Cousins w/ out a date??

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:29 AM

Cousins w/ out a date??

We have reserved a room for my cousins and aunt to share at the inn. My questions is they do not have a 'significant' other.. do we send then an invatation just to them or do we add a guest. They live out in Queens that's why we got them a room..But if they bring a guest the guest will have no place to stay.

JennJay Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:36 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I think it depends on the age of your cousin. I would say if they are 18+ invite with a guest even if they don't have a significant other.

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:36 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Posted by JennJay

I think it depends on the age of your cousin. I would say if they are 18+ invite with a guest even if they don't have a significant other.

they are in there 30's

LisaJill Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:37 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I am not inviting my cousins or his cousins with date unless they are living with someone, engaged to them or married. Period. Once I make one exception, then I am looking at an additional 7-8 people which is like $1000 more for people I don't know. My cousins know each other and I have a cousin ath is 24 and one that is 21 -- they don't need dates if they are not serious with someone. Eat drink and be merry for the day! I think if you are going to set limitations on those you intend to invite with guest and those you intend to invite alone -- you have to stick to it across the board, the only exception being those in the wedding party and of course parents. JMHO

JennJay Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:41 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Posted by LisaJill

I am not inviting my cousins or his cousins with date unless they are living with someone, engaged to them or married. Period. Once I make one exception, then I am looking at an additional 7-8 people which is like $1000 more for people I don't know. My cousins know each other and I have a cousin ath is 24 and one that is 21 -- they don't need dates if they are not serious with someone. Eat drink and be merry for the day! I think if you are going to set limitations on those you intend to invite with guest and those you intend to invite alone -- you have to stick to it across the board, the only exception being those in the wedding party and of course parents. JMHO

That is true, it does run into money. Now that I am thinking about it, maybe I will do the same. Only invite with guest if they are serious.

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:43 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Well I did read some place in an etiquette / invation thing on line that if they do not have a significant other you do not have to add a guest..but then I think that might be kinda cheesy

LisaJill Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:48 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

In my situation, I am having a Sunday afternoon wedding, 12-5. Maybe that makes the situation slightly different, I don't know. I just feel ilke, it is a freakin' afternoon -- people can sit with other people eat a little and dance. This is not the ball of the century, you know? 1-5 they are alone. but at over $100 pp, and being that I really want a small wedding (under 150), it just seems kinda ridiculous to have all these randoms floating around the wedding. I also feel like, this is not a big saturday night event, maybe if that were the case I would have to change my thinking. Sigh, now you are making me feel bad! I feel like people not in serious relationships feel the need to run out and find a date, and truth be told, it is a big expense for me.

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:51 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Posted by LisaJill

In my situation, I am having a Sunday afternoon wedding, 12-5. Maybe that makes the situation slightly different, I don't know. I just feel ilke, it is a freakin' afternoon -- people can sit with other people eat a little and dance. This is not the ball of the century, you know? 1-5 they are alone. but at over $100 pp, and being that I really want a small wedding (under 150), it just seems kinda ridiculous to have all these randoms floating around the wedding. I also feel like, this is not a big saturday night event, maybe if that were the case I would have to change my thinking. Sigh, now you are making me feel bad! I feel like people not in serious relationships feel the need to run out and find a date, and truth be told, it is a big expense for me.

don't feel bad..Im sorry... Its up to you.. you did not send out your invitations yet you can still change your mind. Also that you are having it in the afternoons oon is diff.. my family is traveling out here from queens and are staying over night

heatherfaith Posted: Feb 20, 2006 11:20 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

i was in this situation and we invited almost everyone with a guest. I just think its cheesy to invite them alone. even if they are not super serious with someone they might be dating someone and would feel uncomfortable going alone.

ewickens Posted: Feb 20, 2006 11:20 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Since some of my cousins are freshman in college, we're just putting 'and Guest' on the invitation. My cousins in high school are not going to have this option.

waterspout4 Posted: Feb 20, 2006 11:48 AM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I guess I'm in the minority, but I'll speak up anyway. We didn't invite any of our cousins with a guest. (ages 16-26) Only one is living with her boyfriend, so he was invited by name. They all know each other, so they'll be fine.

Etiquette? I don't care. My bridesmaids are wearing black in the Spring. Oh, the horror!

And if you do want to invite yours with a guest, let them get their own room. You're not a money machine. You have more important things to worry about than where Johnny's girlfriend of the month is going to sleep.

LisaJill Posted: Feb 20, 2006 12:05 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 12:13 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

Posted by waterspout4

I guess I'm in the minority, but I'll speak up anyway. We didn't invite any of our cousins with a guest. (ages 16-26) Only one is living with her boyfriend, so he was invited by name. They all know each other, so they'll be fine.

Etiquette? I don't care. My bridesmaids are wearing black in the Spring. Oh, the horror!

And if you do want to invite yours with a guest, let them get their own room. You're not a money machine. You have more important things to worry about than where Johnny's girlfriend of the month is going to sleep.

your 2 funny

waterspout4 Posted: Feb 20, 2006 12:46 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I'm glad you found it funny. Sometimes I forget that people don't know me and might find my sarcasm offensive. Phew!

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 20, 2006 02:22 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

sr081906 Posted: Feb 20, 2006 03:29 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I did not even invite the cousins.... I did not see some of them for 15 years anyway!

Invite whoever you want. Who cares who is offended? It's your day and your money!

October Bliss Posted: Feb 20, 2006 09:57 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I just cut 5 of my cousins (and their spouses) off my guest list. For the remaining cousins - two are married - two are single. The singles are being invited exactly that way - as singles. FH's cousins are all involved in serious relationships (living with someone) or actually married. Those cousins are being invited with their SO, because they are living together.

All other single people are being invited as single people. One, I can't afford to include guests, and two, I really don't want random people I've never ever met floating around at my wedding, three, I don't want the few single friends I have hooking up with some guy in a bar the week before my wedding just so they have a date.

BRIDEMICHELE Posted: Feb 20, 2006 10:17 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

When I first started planning, I kept thinking that I had to invite everyone over 18 with guest. But then I started thinking about it and I thought that if I left off guests when there was no significant other in the picture I could invite way more people. I want to try to eliminate strangers at my wedding as much as possible.

hsacks23r Posted: Feb 21, 2006 02:13 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

well looking over my list ther are only 4 people to invite w/guest and that is including the 2 cousins so I am going to go ahead and add guest.. let them have to wrorry about where ther guest will stay or go home
We need to make our 90 min and that is an extar 4 people other wise I migh be short

MissingTheBGene Posted: Feb 21, 2006 02:18 PM

Re: Cousins w/ out a date??

I don't think I would call it 'etiquette' per say, but I feel that if you're inviting an adult, then they should be invited with a guest. But that's just my thinking.

ETA:: And yes, let them worry about their accommodations, if they choose to bring someone.