Yikes, this got pretty long.
But I'm really glad you guys are interested, so let me know if its helpful. And -- as my original post said -- if anyone gets into this book like I did let me know -- I'd love to compare notes!
If all this is overwhelming you might just want to check out the website:
www.consciousweddings.com (I haven't really been there -- but its referred to a lot in the book).
I'm including an image of the cover including the subtitle of the book: 'How the Prepare Emotionally, Practically, and Spiritually for a Meaningful and Joyous Wedding'
I think this is a good description of what you'll find inside.
The chapters include all the normal stuff you'll find in a planner, like 'finding your dress,' 'making the guest list,' ect, but it also has a chapter on Money and The First Year -- things we all know can be difficult but never talk about.
And in the chapters she gives you the basic practical advice, but there are also activities that help you to look at your emotions connected to the choices you are making.
For example -- I just found my dress (!) But before I found it I read about how the dress is a really potent symbol and about all the emotions connected to putting it on, how you should feel when you find 'the one' and why some of the emotion attached to finding it have to do with 'letting go of singlehood.' So I did a checklist of the fears I had connected to this.
At first I was interested in the book because even though I am madly in love with FH, estatic to get married, and even excited about planning the wedding, I constantly felt overwhelmed by the process in the beginning. And snce I'm a Virgo -- in other words an obsessive, neurotic, worrier, I was literally dreading all the decisions I'd have to make in order to have 'the perfect wedding'.
My FH is great when it comes to the planning -- he wants to be involved with everything, but that actually sort of made it worse. And then I realized that its not the reception hall or the favors that I'm really worried about. In fact focusing on some of those choices may be a way to avoid the real work of preparing emotionally to be married.
Now that I've had the book for a couple of months (I spend probably a half hour on it every 2 weeks) its no longer my 'secret' -- its something FH and I work on together. Right now we are working on our ceremony. And as the book recommends we have set dates on our pre-anniversaries. So the 9th of every month is a day that we are going to spend some time together doing something special for the wedding. Another part of this chapter is an exercise that has you write your own vows -- we want to have traditional vows in the actual wedding, but I'm looking forward to hearing what my FH would say.
By about half way through the book it gets much more into the practical side and has all the necessary timetables and checklists --- what you need to get a marriage license, what to have in your make-up bag, how to make a contract with a vendor and all that. It also has a gift log for your thank-yous and a blank calendar -- I its really practical too.
Unfortunately its pretty big and not something I would carry around, so I got a smaller planner to keep business cards, etc in.
I think this author also has a non-planner book that just gives examples of various brides and their experiences. But she is a therapist -- so I think its mostly examples that illustrate working through issues -- the planner is more fun!
Hope this is helpful.
FM me if you are interested!
