fares are pretty cheap in Feb, esp mid week.


Anyway, we are getting married in Quilty, where my family is from. We are looking to book it at the Armada in Spanish Point...

Are you familiar with the area?

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Posted by PaddysGirl15

Yeah I am going to still ask! I know it seems like a lot, but my hopes were that in lieu of a shower they can put their money for a ticket. The fares are pretty cheap in Feb, esp mid week.


Anyway, we are getting married in Quilty, where my family is from. We are looking to book it at the Armada in Spanish Point...

Are you familiar with the area?

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My fathers family is from Cree, in Co. Clare, from what my mom tells me it's not far from Quilty. My mom is from ballinamore, Leitrim
spent many summers in Ireland, and went to school in dublin for a semester. Your wedding should be gorgeous

Aw thank you!! My grandmother was the only of ten to come over here, so I have about 6.2 million cousins in Quilty. I absolutely love it over there! FH is from Tipperary which is only about a 2 hour drive from there, its also beautiful, but he wanted to get married someplace different!

My cousin is going to have the priest email me (sounds sooooo advanced compared to the stories I used to hear from my grandmother) and I am going to get the date all sorted.


And I am definitely going pick up a copy of the Irish Echo!!!

Thanks a million!!

i definitly think you should ask her. her mind will probably change once she realizes how important she is in your life. But - if she declines you cannot be angry at her - she did already warn you - and destination weddings require a lot from the BP.

good luck..